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LemonandLime

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LemonandLime

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 758
  • Number of comments : 117
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 28 posted

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LemonandLime's page activity

Visits<b>aruden</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 6:11pm<b>sarmo1995</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 10:50am<b>colinlb</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 11:03pm<b>Star928</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 2:07am<b>hunteryager</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 7:36pm<b>Dawnstempest</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 6:08pm<b>piosc</b> - the 10/16/2013 at 6:30pm<b>feven52</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 4:07pm<b>BeautifulEvil</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 9:56am<b>FightMyLiger</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 12:28am<b>girlrome</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 12:53pm<b>myproblems</b> - the 08/17/2013 at 1:02am<b>xcicistarx</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 11:22pm<b>suckmyclock</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 12:01pm<b>Myisss01</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 1:54pm<b>xTrepidation</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 5:48pm<b>intheheart</b> - the 07/06/2013 at 7:45pm<b>whatsarah</b> - the 07/01/2013 at 6:37pm

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LemonandLime's favorite FMLs

Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML

#20585643
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37434) - you deserved it (9110)

On 04/11/2013 at 8:59pm - animals - by anyonmus - United States (Maryland)

Today, my Romeo and Juliet style relationship hit an all time low when my boyfriend's parents filed a lawsuit against my parents. FML

#20585611
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44546) - you deserved it (6024)

On 04/11/2013 at 8:40pm - love - by Juliet (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my racist, homophobic, generally degenerate grandmother visited. Within 20 minutes, she uttered multiple racial slurs, said Robert Downey Jr. will burn in hell for playing a black man in one of his movies, and yelled that she'd "whip the piss" out of me, after I asked her to leave. FML

#20584991
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34363) - you deserved it (5705)

On 04/11/2013 at 1:16pm - misc - by no tea parties here, gran (man) - United States

Today, I regretfully confessed to my parents I have trichotillomania. There was a torturous pause, followed by the question, "Are you gay?" FML

#20575858
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29724) - you deserved it (4534)

On 04/05/2013 at 7:23am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I regretfully confessed to my parents I have trichotillomania. There was a torturous pause, followed by the question, "Are you gay?" FML

#20575858
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29724) - you deserved it (4534)

On 04/05/2013 at 7:23am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I carried flat-packed boxes home from work to move my things into a new apartment. Whilst walking down the street, the wind kept blowing and spinning me round. A crowd eventually gathered, mistaking me for a street performer. Nobody helped or even threw me any loose change. FML

#20575849
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28383) - you deserved it (3316)

On 04/05/2013 at 7:04am - misc - by Gem - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, I almost lost my virginity at the age of 34. After years of putting off sex and waiting for marriage, the moment arrived. My new wife could't stop laughing at how small I am. FML

#20562346
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68006) - you deserved it (10186)

On 03/27/2013 at 12:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend accused me of being a feeder, saying that's why she's been putting on so much weight. When I said it might be because she eats at McDonalds everyday, and that I was willing to start cooking low-calorie foods for us, she hit me. Then she went to McDonalds. FML

#20538059
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40830) - you deserved it (4756)

On 03/10/2013 at 12:03pm - love - by Raiden (man) - United Kingdom (Barnsley)

Today, my boyfriend left me for a girl I know. She was the girl my last boyfriend left me for. FML

#20536593
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47699) - you deserved it (3336)

On 03/09/2013 at 1:16am - love - by itsnotyouitsher - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while working at Starbucks, a man came in and placed his order. I made his drink, topped it with whipped cream, and put the lid on. Some cream was seeping out of the top. He looked at me and said, "Good... you left a nipple..." and slowly licked it off. FML

#20536585
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29406) - you deserved it (3198)

On 03/09/2013 at 1:06am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after my 5-year-old finally got over his grandmother's death, we went to a store and saw a lady that looked exactly like her. She came up to us asking if we saw her grandson; I can't get my son to stop freaking out. FML

#20535134
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36841) - you deserved it (2156)

On 03/07/2013 at 8:55pm - kids - by Maxie - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was taking a patient's blood pressure, and listening for his pulse with my stethoscope. I couldn't hear anything, so I adjusted the cuff and tried again. Still no pulse. He pointed out that my stethoscope was the wrong way around and sneered, "You been smokin' the reefer, boy?" FML

#20535043
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12956) - you deserved it (32004)

On 03/07/2013 at 7:35pm - work - by no sir I have not (man) - United States

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said yes, and I excitedly called my mother to tell her about our engagement. She half-heartedly said, "Aww, that's nice", before changing the topic to what she'd found in her turd earlier. FML

#20534623
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31880) - you deserved it (2242)

On 03/07/2013 at 12:10pm - love - by it's shitty, yeah, stfu (man) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, while I was shaving my nether regions, my trimmer slipped and ate a chunk out of my balls, right beside a vein. I've been bleeding on and off for an hour, and the New Skin I tried isn't able to dry quickly enough. FML

#20520338
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36239) - you deserved it (7996)

On 02/24/2013 at 2:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went sledding with my friends. I said I was tired and didn't want to go, but they press-ganged me into it. I ended up sledding right into a tree, fracturing my leg, and scraping up my entire face. FML

#20520149
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24966) - you deserved it (4767)

On 02/24/2013 at 12:36pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

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