Knock_Out

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Knock_Out

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 491
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Knock_Out : I am a smart, nice guy who knows a lot of stuff, ranging from small repairs to completely random facts. I am a nerd, but I am a cool nerd, not one who is extremely lame (you don't see those every day...or ever...).

Knock_Out's page activity

Visits<b>tubagurlluvsyou</b> - the 10/29/2012 at 10:31am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:39pm<b>awesomechica1229</b> - the 05/10/2011 at 7:57pm<b>misspuddy99</b> - the 03/09/2011 at 10:03pm<b>IHateDumbExs</b> - the 01/23/2011 at 12:40pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 2:35pm

Knock_Out's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Knock_Out's favorite FMLs

Today, I was spending Saint Patrick's Day with my girlfriend, when she started pinching me for not wearing green. To my complete shock, when she pinched my nipple, I got the biggest, most noticeable erection I've ever had in my life, and no matter what I did, it wouldn't go away. We were in public. FML

by Mr. Sensitive Nips / 03/17/2011 at 6:38pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend found an enormous rose arrangement in the back seat of my car. The flowers were from my fire chief to his wife. I forgot to deliver them. I now have to replace them since my girlfriend thinks I got them for her. The arrangement cost $225. FML

by Dj sMoZ! / 02/15/2011 at 10:30am / Love

Today, my girlfriend found an enormous rose arrangement in the back seat of my car. The flowers were from my fire chief to his wife. I forgot to deliver them. I now have to replace them since my girlfriend thinks I got them for her. The arrangement cost $225. FML

by Dj sMoZ! / 02/15/2011 at 10:30am / Love

Today, I woke 2 hours before my alarm was supposed to go off, feeling incredibly sick. I then ran downstairs and had diarrhea while I threw up. I spent Valentine's Day having diarrhea every time I coughed or sneezed. FML

by Anonymous / 02/15/2011 at 12:09am / United States (Wisconsin) / Health

Today, I woke up to a good friend of mine leaving my bed. The very friend I've had a crush on for months, and knows exactly how I feel about him. Everything was great until he said, "Yeah, about last night... It's just that you were there, and I was weak. See ya." FML

by Emily / 02/14/2011 at 3:25pm / France (Auvergne) / Love

Today, I woke up to a good friend of mine leaving my bed. The very friend I've had a crush on for months, and knows exactly how I feel about him. Everything was great until he said, "Yeah, about last night... It's just that you were there, and I was weak. See ya." FML

by Emily / 02/14/2011 at 3:25pm / France (Auvergne) / Love

Today, I rummaged around in the attic, looking for old pictures of me and my family, so I could make a surprise collage. Instead, I found my dad's old journals, talking about how desperately he didn't want a kid, and how he wanted to leave my mother more and more every day that passed since I was born. FML

by surfergal91 / 02/14/2011 at 3:12pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was working as an intern at a day care. One of the kids touched my chest a couple of times, and I jokingly told him that he shouldn't touch old and ugly women like me. So he started groping the little girls instead. When the other teachers asked him why, he said I had told him to. FML

by Mikabe / 02/14/2011 at 1:51pm / Sweden (Varmlands Lan) / Kids

Today, I was working as an intern at a day care. One of the kids touched my chest a couple of times, and I jokingly told him that he shouldn't touch old and ugly women like me. So he started groping the little girls instead. When the other teachers asked him why, he said I had told him to. FML

by Mikabe / 02/14/2011 at 1:51pm / Sweden (Varmlands Lan) / Kids

Today, I was in class when someone came in with a rose for me. My teacher made me read the card aloud: "I'm breaking up with you, happy Valentine's." It was from my boyfriend. FML

by sexyredhead / 02/14/2011 at 1:14pm / United States / Love

Today, after dealing with tons of drama and working a 14 hour shift, I took a shower. When I stepped out, a weak spot in the floor gave way. While falling through the floor I grabbed the toilet tank lid, which fell into the tank and broke it. Now my leg hurts and the bathroom's flooded. FML

by TheKingDavis / 02/14/2011 at 2:11am / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? I dare you." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

by NotAsToughAsHeThinks / 02/13/2011 at 10:25pm / United States (Montana) / Health

Today, I got a text from a girl that I've had a crush on for a long time, asking me out to dinner. I agreed and went to the restaurant. Not long afterwards, I got text from her saying something had come up, so she couldn't make it. As I was walking back to my car, I saw her walk into the same restaurant with another guy. FML

by Saberwolf / 02/13/2011 at 4:14pm / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, I had to say a deep sincere speech on assembly in front of the whole college on the recent floods in Queensland. Instead of saying "We are Queenslanders, when we get knocked down, we get back up" I stumbled and said "We are Queenslanders, when we get knocked up..." FML

by knockedup / 02/13/2011 at 5:00am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous