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Lacalema

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Lacalema

5Fucked!

LacalemaLacalema
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1168
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Lacalema : 42!!


If I commented, I was drunk. I'm way to shy to say anything sober.


It looks like I'm a profile stalker but really I just click to see a big version of your picture. I only use the app.

Lacalema's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - yesterday at 3:20pm<b>Weemo04</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 1:53pm<b>DerrickJames</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 12:02am<b>grogers311</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 8:29pm<b>AHzulu</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 4:58pm<b>GrinchFu1</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 2:36pm<b>radarsat</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 1:18am<b>thisguy22</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 9:06am<b>clairesucks</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 6:57am<b>JMichael</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 11:13am<b>EB90</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 3:38am<b>MitunaCaptor</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 10:08am<b>firecracker5</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 10:13pm<b>dezman2000</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 3:57am<b>legitseabass</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 12:18am<b>jtthegr8</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 4:31am<b>illegalbeagle69</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 3:57am<b>TheTardis123</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 8:15pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 2:18pm<b>AHzulu</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 10:58pm<b>clairesucks</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 12:58pm<b>irish_lad</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 11:03am<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 12:43pm

Lacalema's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of Lacalema's badges

Lacalema's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to explain to my dad how I rear-ended the car in front of me because of a particularly intense banjo solo. FML

#21461958
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11027) - you deserved it (16071)

On 08/29/2015 at 1:09am - misc - by mumfordandsonimdisappointed - United States

Today, my wife handed over most of our son's college fund, in cash, to an investment scammer going by the name "Herp A. Derpson". FML

#21453336
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27815) - you deserved it (3079)

On 08/08/2015 at 12:02am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my business got broken into and I lost a lot of valuable equipment. Although I have 24/7 security guards, they left in the middle of the burglary because they were too scared to stop the burglars or even to call the police. FML

#21449035
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27658) - you deserved it (2244)

On 07/29/2015 at 11:30am - money - by fukingtigans (man) - Croatia (Zadarska)

Today, the crush I've had for months finally came over to my place for the first time. It didn't last long however, as I suddenly had to go to the ER for severe testicular pain. FML

#21447538
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22657) - you deserved it (1930)

On 07/26/2015 at 1:55pm - love - by suosi (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my father passed away. I called my boss to let him know about the situation. His only response before hanging up: "Shit, dude. Well, I'll see you in the morning, these reports won't write themselves." FML

#21414400
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31402) - you deserved it (1675)

On 05/23/2015 at 10:50am - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my dad and grandpa came to a charity event that I helped set up for people who have autism. I appreciated their support, until I heard my dad say "Man, some of these 'tards are pretty hot." and my grandpa replying "Yeah. Probably like dead fish in bed, though." FML

#21316987
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34591) - you deserved it (2862)

On 12/13/2014 at 9:02pm - misc - by ashamed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found out that my cat, that I've had for 3 years, is actually my neighbor's missing cat. FML

#21212155
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50910) - you deserved it (6533)

On 07/17/2014 at 7:32pm - animals - by kittynapper - United States (Colorado)

Today, my wife bought a strap-on. I'm about fifty miles beyond terrified. FML

#21184387
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63613) - you deserved it (9057)

On 06/22/2014 at 4:34pm - intimacy - by possibly fucked (man) - Portugal (Lisboa)

Today, I woke up screaming like a little bitch. I'd been having a bizarre dream where I was having sex with Homer Simpson, when he suddenly had a heart attack and fell on me, crushing me to death. I think my brain needs a douching. FML

#21171240
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51843) - you deserved it (7841)

On 06/11/2014 at 6:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my wife got all excited when she saw the elevator we were in had a feature to make it go sideways. I didn't have the heart to tell her they were the buttons to open and close the door. FML

#21137819
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49032) - you deserved it (6355)

On 05/12/2014 at 3:41pm - misc - by Jarool - Canada (Alberta)

Today, at a grocery store, a man came up to me while I was picking out apples and whispered in my ear, "That's how Snow White died." FML

#20947922
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45104) - you deserved it (4108)

On 11/06/2013 at 4:16pm - misc - by awkward - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while at a private lake, my colon declared a state of evacuation. I ventured as far from my family as my sphincter would allow, only to make eye contact with two very horrified kayakers mid-explosion. FML

#20830594
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44635) - you deserved it (5182)

On 08/10/2013 at 11:23am - health - by Oh-Shit! - United States

Today, I was in the elevator, when a big bearded guy stepped in, wearing a dress. It's not an uncommon sight where I live, but my friend cracked up and asked him if he was wearing underwear. He took it as a challenge, and I can safely say that no, he was not. FML

#20452044
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39080) - you deserved it (6419)

On 01/10/2013 at 3:52pm - intimacy - by juvenile friends suck (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, my neighbor went on vacation, leaving me in charge of his cat and dog. For some reason, he calls his dog "Cat" and his cat "Dog". There are two pet food containers, one labeled "Cat" and the other labeled "Dog". I have no idea which one goes to which animal. FML

#20437796
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40051) - you deserved it (4216)

On 01/02/2013 at 1:07am - animals - by catdog - United States (California)

Today, at a Christmas party, my crush came up to me and cutely pointed out that I was standing under mistletoe. The only response my stupid brain could think of was, "Probably full of nargles though." He gave me a confused look and walked away. FML

#20402533
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27444) - you deserved it (12945)

On 12/16/2012 at 6:51pm - love - by Rhine (woman) - Barbados (Saint Michael)



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