Kraft92

Search for a member

Kraft92

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 5 May 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7242
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Kraft92 : I enjoy the little things in life. I believe in living every day with a smile. I enjoy working and being productive, if I'm not, then the day just seems wasted.

I'm an American Soldier.

MOS- Radio and Communications Security Repairer.
Rank - E3

Kraft92's page activity

Visits<b>raven83</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 12:58am<b>risher01</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 9:29am<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 6:22pm<b>redstone7693</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 12:39am<b>HardOrphanMaker</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 10:47am<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 10:15am<b>str1kepa1n</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 9:32pm<b>rjc490</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 11:07pm<b>HerpaderpGlaze</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 5:50am<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 5:46pm<b>fuzzylumpkins19</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 9:49am<b>skyturtle</b> - the 07/25/2013 at 7:15pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 07/05/2013 at 7:24pm<b>alice_in_mordor</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 12:01pm<b>CanadianCutie22</b> - the 04/11/2013 at 8:01pm<b>kawaiichick</b> - the 01/10/2013 at 12:38am<b>sadistmonkey</b> - the 03/20/2012 at 1:52am<b>ThecomingofTan</b> - the 01/06/2012 at 1:23pm

Fucked!<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 4:16pm<b>HerpaderpGlaze</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 11:51am

Kraft92's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of Kraft92's badges

Kraft92's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my girlfriend why she never lets me in her house. She stared blankly and said, "What is inside is not for thine eyes." I told her best friend about this creepiness later on. She sighed and said, "T'was not for mine eyes either. I didst fail to listen." I feel like I'm losing my mind here. FML

by amidreaming?? / 06/11/2012 at 5:45pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Love

Today, I overheard my boss and a co-worker talking about me. Apparently when I speak, I slur my words so badly that it sounds like I'm speaking in tongues. According to my boss, "he could be possessed by a demon right now, and we'd never even notice." FML

by bronieswillrule5eva / 06/11/2012 at 2:16pm / Canada (Prince Edward Island) / Work

Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML

by ultraattitude / 04/22/2012 at 3:01am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while landscaping my backyard, I was pulling a big weed out of the ground. After the last tug, the soil came free, but ended up with me punching myself full force in the nuts. I think my future children are already filing for parental abuse. FML

by JurassicHole / 04/21/2012 at 11:27pm / United States / Health

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

by Anonymous / 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I was Skyping with this kid, when his girlfriend started arguing with him. They do this every other week, and there was a bet on when they'd finally break up. I egged the guy on and told him not to take her shit. She ended up dumping him. Now I feel like an asshole, and all for a lousy $20. FML

by c*nt / 04/13/2012 at 7:14pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I was at a party, when the cops busted us. Since I'm underage, I hid behind a chair for an hour and a half while they breathalyzed everyone and sat them in the same room I was in. The cops left, everyone realized I was behind the chair, and now my nickname is "Anne Frank". FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2012 at 2:31pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my first meeting at the university women's group, excited to become a more involved feminist. The first item on the meeting's agenda? The upcoming bake sale. FML

by feminismlol / 04/06/2012 at 12:45am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up in jail charged with a DWI. I wasn't drinking last night and the only thing I remember is taking my prescription sleep medicine and lying down. FML

by Anonymous / 03/25/2012 at 9:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend drove to my house to break up with me. He only did so after I'd vacuumed the whole house to compensate for his cat allergies. I thought he was just coming to dinner. FML

by Ima in Hungary / 03/22/2012 at 8:06am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I washed my sheets. They wouldn't dry quick enough, so I had to use my old Buzz Lightyear sheets. My new girlfriend took it upon herself to become a damn psychic and pay me a surprise visit right there and then. FML

by babysheets / 03/17/2012 at 12:22pm / Uruguay (Montevideo) / Love

Today, I washed my sheets. They wouldn't dry quick enough, so I had to use my old Buzz Lightyear sheets. My new girlfriend took it upon herself to become a damn psychic and pay me a surprise visit right there and then. FML

by babysheets / 03/17/2012 at 12:22pm / Uruguay (Montevideo) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML

by Anonymous / 03/16/2012 at 4:23pm / Ireland / Intimacy

Today, a guy came by my house and demanded my fiancé come out and fight. He explained that my fiancé had been stupid enough to not only troll on a local interest forum, but to leave his name and our address, inviting people to "come shut me up if you think you're tough enough." FML

by me / 03/11/2012 at 10:49pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend decided he is going to narrate everything I do. I can't get him to stop. FML

by types / 03/02/2012 at 10:01am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous