Kraft92

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Kraft92

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 5 May 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7278
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Kraft92 : I enjoy the little things in life. I believe in living every day with a smile. I enjoy working and being productive, if I'm not, then the day just seems wasted.

I'm an American Soldier.

MOS- Radio and Communications Security Repairer.
Rank - E3

Kraft92's page activity

Visits<b>fantasyE</b> - 19 hours ago<b>raven83</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 12:58am<b>risher01</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 9:29am<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 6:22pm<b>redstone7693</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 12:39am<b>HardOrphanMaker</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 10:47am<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 10:15am<b>str1kepa1n</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 9:32pm<b>rjc490</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 11:07pm<b>HerpaderpGlaze</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 5:50am<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 5:46pm<b>fuzzylumpkins19</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 9:49am<b>skyturtle</b> - the 07/25/2013 at 7:15pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 07/05/2013 at 7:24pm<b>alice_in_mordor</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 12:01pm<b>CanadianCutie22</b> - the 04/11/2013 at 8:01pm<b>kawaiichick</b> - the 01/10/2013 at 12:38am<b>sadistmonkey</b> - the 03/20/2012 at 1:52am

Fucked!<b>fantasyE</b> - 13 hours ago<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 4:16pm<b>HerpaderpGlaze</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 11:51am

Kraft92's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of Kraft92's badges

Kraft92's favorite FMLs

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

by lolilovemyboyfriend / 10/19/2011 at 10:37am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I came home from school to find almost every single personal possession and piece of furniture from my bedroom all laid out or disassembled in the back yard. My dad smugly told me I'd better start moving it all back. This is his revenge for me salting his coffee this morning. FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2011 at 9:48pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, while lying in bed with my boyfriend after some steamy lovemaking, he sat up, slapped my ass with excruciating force, and screamed, "I AM THE THUNDER!" directly into my ear. It seems our senses of humor differ considerably. FML

by myasshurts / 10/14/2011 at 7:03pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

by MLGreco / 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm / United States / Kids

Today, my students took my glasses, hid them from me, and called me a turtle when I squinted my eyes trying to look for them. This carried on for about 25 minutes. FML

by TurtleTeacher / 10/14/2011 at 2:09am / United States (Alaska) / Geek

Today, I awoke to rose petals leading me to the front garden. Curious, I followed them, thinking my boyfriend planned something romantic. As I walked out the door, I was hit in the face with a paper plate full of whipped cream and sprinkles, and then locked outside. FML

by Eet- / 10/13/2011 at 3:20pm / United Kingdom (Dorset) / Love

Today, I was talking with my uncle, when the subject of my abusive mother-in-law came up. He assured me he'd talk to her and straighten things out. Apparently this means posting on her Facebook wall threatening to "pimp-slap a bitch" if she doesn't get her "fat ass out of family business". FML

by ...... / 10/07/2011 at 10:40pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a man dancing to a Britney Spears song in his Volkswagen Beetle. I started laughing hysterically until he got out. He was huge. I was stuck in traffic. FML

by Anonymous / 10/06/2011 at 1:04pm / United States / Transportation

Today, while my boyfriend was asleep, I gave him a soft kiss and whispered how handsome and gentle he looked. His response, still asleep, was to roll over and let out a massive fart. FML

by Anonymous / 10/06/2011 at 11:23am / United States (Minnesota) / Love

Today, after reading about seduction techniques, I wore shades and a brightly colored shirt to a club to attract female attention. However, the sunglasses rendered me almost blind, and I tripped over a step, crashed into tables, and thanks to the shirt, everyone saw it happen in glorious technicolor. FML

by hardtoignore / 10/02/2011 at 9:34pm / United States (South Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home crying after my boyfriend dumped me for another girl. My dad told me to come tell him what was wrong. I sat down and let it all out, after which he looked up from his book, into my eyes, and gave me his loving advice: "Just cry about it and move on to another bastard." FML

by bastard magnet / 10/02/2011 at 6:14pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I called in sick to work for a second day. After months of my boss trying to get me sacked by spreading vicious rumors about me, taunting me into retaliating, and generally making my life a living hell, he finally got his chance. He sent me a text saying, "yeh dont bother son ure fuckin fired." FML

by sick of life / 09/23/2011 at 10:48am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, it was my first day as a police officer. A couple of hours into the shift, we got a call. A man was drunkenly jeering and urinating on parked cars. That man turned out to be my father. FML

by PC Jones / 09/20/2011 at 10:56am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, I caught my boyfriend of two years cheating on me. Instead of the usual excuses, he panicked and claimed he was my boyfriend's long-lost twin brother. He even tried to put on a fake accent. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2011 at 10:26am / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. His response was, "Thank god, finally." FML

by Cora / 09/16/2011 at 10:10am / United States / Love