Lacist

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Offline (the 08/26/2014 at 11:41pm)

Lacist

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2693
  • Number of comments : 149
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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Lacist's page activity

Visits<b>TheGamingGamer</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 2:22pm<b>justindrew14</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 4:39pm<b>Dalboz</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 11:34pm<b>SnowxSakura</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 12:13pm<b>Meriwether</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 10:15am<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 10:22am<b>niceguy123</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 3:38pm<b>kianabanannna</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 1:50pm<b>GreyJedi</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 11:10am<b>pharaohasphuck</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 3:23am<b>reillyg11</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 11:52pm<b>FenHarel</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 2:37pm<b>llsuperlilyll</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 12:20am<b>mzrayray</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 2:49am<b>sleepyfires</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 12:04am<b>Nicolasaur726</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 10:43am<b>Deluxe_1</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 10:21pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 3:17pm

Fucked!<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 4:23pm

Lacist's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of Lacist's badges

Lacist's favorite FMLs

Today, my naked boyfriend walked up to me with my towel around his neck and with a hard-on, then declared he was "The Penis Man" and slapped me with his junk. I thought I was dating a man, not a man-child. FML

by peniswoman / 07/14/2013 at 1:03pm / United Kingdom (Renfrewshire) / Intimacy

Today, my driving instructor failed me on my test, because I forgot to turn the air conditioning off after parking. FML

by WOW / 07/13/2013 at 4:40pm / Kenya / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to a strange noise. I looked over to see my drunk husband standing at the dresser. I asked him what he was doing. "Peeing." I asked him, "In the sock drawer?" There was a pause. "Am I peeing in the wrong drawer?" FML

by speechless / 07/13/2013 at 10:32am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my daughter hugging and sobbing into her Edward Cullen cut-out. She won't tell me what's wrong, yet she can confide in a creepy fictional stalker whose facial expression is locked to "chronically constipated". Where did I go wrong? FML

by So little trust. / 07/12/2013 at 7:18pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, my mom got drunk and punched me in the nose, then yelled at me for bleeding on the carpet. FML

by ouch / 07/12/2013 at 3:22am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while leaving McDonald's, I threw a fry out the window to a flock of seagulls. I watched in the rear-view mirror as it landed in the opposite lane and about 60 winged rats descended upon the street, causing a truck to veer off the road and crash. FML

by John / 07/09/2013 at 10:48pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was verbally abused by a customer because her entrée was too fishy. I'm not the chef, just the waiter and I work at a fish grill. FML

by NathanA / 07/08/2013 at 7:54pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, my dog decided to poop while inside a revolving door. Before I could do anything, the door swung around and smeared it everywhere. My dog excels at timing. FML

by PerfectTiming / 07/08/2013 at 7:19am / Netherlands (Noord-Brabant) / Animals

Today, I politely asked a man to not sleep on a tram stop that I had to clean. He got up, and while I leaned forward to pick up some trash from the ground nearby, I felt a warm stream on my back. Now I can't get the smell of urine off my clothes. FML

by FUCK.THIS.JOB. / 07/08/2013 at 1:57am / Finland (Southern Finland) / Work

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

by nosestealer / 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I was going to fight the guy who my girlfriend left me for. While waiting at the park, he sent me a video of the two of them having sex on my bed. FML

by SimG / 07/07/2013 at 8:35am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I was asked to help my sister clean her room. The moment I opened the door, I was greeted by her screaming "TASTE THE RAINBOW" with a full mouth. She then spat the skittles into my face. FML

by tastetherainbow / 07/07/2013 at 6:55am / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend and I went to my parents' barbecue. He knew my family is extremely religious, so what did he do? Called for silence to make an announcement, namely: "God isn't real." Cue a riot that ended in us being kicked out and me all but disowned for "putting him up to it". FML

by he's a dawk, and a cunt / 07/05/2013 at 6:29pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my seven-year-old son put a spider in the microwave. Animal cruelty? No. The goal was to irradiate it, then get it to bite him so that he would become Spider-Man. FML

by SpiderFather / 07/02/2013 at 4:01am / France / Kids

Today, I was delivering pizza. When I went up to the front door, an elderly lady answered. She was wearing a floral dress that went down to her shins and had a Nicolas Cage mask on with eye holes cut out. When I glanced behind her, I saw her cats had them too. FML

by nicholascageonyourface / 06/09/2013 at 1:13am / United States (Nebraska) / Miscellaneous