Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Lennes

Search for a member

Lennes

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 20 August 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 9407
  • Number of comments : 83
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About Lennes : My name is, as far as you know, Lennes.
I enjoy video games, reading, writing, drawing, and, as of recently, acting. And dark shows. And dark movies. And dark books. And... You know, I just like there to be a little darkness. Not total darkness; more like a lit room with a slightly shadowed corner. A twinge of tragedy and hopelessness acts as a beautiful foil to the light, bringing out its glory to a fuller extent. Like putting salt on a watermelon. God that's good.
I also have a rather bad habit of watching anime far to much, and I find myself disappointed in the fact that it is typically abhorred. I find it narrow minded and obtuse. The abhorring, that is. God that's a great word. Abhor. It just rolls off the tongue. Like melancholy. Ah, another magnificent word.
I generally consider myself a terrible person due to my cynicism and misanthropy in my moments of seriousness. However, I hope to one day make up for this.

Lennes's page activity

Visits<b>alice_18</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 1:27am<b>misteygirl</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 4:10pm<b>claudia19801811</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 5:26am<b>Qiuakii</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 8:44am<b>SnapTail6</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 12:56am<b>RagingWill</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 4:24pm<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 5:04pm<b>muslimpride</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 4:03pm<b>cumberbunny</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 3:49am<b>fluffy_dog</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 10:50pm<b>zack30497</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 1:34pm<b>extrasnipes</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 3:05pm<b>BoltTheSuperdog</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 3:54am<b>A_Rabid_Dear</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 12:55am<b>loopyloop64</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 5:06pm<b>notachinesewoman</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 1:19am<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 9:59pm<b>ezrocks4u</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 1:43am

Lennes's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of Lennes's badges

Lennes's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my therapist that I suspected my partner was unfaithful, but I don't think he believed me. "What, did you find a membership card to a sex club in his wallet or something?" he asked. When I got home, I looked in my partner's wallet. I found a membership card to a sex club. FML

#4158714
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46147) - you deserved it (4049)

On 07/30/2009 at 11:21am - intimacy - by thesockmancometh (man) - United States (Texas) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I was at my job as a flight attendant. A passenger on my plane stopped breathing and turned blue. As I cleared his airways and was busy strapping an oxygen mask to his face, the passenger behind him tried to hand me her trash. Apparently I'm a walking trash can, no matter what I'm doing. FML

#4100528
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61215) - you deserved it (2857)

On 07/28/2009 at 3:29am - work - by skygoddess (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I moved into university residence, looking forward to finally being able to come out of the closet. I started chatting with the hot guy moving in next door to me. He said I was cool, and he was glad because he was afraid he'd be living next to a gay guy. FML

#3984590
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49460) - you deserved it (9987)

On 07/23/2009 at 6:09pm - love - by simon (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told me that so I'd let him have girls in his bedroom. FML

#3842566
432 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35375) - you deserved it (94126)

On 07/17/2009 at 10:00pm - kids - by Pumpkin (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my neighbor confessed to me that he was homophobic and regrets that his family doesnt know it. He spent fifteen minutes explaining how much he would hate to have a gay child. I spent two hours last night convincing his son that it was the right thing to tell his family he was gay. FML

#3776929
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51870) - you deserved it (4832)

On 07/15/2009 at 3:33pm - misc - by mook (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my friend posted my picture on Craigslist under the "men seeking men" section. I got 16 replies with 2 hours. He then decided to post another picture of me under "men seeking women" to compare results. The only reply I got was from a man. FML

#3713033
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43798) - you deserved it (3650)

On 07/13/2009 at 9:09am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband gave me an ultimatum - choose him or my male best friend. I chose my husband. My husband then admitted to me that he was hoping I would choose my best friend so he would have an excuse to leave me and wouldn't have to tell me he's been cheating on me. FML

#3634399
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64272) - you deserved it (3965)

On 07/10/2009 at 5:21am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I saw a major accident then stopped to help the drivers. I was on my way to a rest stop to use the bathroom so as we were waiting for police I went into the woods and I come out to the police arresting me for public urination. One of the drivers said I was "using the woods for a bathroom." FML

#3528388
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40431) - you deserved it (3942)

On 07/06/2009 at 3:34pm - misc - by JMU (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my friend told me that she gave my number to a guy I've liked for a while. I asked why and she just said "He's just going to have to tell you himself." I got hopeful and really nervous. A few hours later he calls. Turns out, he's called to try and get a date with my gay friend. FML

#3491271
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34050) - you deserved it (2846)

On 07/04/2009 at 10:40pm - love - by Single4Life (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I learned my 40 year old father is marrying a girl barely a year and a half older than me. She told me not to be afraid to call her mom. I was torn between punching her in the face and vomiting. FML

#3264690
265 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66184) - you deserved it (2910)

On 06/27/2009 at 1:32am - misc - by OfCourse (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was on the phone with my best friend who lives out of town. He was strangely quiet. Later that day I asked him why he didn't talk much. He admitted he was jacking off to the sound of my voice. FML

#2975022
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51595) - you deserved it (4396)

On 06/17/2009 at 7:27pm - intimacy - by automaticfail_00 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking by a bunch of pretty girls. I'm not the most attractive boy, so I walked by nervously. I heard one yell "Hey cutie!" I turned to look, and they started laughing. She said "Oh my god, sorry! I assumed you were cute from your butt!" Apparently, my ass is nicer than my face. FML

#2894787
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58469) - you deserved it (2921)

On 06/14/2009 at 8:39pm - misc - by bitches. (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, was my senior prom. I've had a crush on my date for months, but after many attempts at grinding with him and sexy seduction, he rejected me saying he was a good Catholic boy. I later found out that not only is he in touch with his religion, but intimately in touch with other boys. FML

#2871893
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44346) - you deserved it (6309)

On 06/13/2009 at 11:06pm - intimacy - by failatboys (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: