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Language_girl97

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Language_girl97

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 28 May 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3452
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Language_girl97's page activity

Visits<b>missathegirlwond</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 3:25am<b>stinkyslinky</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 12:00pm<b>therealjc</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 7:08am<b>LeDaniel</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 12:54am<b>katydid91</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 7:04am<b>AmexBlack</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 10:32pm<b>jcross01</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 11:12pm<b>ThatSlappinBass</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 9:12pm<b>regenerate</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 6:29pm<b>shaww</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 7:09pm<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 9:47pm<b>GreenBeast</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 1:22pm<b>aine500</b> - the 02/12/2014 at 4:22pm<b>ticia002</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 5:34pm<b>Ashamed_Sister</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 1:45pm<b>music8484</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 3:55pm<b>Everyday_Galaxy</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 6:07pm<b>gigidance</b> - the 06/29/2013 at 10:25pm

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Language_girl97's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my husband that a guy I work with told me that I'm the most beautiful woman he has ever met. My husband replied, "He needs to get out more." FML

Today, I found out that what my husband meant by "we should try swinging" is "I really want to have sex with this one friend of yours, and if you so much as make eye contact with any guy I'm going to totally flip out and threaten to kill him and you." FML

#20560730
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49046) - you deserved it (6492)

On 03/26/2013 at 8:07am - intimacy - by SwinginSolo (woman) - United States

Today, whilst texting my boyfriend on the train, I noticed the woman sitting next to me staring intently at my phone. After letting my boyfriend know, he sent a message saying, "Are we gonna involve the dog again? Last night was fun." She gasped and screamed that I'm a "twisted dog-humping bitch." FML

#20560035
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38520) - you deserved it (6675)

On 03/25/2013 at 8:28pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, during a sex ed lesson, we were given a lecture on pregnancy and abortion from the school nurse. Throughout the session she kept repeating, "Of course, Sophie knows ALL about this." The nurse happens to know that my dad's a gynaecologist. That's not what everyone else in the year thinks. FML

#20559804
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41597) - you deserved it (2471)

On 03/25/2013 at 5:53pm - misc - by Soph (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I was freshening up my makeup in the car before a date. An old lady walked by and said through my open window, "Don't bother. There's no helping you, honey." FML

#20559530
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38536) - you deserved it (4118)

On 03/25/2013 at 2:36pm - love - by f-ugly - United States

Today, I was at my job, waiting tables. A fellow server and myself were given a party of 14 Bible thumpers. They left us $9.00 and a mini Bible after awesome service, telling us we did a great job. Unfortunately, Religion doesn't pay my car payment. FML

#20559101
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33199) - you deserved it (5815)

On 03/25/2013 at 4:48am - money - by PrayingForMoney - United States (California)

Today, my family and I were visiting an aunt. While helping my aunt to set the table, my sister remarked that from behind I look exactly like her. I reflexively blurted out "well fuck you too". Very awkward silence. FML

#20557009
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12074) - you deserved it (37237)

On 03/23/2013 at 8:38pm - misc - by Kjer (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, after I had changed my number to get away from my abusive ex, my mom decided to give him my new one. She insists that I need to give him another chance. FML

#20556707
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50595) - you deserved it (3065)

On 03/23/2013 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my psycho abstinence-only sex ed teacher claimed condoms give 50% protection at most against pregnancy. I couldn't help but correct her. She apologized for her "mistake", saying, "It's just that we're not ALL sluts, Kara." Now everyone thinks I'm a raging whore. FML

#20555528
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40919) - you deserved it (6079)

On 03/22/2013 at 8:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, on Facebook, I mentioned that I'd just finished reading the novel Pet Sematary. Two hours later, I'd lost two friends and my boyfriend, after they commented "learn to spell, dumbass", "u illiterate fucker", and "well, I'm not dating you for your brains, am I?" I hate humanity. FML

#20555478
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32574) - you deserved it (7215)

On 03/22/2013 at 8:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out my mom thought I was a lesbian because I dated a girl in high school. I didn't date anyone in high school. Apparently, guys never asked me out because my best friend told everyone that I was her girlfriend. I had a two-year lesbian relationship that I never knew about. FML

#20554170
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47437) - you deserved it (3172)

On 03/21/2013 at 8:35pm - love - by SmallAngel (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I learned that if not for my grandfather gifting my dad $200, I would have been named Anthrax. FML

#20552804
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31420) - you deserved it (2455)

On 03/20/2013 at 9:11pm - misc - by cheeseburglar_9000 (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I tossed half a sausage to a dog sitting beside a park bench. It wasn't until he lunged for it and dragged the man beside him off of the bench that I realized it was a seeing eye dog. FML

#20552676
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30113) - you deserved it (23779)

On 03/20/2013 at 7:53pm - animals - by SolaceInRage (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I walked into an exam after having stayed up 20 straight hours studying. The professor looked at me and muttered, "Don't bother, I'm failing you either way." FML

#20552400
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41193) - you deserved it (4819)

On 03/20/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Tired (man) - United States

Today, for the sixth time in a row, I was driving my kid to school and he made me late for work. Why? He was whacking off instead of getting ready. FML

#20551973
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43745) - you deserved it (6097)

On 03/20/2013 at 7:07am - intimacy - by Why son, why? (man) - United States



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