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Today, I bought a new armband to hold my iPhone while working out so I can listen to music and I was excited to start getting in shape. Unfortunately, when I tried it on, my arm was too big and it didn't fit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13270) - you deserved it (4423)
On 11/18/2012 at 10:13pm - health - by joe - United States (Maryland)
Today, my daughter had a meltdown when I told her I donated some of her old toys to Goodwill. It turns out Toy Story has taught her that toys have feelings and that she has a meaningful relationship with them. She's in her teens. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10933) - you deserved it (18872)
On 11/17/2012 at 5:31pm - kids - by susan (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my brother decided to join me on my first date. Not only did he answer the door with a bat, he also got inside the car and sat next to my date, pushing me to the back. He stayed the entire time, and walked me back to the house. My mom laughed and gave him $20. It was a dare. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20651) - you deserved it (1489)
On 11/12/2012 at 10:47pm - misc - by Mmkay1515 (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I paid a surprise visit to my parents, after having moved out for university last year. My room had been stripped bare and all the family photos featuring me were missing from the wall. When I asked why, my mom asked me in return why I was asking stupid questions. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14631) - you deserved it (1135)
On 11/09/2012 at 5:03pm - kids - by jan420 (man) - Norway (Ostfold)
Today, I told my family that I wanted to change my last name to my future wife's. We want to have the same last name, and we chose hers because she is an only child, while I have three brothers. Half of my family is laughing and calling me "pussy whipped" while the other half won't speak to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17917) - you deserved it (10772)
On 11/06/2012 at 5:03pm - love - by new name (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my hair straightener broke. My husband suggested putting electrical tape on it because it was heat proof. I did and started straightening my hair. The supposed heat proof tape melted and got stuck in my hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6316) - you deserved it (19476)
On 11/03/2012 at 9:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I decided to delete my Facebook account. My older sister repeatedly called me in tears asking why I'm cutting her out of my life. It seems I can't get rid of social media without my family taking offence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15007) - you deserved it (1418)
On 11/03/2012 at 6:02am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16469) - you deserved it (1937)
On 10/29/2012 at 6:22pm - misc - by Indianagirl94 (woman) - United States
Today, I saw a folder on my son's PC named "PussyPictures". I sat him down for a talk, only to be told they contained pictures of the James Bond character Pussy Galore, for his essay about sexism in movies. He's now mocking me for "having a dirty mind". FML
I agree, your life sucks (6327) - you deserved it (21273)
On 10/27/2012 at 3:28pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Bayern)
Today, as I waited to fly home, a very attractive woman smiled and gestured towards the seat next to me. However, a hyperactive child and his mother barged past into said empty seats. The woman really hit it off with the guy behind, while I was stuck listening to a kid scream at Angry Birds. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14080) - you deserved it (1037)
On 10/27/2012 at 7:53am - misc - by Ohwhy (man) - United Kingdom (Liverpool)
Today, while walking on a nearly empty street, my friend dared me to slap a tall muscular chick on the butt and run away. I went and did it, but before I even had a chance to turn and run, she grabbed me, bent me over her knee and spanked me until I cried. My friend filmed it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5122) - you deserved it (33453)
On 10/24/2012 at 1:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I realized I'm so desperate for money that I started to watch Breaking Bad to learn how to make meth. I stopped, not because I decided it was a bad idea, but because it looks too hard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5499) - you deserved it (15158)
On 10/23/2012 at 6:47pm - money - by Yo Mr. White! ... BETCH! - United States (California)
Today, for the second day in a row, I was constantly abused, yelled at, insulted, and berated by my wife for "endangering our child's life." I took her to the doctor for a vaccination and flu shot yesterday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17184) - you deserved it (2335)
On 10/17/2012 at 6:58pm - love - by DrugsRX (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, the person that interviewed me for a job was the same person I called a "fat bitch" at a baseball game after she knocked over my drink while she was dancing. She recognized me too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6040) - you deserved it (26077)
On 10/16/2012 at 12:16am - work - by leafscupwin - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had to eat my breakfast in terrified silence, as my hungover mother staggered into the room, shouted at the kettle for not boiling fast enough, and after a few seconds, screamed that I'd sabotaged it. I'm now grounded for supposedly trying to fuck with her head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16726) - you deserved it (797)
On 10/12/2012 at 7:00pm - misc - by WTF (woman) - New Zealand (Waikato)
Friday 24 May 2013
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