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Today, I was sent to group therapy. A girl spent twenty minutes telling us horrible details of having been raised incestuously. A side effect of my new medication is yawning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37787) - you deserved it (2812)
On 04/24/2013 at 2:23am - health - by fiercehawk (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I had to explain to a woman why she wasn't allowed to squeeze all the contents of the sample lotion bottle into her own bottle. She threw a fit, and dumped the whole bottle on my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37234) - you deserved it (3125)
On 04/18/2013 at 12:00am - work - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I found out that Yale had actually accepted me seventeen years ago. My mother apparently burned my acceptance package and letters because she didn't want me to upstage her UChicago degree. FML
I agree, your life sucks (86366) - you deserved it (3209)
On 04/15/2013 at 3:37am - misc - by OPhere (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was eating out with a group of friends and my boyfriend. During the meal, I accidentally took a sip from my male friend's glass. My boyfriend pointed and said, "Babe, you took his drink." My friend responded by putting his arm round me and saying, "Whatever, I took her virginity." FML
I agree, your life sucks (50550) - you deserved it (10756)
On 03/28/2013 at 11:11am - intimacy - by everyoneheard (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I was freshening up my makeup in the car before a date. An old lady walked by and said through my open window, "Don't bother. There's no helping you, honey." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32276) - you deserved it (2821)
On 03/25/2013 at 2:36pm - love - by f-ugly - United States
Today, my sink seemed to be filling up with dirty water. Concerned, I turned on the garbage disposal and plunged away. With no change in the water levels, I called a plumber. He reached in, pulled out the drain plug, and give me his bill while chuckling to himself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8178) - you deserved it (29286)
On 03/19/2013 at 10:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my girlfriend left me because our "political views don't match" when I told her we needed to share house chores now that we live together. I know, I'm lost too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25301) - you deserved it (1619)
On 03/19/2013 at 10:08pm - love - by dca101 (man) - United States
Today, we started our 17 hour drive to Michigan for spring break. My mom decided to go to Target to buy some music CDs. All she bought was three Nicki Minaj CDs. She has already replayed the first CD four times. 14 hours to go. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33549) - you deserved it (2680)
On 03/19/2013 at 4:12pm - misc - by :( - United States (South Carolina)
Today, it's my third night of finally living on my own in a house. I can't count the number of times I have run to my knife and pepper spray after hearing "suspicious" sounds. Maybe I'm not ready to be an adult after all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23482) - you deserved it (6242)
On 03/19/2013 at 2:32am - misc - by nearly20yetasfearfulasatoddlerhavingnightmares (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend informed me that from now on during sex, I have to be on top at all times, saying I need the exercise more than him. As offensive as this was, I was actually happy because he's crap on top. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34627) - you deserved it (5256)
On 03/18/2013 at 10:36am - intimacy - by Ann (woman) - United States
Today, an attractive guy came up to me and told me that I looked sexy in a picture online. He then asked himself why he had never asked me out before. Apparently, he doesn't remember our 6-month relationship, or how it ended when he slept with my sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36268) - you deserved it (1959)
On 03/18/2013 at 4:28am - love - by mcds2 (woman) - United States
Today, my teacher read my story about a haunted house for a class assignment. She liked it very much and turned it in to the office to be sent into a state writing competition. An hour later, I was called to the office where the guidance counselor called my work "disturbing" and said I "need help". FML
I agree, your life sucks (28129) - you deserved it (2159)
On 03/08/2013 at 6:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was taking a patient's blood pressure, and listening for his pulse with my stethoscope. I couldn't hear anything, so I adjusted the cuff and tried again. Still no pulse. He pointed out that my stethoscope was the wrong way around and sneered, "You been smokin' the reefer, boy?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (10518) - you deserved it (22840)
On 03/07/2013 at 7:35pm - work - by no sir I have not (man) - United States
Today, while on a crowded public bus, a cute girl asked if she could sit next to me. Problem is, I didn't hear correctly and thought she asked if anyone was sitting next to me. I answered no, causing her to walk off angrily and earning me several disgusted stares from other passengers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27495) - you deserved it (5231)
On 03/04/2013 at 9:23am - misc - by Anonymous - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)
Today, I woke up to find that my parents had replaced my regular alarm clock with a walking one that requires you to get up and find it. The alarm was set to 5:00AM, which would have been fine if it wasn't the weekend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27347) - you deserved it (3087)
On 03/04/2013 at 3:02am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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