LMFAOwned

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LMFAOwned

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1606
  • Number of comments : 188
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About LMFAOwned : Hello. You're here either because I said something provocative of exploration into the depths of my profile, or you liked my picture. Most likely the latter. Just kidding. As you can see, I like jokes. And YOUR MOM.Just kidding. Oh, there I go again.. You best run along before I try to make another joke. Oops, you stayed and you're still reading... "Why was the Energizer Bunny arrested? Because he was charged with battery!" Ha! Giggity.

LMFAOwned's page activity

Visits<b>CliffPaul</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 8:47am<b>jeromemweil</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 12:29am<b>cj89898</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 1:08pm<b>AdamPractical</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 2:55pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 4:02pm<b>redstone7693</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 10:58pm<b>ItsAlly</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 9:00pm<b>shmoooopie</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 4:32pm<b>_jack117_</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 9:22am<b>soveryunoriginal</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 4:15pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 2:16pm<b>kittykat1501</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 4:01pm<b>A7X_all_the_way</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 3:49am<b>Deluxe_1</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 10:58pm<b>FYLTHOUGH</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 1:49pm<b>jonathan7777</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 4:01pm<b>lolalove24</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 9:05am<b>codyflanders2008</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 1:41am

Fucked!<b>eski2015</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 8:16pm

LMFAOwned's FML badges

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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LMFAOwned's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking at engagement rings. When the store owner asked about our budget, my boyfriend said with a straight face, "Nothing too expensive, I have a big penis so I don't have to overcompensate by buying a big diamond." FML

by NewlyDread / 02/05/2013 at 9:31pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, my hubby asked for a morning blow job, and I happily obliged. All was going great until he came and farted at the same time. I laughed and reassured him it was no big deal. He cried. FML

by airbiscuit / 01/21/2013 at 7:36am / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Intimacy

Today, someone broke into my car by smashing the driver's side window. I'd be less irritated if they had just used the door handle; the lock has been broken for years. FML

by Perplexed / 01/19/2013 at 8:14am / United States (South Dakota) / Money

Today, I married the woman I love. I wasn't the groom, I was the minister. FML

by Pr unlucky / 10/02/2010 at 4:07am / Australia (Western Australia) / Love

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he wanted to make the most of his 1 month X-Box Live coupon. FML

by Single / 08/07/2010 at 7:01am / France (Bretagne) / Love

Today, upon getting out of the shower, I discovered the towel I grabbed off the rack had dried poop on it. Apparently, during my sister's birthday party yesterday, we'd run out of toilet paper. FML

by missalexa / 08/03/2010 at 2:13pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband told me "The only reason I stay with you is because it's cheaper than paying child support." FML

by Tree / 07/30/2010 at 7:34am / Love

Today, I was walking down the street and spotted a man who was about 6 and a half feet tall passing by me. As he passed me, I turned and asked him "How's the weather up there?" He then turned around, spat on me, and replied "Raining." FML

by spriggs / 07/25/2010 at 5:06am / United States (California) / Health

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because she said I was more of a woman than she was. I yelled out, "I HATE YOU!" and started to cry. She then took a tampon out of her purse, handed it to me, laughed, and walked away. FML

by GirlishMan1883897 / 07/24/2010 at 6:53am / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, my boyfriend of three months texted me saying he loves me. I excitedly started texting back, "I love you too." Before I even got done, he messaged again saying, "Can you send a pic of your tits to me now?" FML

by luvlessbootycall / 07/24/2010 at 1:23am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, while getting a lump in my private region examined by a very cute nurse, I got a massive erection. The smartest thing I could think to say at the time to her was: "I haven't been touched there in a very long time." FML

by Anonymous / 07/22/2010 at 8:39pm / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML

by Wawawiwa / 07/21/2010 at 7:44pm / Namibia (Windhoek) / Intimacy

Today, I drew a face on a balloon and pretended to make out with it. The balloon popped and shot to the back of my throat, where it got caught. FML

by jazthefish / 07/12/2010 at 3:42pm / United States (Illinois) / Health