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LEGATE_LANIUS

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LEGATE_LANIUS

7Fucked!

LEGATE_LANIUSLEGATE_LANIUS
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 2 March 1999 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 264
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 26 posted

About LEGATE_LANIUS : I'm the monster of the east, killing people like a beast

LEGATE_LANIUS's page activity

Visits<b>caaguilar</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 12:56pm<b>_Tater_Tot_</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 12:58am<b>LilyLi</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 7:46pm<b>WD_Stevens</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 1:46pm<b>IndicaPaincakes</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 2:43am<b>Metashock</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 9:24am<b>kingdomgirl123</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 1:49pm<b>russfml</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 1:09am<b>gg215</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 6:04pm<b>davie94</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 5:03pm<b>Lesser</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 12:22am<b>MattBenid</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 4:25pm<b>Sassy_Kitten96</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 7:01am<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 2:49am<b>Araj_Hs</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 12:00am<b>teapotrevolt</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 10:20am<b>oldmanringo</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 5:04pm<b>kylie31</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 4:07am

Fucked!<b>caaguilar</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 6:56pm<b>russfml</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 7:09am<b>Lesser</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 1:34am<b>davie94</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 4:45am<b>Araj_Hs</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 5:00am<b>teapotrevolt</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 4:20pm<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 5:46pm

LEGATE_LANIUS's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of LEGATE_LANIUS's badges

LEGATE_LANIUS's favorite FMLs

Today, I sneezed and ended up in the emergency room. How? Apparently the sneeze dislodged a kidney stone that is now slowly, painfully working its way from my kidney to my bladder so that I can piss it out. FML

Today, I was walking my dog. Suddenly, my insane neighbor who loves dogs a bit too much comes over and asks to pet my dog. I say OK, thinking that if I watch her, she won't do anything. I turn around to make sure no cars are coming and when I turn back, she's trying to steal my dog. FML

Today, I rode my new motorcycle to work for the first time. As I accelerated, I felt a sharp pain in my neck. Apparently, poisonous spiders can actually get trapped inside motorbike helmets. Duly noted. FML

Today, I accidentally farted in the middle of class. Thinking I got away with it, I just kept doing my work until some kid across the room says, "I could have done better." FML

#21224311
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36384) - you deserved it (6459)

On 07/29/2014 at 11:49pm - work - by dealtit - United States (Georgia)

Today, I saw the guy who helped me yesterday when I was lost by telling me which bus to take. He came up to me and asked me how it went. I told him that the bus went the exact opposite way I wanted to go. He laughed and said, "I know." FML

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a huge argument while driving home from visiting family. We pulled into a gas station, and I went inside to grab a drink and cool down. When I came back out, both car and boyfriend were nowhere in sight. It was my car. FML

Today, one of my online friends told me he's bought a plane ticket, so he can come visit me. I've told him multiple times before that I'm uncomfortable with this idea, but he keeps telling me to stop joking, and reminding me that he'll have no other place to stay. FML

Today, my house was broken into. After we called the police, my dad started calling himself Sherlock Holmes and talking in a British accent. He insists on calling me Watson. He is going around the neighborhood acting like Sherlock, investigating stuff. He won't stop. FML

Today, I left hospital after a three-night stay. Whilst waiting for my taxi to arrive, my mother called me in hysterics wanting to know where I was, because the police had called her and told her I had gone missing. Turns out my doctor "forgot" to tell anyone that I was discharged. FML

Today, I got back my history paper. The whole paper had been crossed out and at the end, my professor had written "Really?!" I still don't know what I did wrong. FML

Today, I found out why my cat hasn't been coming home for regular meals. Apparently, my elderly next door neighbour has forgotten that her cat is dead and puts food out for it every morning. My cat is exploiting her by impersonating her dead cat to get better food. My cat is an asshole. FML

#20110144
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29116) - you deserved it (4848)

On 10/10/2012 at 4:43am - animals - by assholecat (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found out my sister-in-law is getting married. She is one of my best friends, and was my maid of honor when I got married. She's asked me to serve punch at hers. FML

Today, my boyfriend of seven months and I were looking at some pictures on his iPad. I saw a picture of a kid of about two years old that looked a little like him. I jokingly said, "What, is that your son?" Imagine my surprise when he said that it was. FML

Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML

#19903364
319 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32134) - you deserved it (3816)

On 07/07/2012 at 2:10am - misc - by kalikanna - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was sent a letter by the vet, saying my cat was late for her yearly checkup. My cat died last week and I'd had her cremated by the same people who had sent the letter. FML

#19815411
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30689) - you deserved it (2271)

On 06/19/2012 at 10:15pm - animals - by jnr1234 - United States (New Jersey)



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