KokiriKid

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KokiriKid

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2418
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

About KokiriKid : I'm not a nice person so don't expect my comments to signify otherwise.

KokiriKid's page activity

Visits<b>gr4ce_gr4ce</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 1:59pm<b>Covenant74</b> - the 04/01/2013 at 6:01am<b>Dracoboxer357</b> - the 09/22/2012 at 5:41pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 09/04/2012 at 11:09pm

KokiriKid's FML badges

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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KokiriKid's favorite FMLs

Today, I was broken up with via a cereal analogy. Apparently, I'm a Cheerio and all he wants is a Fruit Loop. FML

by Kyley / 05/08/2012 at 7:55am / United States / Love

Today, I was at a restaurant, and I saw my friend. When we made eye contact, I made a creepy face at her and twitched my arms to make her laugh. A woman looked over said sadly, "Oh my God, that poor girl!" She thought I was "special." FML

by thatswhatsup66 / 03/20/2012 at 3:01pm / United States (South Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up on my dad while he was rummaging through his briefcase. He must have heard me, because the moment I got up close, he whirled around and yelled "BOO!" causing me to scream like a little bitch. FML

by gengiskarn69 / 03/12/2012 at 10:55am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was shopping for tampons when a cute guy came over and gave me his number. He said, "Call me in 3 to 5 days." FML

by Tristansefam1367 / 03/12/2012 at 9:11am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking to my girlfriend over Skype. I said I loved her and hoped we would be together forever. She responded by singing Who Wants to Live Forever into her mic. FML

by callen5 / 03/10/2012 at 10:16am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I was humming the Star Wars theme song while on the bus. When my stop came I walked down the aisle only to hear a girl mutter, "The virginity is strong in this one." She's right. FML

by starboy / 03/10/2012 at 1:50am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I angrily tweeted about having fruitlessly searched for over an hour for my car keys. Minutes later, some guy told me to check beneath the "stack of skid-marked underwear" on my bedroom floor. I'm not sure if it was a lucky guess, or if I should start carrying mace. FML

by skid kid / 03/09/2012 at 9:09pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, I had to patiently listen as a customer nattered on and on about how incompetent I was for not stocking the movie she was looking for. It took nearly 20 minutes to get her to calm down long enough for me to explain that there is no such movie as "Hobbits With Shotguns". FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2012 at 5:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went with my friends to see a movie. I handed my student card over to the cashier as proof I was old enough to see it, and he started laughing hysterically at my picture. Then he called over a colleague, who also started laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 03/07/2012 at 1:51pm / United Kingdom (Lincolnshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was cooking and I burned my thumb. I had some first-aid burn spray, so I sprayed it on. I went outside to smoke a cigarette, and when I flicked my lighter, my thumb went up in flames. Turns out that first-aid burn spray is flammable. FML

by Anonymous / 03/07/2012 at 1:29am / United States / Health

Today, I was fired from my job. My boss claimed it was because I smelled like alcohol, never mind the fact that my job was brew master at a beer company. FML

by sdk2010 / 03/06/2012 at 12:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I choked on a gummy bear and ended up in the emergency room. The first thing the doctor said to me was, "Well, that must have been 'beary' uncomfortable." The entire room burst into laughter. FML

by Kayla / 03/05/2012 at 7:43pm / United States / Health

Today, I was suffering from a persistant, irritating itch on my butthole. Worried, I took a picture with my iPhone to get an idea of what was causing said itch. I never found the source, but my Mum and grandmother did, on the iPad. Thanks, Photo Stream. FML

by Buttscratcher / 03/03/2012 at 11:12am / United Kingdom / Health

Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML

by scaredshitless / 03/03/2012 at 8:55am / Finland (Southern Finland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend told me how she crept out last night to hook up with her boyfriend. At one point, she said she "snack" out, so I corrected her by saying it's "snuck". My boyfriend snorted, showed us in a dictionary that it's actually "sneaked" and called us "fucking idiots". FML

by argh / 03/02/2012 at 7:14pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous