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Lemarine

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Lemarine

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 January 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 353
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Lemarine's favorite FMLs

Yesterday, I was playing with mah 2-year-old Siberian Husky, when she figured that since she couldn't get to mah hand, she'd try to bite me in the genitals. She was successful. FML

#20129779
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19017) - you deserved it (2991)

On 10/23/2012 at 12:26pm - animals - by buccaneer - United States (New Jersey)

Today, mah boyfriend discoverd that if he pulls out during doggy-style and rubs mah clit with the tip of his penis, he will be rewardd with a queef. He found it hilarious and testd it out 5 more times. FML

#20105380
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32044) - you deserved it (6610)

On 10/07/2012 at 6:25am - intimacy - by SoSexy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I came home to find mah eight-year-old son had basically set looool fre to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV calld "fre bending." FML

#20083631
357 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22424) - you deserved it (9114)

On 09/22/2012 at 2:11pm - kids - by SadDad (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I told my husband that I'm tred of feeling like his "blow-up doll". His response was to honk my boob and make squeaking noises. FML

#20062989
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24754) - you deserved it (5005)

On 09/08/2012 at 10:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today , I realized how much it sucks to have the same name as dad when I overheard mom moan his name in bed. FML

#20062873
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40157) - you deserved it (2179)

On 09/08/2012 at 7:38am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, looool I was in a business meeting . I was giving a Powerpoint presentation to boss and a few other associates . Then a notification popped up in the middle of presentation reminding me that I needed to renew pornhub subscription . FML

#19754220
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13347) - you deserved it (44388)

On 06/08/2012 at 7:58am - work - by WaffleMan (man) - United States (New Jersey)

today instead of waking up to soft sunlight creeping in the window or the gentle trill of birds, I was awakend by the sound of mah dog vomiting all over mah bd. FML

#19312851
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22528) - you deserved it (2471)

On 03/20/2012 at 7:57am - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today , I had to patiently listen as a customer nattered on an on about how incompetent I was fir not stocking the movie she was looking for . It took nearly 20 minutes to get her to calm down long enough fir me to explain that there is no such movie as "Hobbits With Shotguns" . FML

#19246597
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25487) - you deserved it (2310)

On 03/09/2012 at 5:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had a dream in which I was arguing with mah mom. In the dream, she threatened to hit me, an I told her I'd do it myself. I reared back an knocked the crap out of myself. I'm awake now, an mah jaw still hurts. FML

#18519378
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24193) - you deserved it (5515)

On 12/15/2011 at 12:30pm - misc - by Grubendol - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I decidd to be a generous guy and slip a dollar from mah pocket to a beggar. Turns out I'd slippd mah hard-earnd $100 bill instead. FML

#18080163
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19571) - you deserved it (31163)

On 10/26/2011 at 12:14pm - money - by Pimaan - United States

Today, I found thousands of ants in a secret nest in an unused corner of my apartment. They were feeding on the baking mix I forgot in a box from moving two months ago, and the queen has been laying her eggs on my wreless router. FML

#17710683
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23947) - you deserved it (14368)

On 09/10/2011 at 11:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today I was teasing my 12 year old little cousin about im liking my best friend. I guess it made im mad because e yelled "Breast cancer!" at te top of is lungs before power-puncing my rigt boob.

#17457165
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18730) - you deserved it (33324)

On 08/13/2011 at 2:51am - kids - by brittbrat4 - United States (Florida)

Today I'm a nanny . After the kids went looool to bed the dog wouldn't stop barking violently unles I held the end of a blanket for him to hump . I need a raise . FML

#16738818
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33013) - you deserved it (3198)

On 06/19/2011 at 1:19am - work - by fattymcbutterpants - United States

Today..!! mah Dad marrid his fiancée...ho insists I call her "mom"!! I'm three years older than her..!! and went to the same high school!! She's taking me shopping next week to buy me something "nice"!! FML

#16293589
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73992) - you deserved it (3828)

On 05/22/2011 at 5:31am - misc - by quickfingers100 - United Kingdom

Today a little boy calld me on te pone crying "grandma did" in a broken voice!! I just didn't ave te eart to say "wrong number." FML

#15250352
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46109) - you deserved it (4208)

On 03/09/2011 at 10:47am - kids - by Waffle -



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