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KittyHawkMarch

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KittyHawkMarch

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  • Town/Country : Port Elgin, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 8 May 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2497
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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KittyHawkMarch's page activity

Visits<b>diceplaya</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 1:23am<b>tg210</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 11:15pm<b>hilow212</b> - the 01/01/2013 at 2:59pm

KittyHawkMarch's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of KittyHawkMarch's badges

KittyHawkMarch's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML

#21284275
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21788) - you deserved it (5967)

On 10/24/2014 at 6:54am - intimacy - by too good - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, my best friend and I, after years of sexual tension, began to have sex for the first time. Things got heated and he decided to abruptly stand up with me around him. I got so nervous, spazzed out, and now have 37 staples in my head courtesy of his bookshelf. FML

#21284031
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21445) - you deserved it (3580)

On 10/23/2014 at 9:25pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I watched from my office window as a couple maneuvered their car to squash a dead pigeon flat on the road. I then watched as they got out of the car, set up tripods and started taking photos of it. FML

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML

#21276776
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32019) - you deserved it (4484)

On 10/13/2014 at 6:20am - intimacy - by Drafrica (woman) - South Africa

Today, I got back from a weekend at my best friend's house. Apparently, he and his friend invented a new game. It involves sticking duct tape to their pubic hairs, ripping them out, and sticking as many as possible on my face and body before I wake up. FML

#21276742
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30799) - you deserved it (3165)

On 10/13/2014 at 4:17am - misc - by wtfguys - United States

Today, I was boxing up all my brother's old stuff to take to the attic. I came across a box, and without checking what was inside, I took it up, just to have it fall on my head, to then find out it was filled with dead baby hamsters. FML

#21276741
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33952) - you deserved it (3219)

On 10/13/2014 at 4:13am - animals - by MissBeyoncé - Namibia (Windhoek)

Today, I woke up to find that my acne has lined itself beautifully in a perfect 'L' shape in the centre of my forehead. FML

Today, I witnessed some greasy twat trying to chat a girl up by negging her, which is basically insulting a woman to lower her self-esteem so she's more likely to put out. "Goddamn negger", I muttered. "The fuck did you just say?!" yelled a black guy standing beside me. FML

#21275066
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30995) - you deserved it (14272)

On 10/10/2014 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I missed work for the third time this week. My dog gets lonely when I'm away and has found out how to shut off my alarm clock. FML

#21273263
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33780) - you deserved it (4900)

On 10/08/2014 at 12:21am - animals - by fckUrex - United States (California)

Today, I stood up too quickly and got dizzy, so I sat on the edge of the bed to regain my balance. I started dozing off to sleep again, got confused, and peed down the side of my bed thinking I was on the toilet. FML

#21272641
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34500) - you deserved it (9154)

On 10/07/2014 at 7:33am - misc - by Waterfalls (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my laziness reached a whole new level when I caught myself skipping the longer FML stories to read the shorter ones. FML

#21272079
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29426) - you deserved it (11520)

On 10/06/2014 at 3:12pm - misc - by eh - Azerbaijan (Baki)

Today, as a limo driver, I had to drive 8 guys for a night-out from their wives. I put the Michigan/Rutgers game on the radio, thinking they would appreciate that. Apparently, they wanted to listen to their "pump-up" songs instead, which were mostly Katy Perry songs. FML

#21271972
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35899) - you deserved it (4382)

On 10/06/2014 at 11:05am - work - by theseguysarewhipped... - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got robbed. I just moved so I didn't have much in my new house. They did decide that my cat was valuable enough to steal. FML

#21271461
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42288) - you deserved it (2500)

On 10/05/2014 at 7:30pm - animals - by FML - United States (Texas)

Today, a girl puked on me. No warnings, nothing. She just threw up on me, then walked off like nothing even happened. FML

#21271247
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38859) - you deserved it (2484)

On 10/05/2014 at 1:48pm - health - by Eww - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got on one knee in front of my girlfriend. I pulled out the ring, uttered the words "Lisa, will you..." then abruptly shat my pants. FML

#21271177
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41402) - you deserved it (5089)

On 10/05/2014 at 11:47am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)



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