LappDance

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Offline (the 10/10/2015 at 3:05am)

LappDance

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 13 May 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1157
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About LappDance : I'm one of a kind; just like everyone else.

5FDP, Alice in Chains, Papa Roach, Rise Against, A7X, The Offspring

LappDance's page activity

Visits<b>AllyJo1231</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 4:09pm<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 2:16pm<b>Kitty_Kat44</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 12:33am<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 9:42pm<b>bedforddanesss</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 1:38pm<b>orbit</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 11:48am<b>senbonzakuraa</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 9:54am<b>SingingWolf</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 1:45pm<b>ilovebadluck</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 12:54am<b>omggitshaley_</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 12:53am<b>Larissa24</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 1:41am<b>WubStep_</b> - the 03/11/2014 at 10:25pm<b>harrypotter955</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 12:34pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 12:05am<b>slippy327</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 2:35am<b>jillytc</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 9:25am<b>BrandonHammmmmy</b> - the 11/05/2013 at 1:29pm<b>hawkeyepeirce</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 10:13pm

Fucked!<b>AllyJo1231</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 10:09pm

LappDance's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of LappDance's badges

LappDance's favorite FMLs

Today, it's my mom's birthday. Got the perfect gift, the perfect card and of course the perfect cake. Well, it was the perfect cake until my dog's ass crushed it. FML

by Justified12 / 10/13/2014 at 10:15am / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while in my backyard, I had some insane gastric distress. I let out a fart so powerful that it made me yelp in pain, and left my asshole numb. A second later, I heard a cough come from over my neighbor's fence. I had to quietly limp back into my house in shame. FML

by soundslikeadumbcommentersituation / 07/11/2014 at 4:34pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, and for the past 38 weeks of my pregnancy, my husband decided to amuse himself by following me around, making whale noises. FML

by Anonymous / 03/01/2014 at 5:42am / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, while getting intimate with my boyfriend, he started sucking on my breast. He ended up popping a pimple on it into his mouth. He threw up and that, as they say, was the end of that. FML

by Anonymous / 02/18/2014 at 2:49pm / Virgin Islands, U.S. / Intimacy

Today, I ate some amazing homemade brownies that my best friend's wife made for us. She waited till I'd shoved a third one into my mouth before she mentioned she made them with breast milk. Knowing her, I don't even doubt it was true. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2014 at 3:36pm / United Kingdom (Fife) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized just how lonely I am when I tried to time my ejaculation to happen right as the new year started. FML

by Lonesome / 01/01/2014 at 1:41am / United States (Louisiana) / Intimacy

Today, I finally told my father that I was picked on at college all this year over my hearing disability. When I told him one of the jokes they made about me, he burst out into an uncontrollable fit of laughter. FML

by Anonymous / 12/20/2013 at 3:13pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, while working customer service, I instructed a customer to press the pound key on her cellphone. She hesitated a moment before asking, "Um, the pound key? You mean the hashtag, right?" FML

by #isthisthepoundkey? / 11/01/2013 at 12:49pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, my sister and her two-year-old came to my place for a visit. Not long after arriving, my niece ripped off her diaper and immediately took a dump on my white carpet. Guess who had to 'suddenly' leave afterwards, leaving me to clean up the mess. FML

by Anonymous / 09/22/2013 at 8:08pm / United States (North Carolina) / Kids

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

by Anonymous / 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm / Romania (Bucuresti) / Intimacy

Today, I was in the shower, oblivious to the outside world, when four police officers who had apparently been banging at my door, entered by force. They were doing a bust on a weed farm and got the wrong house. FML

by Anonymous / 07/30/2013 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

by anonymous / 07/17/2013 at 12:48am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, as a joke, my friends pushed me into the men's restroom and held the door shut. As I was trying to push the door open, I heard a voice behind me say, "Wow. Immaturity, huh?" I turned to find a guy taking a dump in one of the urinals. FML

by Anonymous / 07/01/2013 at 1:50am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandma's new dildo arrived in the mail. We buried her yesterday. FML

by hinting / 06/17/2013 at 12:43pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I attempted sexting for the first time. After about twenty minutes of Star Wars references, I gave up. FML

by Anonymous / 04/19/2013 at 1:14am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy