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LauraTheKiwi

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LauraTheKiwi

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 24 June 1987 (27 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3462
  • Number of comments : 82
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About LauraTheKiwi : HOLLAAAAAAAAAAAA:)

LauraTheKiwi's page activity

Visits<b>ilikeirony</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 9:58am<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 5:09am<b>rabbi1010</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 5:05pm<b>cryssycakesx3</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 12:56pm<b>nerdtron430</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 2:55pm<b>MaltWarrior</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 6:39pm<b>AquanTheDragon</b> - the 12/03/2013 at 8:10pm<b>WeiXinLun</b> - the 10/25/2013 at 2:23pm<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 11:33am<b>KatieMajestic</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 4:17am<b>MickiJ</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 9:06pm<b>whiplash2289</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 11:14pm<b>ayway</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 10:47pm<b>jacc16</b> - the 03/13/2013 at 12:46am<b>alphatoomega</b> - the 02/18/2013 at 11:02am<b>clarepetty</b> - the 12/26/2012 at 12:25pm<b>roundnproud</b> - the 05/21/2012 at 8:04am<b>Mornai</b> - the 09/12/2011 at 8:11am

LauraTheKiwi's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

LauraTheKiwi's favorite FMLs

Today, I was typing up a love letter on my computer. A sexual love letter. I was in a classroom, I'm the teacher, I'm gay, and my love letter showed up on the tv screen while my 7th grade students were taking a test. It was up on the screen for 15 minutes. FML

#168595
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70558) - you deserved it (279214)

On 03/01/2009 at 4:08am - intimacy - by Sad (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. About halfway through he went really quiet and started breathing heavily. I thought he was about to climax until I discovered he had fallen asleep. FML

#150928
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60373) - you deserved it (13899)

On 02/27/2009 at 3:39am - intimacy - by facepalm (woman) - Singapore

Today, while babysitting, the oldest little girl who is 7 went through my purse. She pulled out a half empty bottle of lube. She asked what it was and I told her lotion. I went to the bathroom and when I came out, the bottle was empty and there were 4 kids covered in lube. Then their mom came home. FML

#142269
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41011) - you deserved it (24737)

On 02/26/2009 at 11:08am - kids - by iailwkrb (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was riding the train and fell asleep. A friend of mine got on a few stops later, and to be funny, shouted 'BOO!'. I woke up and was so startled I peed myself. FML

#90535
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39561) - you deserved it (6060)

On 02/20/2009 at 6:13pm - misc - by niabby - United States (Illinois)

Today, in school my shoulder was killing me from a softball injury. I went to the nurse's office and asked "Can I have some ice?" They responded with "Why, what happened to your face?" FML

#75712
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43078) - you deserved it (2483)

On 02/19/2009 at 2:09am - misc - by Offended (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
504 comments

I agree, your life sucks (231220) - you deserved it (81119)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was pulled over by a motorcycle cop for speeding in a 25 MPH zone. As the cop was walking towards my car, I flicked my cig-bud out of my window. So, the cop did me the pleasure of writing me two tickets instead of one. FML

#51182
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10936) - you deserved it (152510)

On 02/16/2009 at 1:52am - misc - by Dani_Rich - United States (California)

Today, I stood by the wall at a party while everyone else danced and ignored me. It was my birthday party. FML

#44996
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54417) - you deserved it (10163)

On 02/15/2009 at 12:44am - misc - by Noname - United States

Today, I was talking to my parents about feeling insecure with my "beach body" as Spring Break keeps getting closer and closer. My dad warned me by saying, "Don't wear a gray swimsuit. People will try to roll you back into the ocean". FML

#38789
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47428) - you deserved it (7730)

On 02/13/2009 at 7:15pm - misc - by Shamu (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I bit into my egg sandwich, and when I looked back into it, there were 5 long, gray, hairs leading from the sandwich into my mouth. FML

#37200
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41085) - you deserved it (3025)

On 02/13/2009 at 2:06pm - misc - by hhaannnnaahh (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I bit into my egg sandwich, and when I looked back into it, there were 5 long, gray, hairs leading from the sandwich into my mouth. FML

#37200
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41085) - you deserved it (3025)

On 02/13/2009 at 2:06pm - misc - by hhaannnnaahh (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, while in our communal showers in the highschool football locker room, I started to swing my penis around because it feels good and I was alone. Two minutes later the rest of the team hops into the shower with me. 30 dudes, one self-induced boner. FML

#21808
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10897) - you deserved it (68380)

On 02/10/2009 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by JLoistheBomb (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I went looking for a childhood doll - I remembered that my mum kept her in her bedside cabinet. I could see the doll at the back, but there was stuff in the way, so I reached in and took some of it out, only to find I was holding one of my mum's toys... a big black rubber cock. FML

#13590
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27159) - you deserved it (5908)

On 02/07/2009 at 4:16pm - misc - by J (woman) - United Kingdom (Stockport)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and accidentally called her Brad (one of my roomates name) when I came. Now her and her friends think i'm gay and my roomate Brad moved out. FML

#3435
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37579) - you deserved it (29560)

On 01/29/2009 at 4:44pm - intimacy - by GavinHosler - United States (Michigan)



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