Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Kitty19

Offline (3 hours ago) | Search for a member

Kitty19

6Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1001
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Kitty19 : I only trust people who like big butts, they cannot lie.

Kitty19's page activity

Visits<b>pantherfan0877</b> - 19 hours ago<b>MyDadLeftMeInKFC</b> - yesterday at 1:41am<b>HarshD9619</b> - yesterday at 1:37am<b>jfoll25</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 4:46am<b>Carnage23</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 1:44am<b>hare</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 4:37am<b>DenverTyrrell</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 3:10am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 6:33pm<b>angelk19</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 4:38pm<b>Mario_mane</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 6:48pm<b>Semperfi92340</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 4:01pm<b>PerSueTwo513</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 9:02am<b>decimater</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 8:33pm<b>pureportedpear</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 7:02pm<b>AwkwardSloth</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 6:44pm<b>HowieDoIt</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 8:26am<b>macalo_03</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 12:22am<b>jamespesche</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 11:29pm

Liked!<b>jamespesche</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 5:29am<b>eaglerob</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 8:13pm<b>adityagopal27</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 1:20pm<b>gavdarv</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 7:19pm<b>tallwhiteguy96</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 2:21pm<b>Alicestraza</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 2:25am

Kitty19's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of Kitty19's badges

Kitty19's favorite FMLs

Today, while using a public toilet, a guy started pissing beside me at the urinal. The breach of bathroom etiquette then escalated to him taking a long look down at me and saying "Nice sack, dude." followed by him finishing up and leaving without even washing his hands. FML

#21302695
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28132) - you deserved it (2239)

On 11/20/2014 at 11:35am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my brother offered me $20 to practice his kissing on me for his date later this evening. FML

#21296136
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42383) - you deserved it (4025)

On 11/10/2014 at 11:31am - misc - by SisterOfTard (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I found out the only reason my boyfriend asked me out is because he thought I "looked like a girl who'd be into anal". FML

#21295289
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34435) - you deserved it (3810)

On 11/09/2014 at 8:31am - misc - by analgirl (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I excitedly told my mom that I'm pregnant with my second child. She shot back, "You know what's a REAL achievement? Jacking your dad off in church last week without anyone noticing. Aim higher." I really didn't need to know that. FML

#21294899
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39778) - you deserved it (3412)

On 11/08/2014 at 6:02pm - kids - by jennabee97 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend told my four-year-old sister that "fatass" means "beautiful lady." I didn't know about this until I took my sister shopping with me. The woman at the till said she was adorable; my sister replied, "Thanks, fatass." FML

#21288917
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31176) - you deserved it (2606)

On 10/31/2014 at 6:55am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff)

Today, I stumbled across one of my son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets are technically "whores" because they hook up with countless cords for a "charge." I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML

#21285975
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32525) - you deserved it (4550)

On 10/26/2014 at 10:42pm - kids - by MySonThePoet (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was hugging my girlfriend after she had a really bad day at work, when she burst into tears and started sobbing. For some reason that I'll never understand, it gave me a hard-on. She felt it, and now she thinks I'm a sick bastard. FML

#21285040
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32710) - you deserved it (5346)

On 10/25/2014 at 2:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, coming home, I opened up my door to find my drunk boyfriend trying to teach our three baby parakeets to perch on his erect penis. FML

#21278553
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35548) - you deserved it (3731)

On 10/15/2014 at 7:36pm - misc - by facepalm (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was flipping out because I couldn't find my wallet, and after several hours of cussing myself out, I went downstairs to make breakfast. I poured cereal into my bowl and my wallet flopped out with the Honey Nut Cheerios. I need to stop drinking. FML

#21267969
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22632) - you deserved it (33312)

On 09/29/2014 at 10:13pm - misc - by KasSmoke - United States (Texas)

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

#21258033
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31655) - you deserved it (18223)

On 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm - animals - by Anonymous - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, my blind date turned out to be my gynecologist. FML

#21229613
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48853) - you deserved it (4182)

On 08/04/2014 at 10:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went on Facebook. The third post down was a selfie of my mom looking sad, with the caption, "God I need a good dicking." FML

#21218442
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50922) - you deserved it (11797)

On 07/23/2014 at 4:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my best friend wanted to see what my new boyfriend looks like. By chance, he'd sent me a Snapchat a few minutes before, so I opened it to show her, only to see that it was a dick pic. FML

#21132642
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33531) - you deserved it (39442)

On 05/06/2014 at 7:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, to teach my 14-year-old son a serious lesson for bullying a child at school again, I grounded him for the rest of the year. He just snorted and said, "Cool, I'll just jack off all year then! Thanks, mum!" and happily retreated to his bedroom. FML

#21132433
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43231) - you deserved it (8265)

On 05/06/2014 at 2:38pm - kids - by Satan's Mum (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my art teacher showed off a painting of his name he got in Japan. I can read Japanese, and it actually says "Old idiot". I really don't want to break it to him. FML

#21130223
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45229) - you deserved it (4736)

On 05/04/2014 at 2:12am - misc - by Sam (woman) - United States (Missouri)



FML's blog

  • FML's Thanksgiving Special: TGS
  • As many of us know through popular culture, today is Thanksgiving in the US. Come on, we’ve all seen a TV show involving a Thanksgiving dinner or plans to do so that have gone awry due to one of the main…

Wednesday 26 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: