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Language_girl97

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Language_girl97
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 28 May 1997 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 1603
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Language_girl97's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized the senior thesis I turned in last week uses the word "asses" instead of "assess" 17 times. FML

#1423979
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18584) - you deserved it (54641)

On 04/28/2009 at 2:47pm - misc - by fuckspellcheck (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I walked into the ladies restroom and was shocked to see the guy I've had a huge crush on for two years. Peeing. In the sink. FML

#1413224
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52513) - you deserved it (4797)

On 04/28/2009 at 1:40am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was giving my crush a lift home from a mutual friend's house. When he got in the car, my mom asked in French, "Is this the guy you won't stop talking about? You can do so much better!" Of all the things I've told about him to my mom, I forgot to mention he's French as well. FML

#1380025
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50626) - you deserved it (10188)

On 04/27/2009 at 12:43am - love - by frenchgirlll (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I told my morbidly obese teacher that he had mustard on his chin. He tried to wipe it off and I said without thinking "No, your other chin." FML

#1183815
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34184) - you deserved it (90461)

On 04/21/2009 at 1:42am - misc - by anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got T-boned by a woman going 60 mph. I was unconscious for hours while a tube was inserted into my collapsed lung. Upon waking up my 16-year old brother thought it would be hilarious to yank out my leg hairs. FML

#1144667
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70218) - you deserved it (2303)

On 04/20/2009 at 1:53am - health - by robinhoood (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was at a ballet recital with my friend, sitting between her and the mother of the head male ballerina. When he came on stage in obscenely tight white tights I whispered to my friend, "You can see his whole freaking package!" I'd whispered to the wrong side. FML

#1052920
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10450) - you deserved it (56662)

On 04/17/2009 at 11:19am - misc - by lalalohan (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I finally hooked up with a guy I've been hanging out with for 2 months. Afterwards, while we're getting dressed he says "You better be clean. If you're not tell me now so I dont pass it on to my girlfriend." Stunned, all I could say was, "Girlfriend?!" His reply, "Well technically my fiancée." FML

#992330
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66870) - you deserved it (11704)

On 04/15/2009 at 2:42pm - misc - by oops123 - United States (Missouri)

Today, I got 20% tints on my car. As I'm driving home, a cop pulls me over. I didn't want to ruin my new tint by opening my window, so I opened my door as the cop approached. He then pulled out his gun and yelled "GET ON THE FUCKING GROUND!" before I could explain. FML

#952639
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36585) - you deserved it (50856)

On 04/13/2009 at 3:41pm - misc - by italy1986 (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I got a haircut for the first time in almost a year. I thought it looked really nice and made me look good. On my way to CVS, I ran into one of my friends. He examined me and said, "You look... like a crack whore." FML

#919205
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39600) - you deserved it (4697)

On 04/11/2009 at 9:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my friends and I saw a movie. We sat in the balcony. Halfway during the movie we heard a commotion, thinking it was a group of unruly teenagers like us, we began to pelt the lower half of the theater with candy. We later learned that it was a man having a heart attack. FML

#844380
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7977) - you deserved it (71898)

On 04/06/2009 at 10:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
908 comments

I agree, your life sucks (329583) - you deserved it (35717)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was riding my bike and stopped at a street light. A little girl looked at me, then asked her mother, "Mommy, why does that girl have a ring through her nose?" Her mother then replied, "Because her parents don't love her." FML

#818828
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62193) - you deserved it (16982)

On 04/05/2009 at 3:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my siblings came home for the weekend. At dinner, my dad started complaining at how one of my siblings had gotten fired, one was failing college, and the other was gay. He went on to say I was 17 and already had a bright future. I'm pregnant. FML

#792212
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41877) - you deserved it (48319)

On 04/03/2009 at 10:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I left the iron and ironing board in my room. While I was at school, my mom decided to do some ironing, and did it in my room for convenience. The iron needed water, so she took a water bottle from my dresser and poured it in. It was my secret vodka stash, and the iron caught on fire. FML

#782957
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20070) - you deserved it (68365)

On 04/03/2009 at 2:13pm - misc - by healey16 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got on an elevator with a woman and her child. I was the first one on. When she stepped on, the capacity alarm went off. As she left she told her daughter that's why fat people shouldn't be allowed in public. I'm 145 lbs. She was twice my size. I got called fat by a hippopotamus. FML

#721846
306 comments

I agree, your life sucks (159390) - you deserved it (9656)

On 03/31/2009 at 10:17am - health - by warp_routine (woman) - United States (Vermont)



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