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Language_girl97

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Language_girl97

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 28 May 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3455
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Language_girl97's page activity

Visits<b>missathegirlwond</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 3:25am<b>stinkyslinky</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 12:00pm<b>therealjc</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 7:08am<b>LeDaniel</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 12:54am<b>katydid91</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 7:04am<b>AmexBlack</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 10:32pm<b>jcross01</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 11:12pm<b>ThatSlappinBass</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 9:12pm<b>regenerate</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 6:29pm<b>shaww</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 7:09pm<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 9:47pm<b>GreenBeast</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 1:22pm<b>aine500</b> - the 02/12/2014 at 4:22pm<b>ticia002</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 5:34pm<b>Ashamed_Sister</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 1:45pm<b>music8484</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 3:55pm<b>Everyday_Galaxy</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 6:07pm<b>gigidance</b> - the 06/29/2013 at 10:25pm

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Language_girl97's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend told me he had just robbed a bank and needed a place to hide. Thinking he was joking, I let him in so we could hang out. 15 minutes later, the cops storm into my apartment. Now I'm an accomplice in a crime I thought was a joke. FML

#20718656
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58138) - you deserved it (16057)

On 06/10/2013 at 11:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to the local pharmacy to buy some condoms. When I went to go purchase them, the elderly lady behind the counter took one look at me and said, "Honey, you're your own birth control." FML

#20715175
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56972) - you deserved it (9863)

On 06/09/2013 at 10:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, at the gym, my boobs were jiggling more than the girl next to me. This would be a good thing, if I wasn't a guy. FML

#20712866
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47870) - you deserved it (15441)

On 06/08/2013 at 12:42am - health - by random - United States (Texas)

Today, I got mugged on the way to my 21st birthday party at a bar. I begged the thug to at least throw me my ID, only to have him laugh and run away singing "happy birthday". FML

#20711068
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55912) - you deserved it (3530)

On 06/07/2013 at 1:14am - money - by ididntevendrinkthatnight - United States (New York)

Today, the crazy son of a bitch who lives next door to me once again got into a loud, rather one-sided argument with his cat. 20 minutes later, he knocked on my door, asking if he could stay at my place for a couple of days. The look he gave me when I said no has me fearing for my life. FML

#20708003
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53375) - you deserved it (4047)

On 06/05/2013 at 6:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I let my step-father know exactly what I thought of him. After a few moments of awkward silence, he leaned towards me and quietly whispered, "Well you're adopted. Your parents never loved you." FML

#20707377
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53896) - you deserved it (13414)

On 06/05/2013 at 11:24am - misc - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States

Today, I found my husband farting on my pillows, bare ass. His only words were, "This isn't what it looks like." FML

#20707362
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50980) - you deserved it (4688)

On 06/05/2013 at 11:08am - misc - by Thanks Honey (woman) - United States

Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML

#20701323
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68085) - you deserved it (4153)

On 06/02/2013 at 2:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I found shit on my windshield. I'm not sure if it is human or animal, but it was conveniently smeared all over and even more was placed under my wipers just in case I used them to clean it up. This isn't the first time, and I have no idea who I could have pissed off. FML

#20694826
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47084) - you deserved it (3971)

On 05/30/2013 at 5:41am - misc - by windshitwipers (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I confessed to my girlfriend that I cheated on her. She told me that she needed time to think, and left. An hour later, her dad came by with a baseball bat. FML

#20691094
350 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25563) - you deserved it (129342)

On 05/28/2013 at 12:51pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, while at the movies, I had an uncomfortable amount of gas that I couldn't hold in any longer. I waited for a loud part in the movie to conceal it and took my chance. Problem was, the loud part ended abruptly. I didn't. FML

Today, a package was delivered to my house, addressed to me, clearly marked "sexual health products". Inside were condoms, birth control pills, and an invoice made out to me. My parents went ballistic and grounded me. Whoever staged this "hilarious" prank: well played, asshole. FML

#20684142
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67223) - you deserved it (5634)

On 05/24/2013 at 5:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Iceland (Eyjafjardarsysla)

Today, my extremely religious father visited for a family dinner. My daughter had just one job: not to set him off on one of his easily-provoked rants. She nonetheless decided to take a photo in the middle of prayer, because she just HAD to Instagram her food. My father went apeshit. FML

#20683669
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49169) - you deserved it (8930)

On 05/24/2013 at 12:40pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Brazil (Rio de Janeiro)

Today, whilst driving past a cyclist, I thought it would be funny to make him jump by blasting my horn right behind him and then driving off. I guess he thought it would be funny to catch up with me, yank off my wing-mirror, and hurl it through the open window at my face. FML

Today, the couch I bought a week ago was delivered. I don't know which is worse: my son being the one to point out it's been "used", or that he used a black light to prove it. FML

#20672414
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48423) - you deserved it (4425)

On 05/19/2013 at 3:35am - kids - by disappointed dad - United States



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