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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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LemonMan

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LemonMan
  • Town/Country : Phoenix, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 3 November 1994 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 680
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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LemonMan's favorite FMLs

Today, I was running a marathon for my school. Two hot girls started talking to me, so I glanced at them and smiled. I turned back, just in time to knee a little boy in the face. FML

#13662632 (63)

I agree, your life sucks (15160) - you deserved it (5151)

On 10/31/2010 at 11:34am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was watching tv with my grandpa, and he stops flipping channels on a movie with a hot naked chick getting oiled down. Suddenly the remote lands on my stomach as my mom and grandma walk in the door. They yelled at me for being a pervert for an hour, while my grandpa sat and chuckled. FML

#13180631 (187)

I agree, your life sucks (27205) - you deserved it (2896)

On 09/24/2010 at 6:22am - misc - by Andrew - United States (Indiana)

Today, my schlong decided to enter Mortal Kombat with my pants zipper. Guess which of the two won a flawless victory? FML

#9133208 (337)

I agree, your life sucks (20524) - you deserved it (5172)

On 03/16/2010 at 2:55pm - health - by liu_kang - United States

Today, I started to type up a mass text to tell a decent amount of my friends that I'd just come home to a surprise from my boyfriend. Trying to fix a typo, I accidentally hit send with the text only saying "Guess what?! I just came." FML

#9070560 (245)

I agree, your life sucks (16817) - you deserved it (7204)

On 03/14/2010 at 10:49am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

#8751188 (453)

I agree, your life sucks (33670) - you deserved it (6913)

On 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend of one week is suicidal and crazy about me. She showed me that she carved her old boyfriends name in her arm and she threatened suicide if I ever left her. FML

#7962571 (193)

I agree, your life sucks (30515) - you deserved it (2389)

On 02/07/2010 at 2:16am - love - by mike (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was at a school rally I was talking to my friends when I noticed the entire gym had gotten quiet. Not knowing why I thought it would be funny to yell out "it's too quiet!" apparently it was a moment of silence for a teacher that had recently died. FML

#7889872 (164)

I agree, your life sucks (4452) - you deserved it (40453)

On 02/04/2010 at 10:12pm - misc - by ... - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was spacing out in French class and randomly got an erection. My professor called on me to stand up at the front of the room and say, "I am wearing a belt," in French. Not everyone was observing just my belt. FML

#7782514 (228)

I agree, your life sucks (22492) - you deserved it (3933)

On 02/01/2010 at 3:51pm - misc - by boner (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML

#7773873 (440)

I agree, your life sucks (72164) - you deserved it (7427)

On 02/01/2010 at 5:23am - misc - by doesnttastegood (woman) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, my boyfriend took me to meet his friends at one of his exclusive "clubs." Expecting it to be his old friends from college, I agreed to go. Apparently, I've been dating a member of the Ku Klux Klan for 2 years. FML

#7380749 (55)

I agree, your life sucks (48642) - you deserved it (5096)

On 01/16/2010 at 4:24pm - love - by Awkward (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I took the bus to work and a sweet old lady got on after me and sat next to me. Halfway to work, she fell asleep and her head was on my shoulder. Trying to be nice, I gently tried to wake her up before my stop came. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

#960425 (667)

I agree, your life sucks (402847) - you deserved it (26901)

On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML

#86179 (668)

I agree, your life sucks (538179) - you deserved it (47596)

On 02/20/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by Mick (man) - United States (Colorado)