LastFalseApology

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Offline (the 06/14/2015 at 1:13am)

LastFalseApology

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 448
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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LastFalseApology's page activity

Visits<b>potionowl</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 1:38am<b>stripes97</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 12:48am<b>zeropointnine</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 4:05pm<b>kingdomgirl123</b> - the 07/06/2013 at 2:37am<b>mikeramos</b> - the 06/18/2013 at 5:11pm<b>juwood</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 6:37pm<b>pataplop</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 5:47pm<b>bfsd42</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 3:23pm<b>agentmatty007</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 7:34am<b>PsychoticAsylum</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 3:58am<b>cuppycakeslove</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 3:03am<b>dead_insects</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 2:34am<b>yadanax</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 2:19am<b>raisingbears</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 2:09am<b>1992yoko</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 1:19am<b>HeLix_NaTion</b> - the 06/15/2013 at 11:55pm<b>saenz30</b> - the 06/15/2013 at 11:49pm

LastFalseApology's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of LastFalseApology's badges

LastFalseApology's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my driving test. I was really nervous, but I thought I did pretty well in the end. That is until I parked the car and looked to the examiner. He was visibly shaken. He said I'd passed, quickly filled in the paperwork and left. On the downside, my car still smells of his shart. FML

by for shite's sake / 01/17/2015 at 5:24pm / United Kingdom (Kirklees) / Transportation

Today, I asked out a girl that I've liked for a while. She thought I was joking and laughed, saying, "No. Have you met yourself?" FML

by SilverZephyr / 01/16/2015 at 7:49am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I learned that when a man in the row in front of you at a movie theater tells you to shut up, you shouldn't tell him to fuck off. He might be 6'4 with a short temper. FML

by whoops.. / 01/15/2015 at 10:15pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in a store when a child looked at me and said to his mother "look at that tall man!" His mother replied "he's an evil giant isn't he, darling?" I then mimed being an evil giant to make the kid laugh. His mother slapped me. FML

by cganon / 09/21/2010 at 8:44am / United Kingdom / Kids

Today, I was working at a hospital-level rest home. I was making the rounds when I noticed a woman was sitting in her (electric) wheelchair in the middle of the hall. Going closer I saw her battery was flat so I said "Uh-oh! Looks like you've died." She bawled her eyes out and said "Not yet." FML

by Anonymous / 09/09/2009 at 5:58am / New Zealand (Otago) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally got the courage to go up and ask out the girl I have loved for a couple of months now. After she said yes, I was over the moon and ran home to tell my roommate. The next day, I saw her making out with another man. When I confronted her, she said "Oh, you were serious yesterday?" FML

by lovesucks / 09/01/2009 at 8:52am / Australia (Western Australia) / Love

Today, I was at work. I'm a sign spinner. Lots of other employees shares stories of how they have been flashed by 18 year old hot chicks as they drive by. I got flashed by a 45 year old, 300lbs lady. FML

by spinner / 09/01/2009 at 7:44am / United States (Tennessee) / Work

Today, I told the guy I have been sort of dating that I want to connect emotionally before sleeping with him. He told me that he already had an emotional connection with his fiancée and was only interested in sleeping with me. FML

by MenSuck / 08/31/2009 at 11:56pm / United States (Florida) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I took my girlfriend to the movies. She's pretty conservative and I decided after four dates to give her her first ever kiss. As I leaned in she violently sneezed and hit me in the nose with the hand she brought up to cover her face. I broke my nose and got blood down her cleavage. FML

by SaMike / 08/31/2009 at 9:12pm / United States (South Dakota) / Love

Today, I was hanging out with a group of friends when I got into a conversation with this really attractive girl who I've liked for months. She asked me what school I go to. I sit to her left in biology. FML

by outofluckdude / 08/31/2009 at 8:40pm / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, I woke up to my five year old son picking off the scabs from his chicken pox and dropping them into my open mouth as I slept. FML

by beya / 08/31/2009 at 6:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I found some .pdf files on my wife's computer. They were forms that had been filled out except for the date and the "reason" section. They were divorce papers. When confronted about it she said, "Well, if you piss me off really bad, I want to write down why before I calm down." FML

by UNmarried / 08/31/2009 at 2:10pm / United States (South Carolina) / Love

Today, my friend got a babysitter for the kids and told me she was taking me to a party. My son told me his band was playing at a party. I will be 40 tomorrow, so I thought this would be the best surprise birthday party ever. It WAS a surprise birthday party – for a friend of ours. FML

by kelkline / 08/31/2009 at 12:45pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking a piss in a port-o-john and thought it would be a good idea to aim at a bee I saw buzzing around. The bee thought it would be a better idea to sting me on the knob. FML

by Bee / 08/31/2009 at 12:28pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was hurrying for the bus home from work. It was raining and I had my umbrella up. As I hurried by two women, I felt my umbrella hit one of them on the head. I turned to apologise and saw her standing with her hands on her newly bald head. My umbrella had lifted her wig off her head. FML

by Karen / 08/31/2009 at 10:48am / United Kingdom (London) / Transportation