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Kinijo

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Kinijo
  • Town/Country : Baltimore , USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 21 April 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 1716
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Kinijo : Hey, I've been on this site for a while but I never commented much. I like reading about people's lives and having a laugh so don't take anything I say seriously.

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Kinijo's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

#503348
859 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49402) - you deserved it (598259)

On 03/21/2009 at 12:46am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went into my older brother's room to get a condom. This happened the other day too when my boyfriend forgot one. So I went in there today and there was a note that said "Little Sister, stop using my condoms. And your boyfriend sounds like a girl when he climaxes." FML

#497309
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26326) - you deserved it (103176)

On 03/20/2009 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by Stacy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was out with my friend. My six year old daughter was also with us. While we were walking through the parking lot, my daughter asked me in a very loud voice "Mommy, does a blow job taste bad?" FML

#360907
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64773) - you deserved it (12970)

On 03/15/2009 at 10:18pm - intimacy - by hala (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was sitting in Science class and to my surprise I felt my pants suddenly becoming warm and wet. I looked behind me to see that 4 boys from my class had inserted a small funnel into my exposed buttcrack and where pouring the melted butter from the experiment into that area. FML

#260451
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82183) - you deserved it (24197)

On 03/10/2009 at 1:13pm - misc - by Sarah - United Kingdom (Bolton)

Today, a man in my town was arrested for hiding methanphetamine in a hollowed out walking cane and distributing it to the population of his retirement complex. That man was my 58 year old father. FML

#259923
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62453) - you deserved it (2221)

On 03/10/2009 at 11:01am - misc - by Noname (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I decided to do a load of laundry. Two minutes into the cycle, I realized that I left my iPod in my sweatpants pocket. The washing machine door locks automatically and cannot be opened until the 40-minute cycle is up. FML

Today, a guy who I've been on five dates with called me for the first time in 2 weeks. The first thing I said was, "Don't expect me to go out with you again after going AWOL on me." Then he told me his mom died. FML

#198130
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12390) - you deserved it (58350)

On 03/03/2009 at 6:08pm - love - by ouch (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I babysat a five year old girl. She ran up to me, threw her arms around my waist and said, "YUMMY! I'm going to eat you!" with her face in my crotch. I said sarcastically under my breath, "Finally, some action!" I turned around to find her dad staring at me, having heard. He's my cousin. FML

#159589
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16395) - you deserved it (80965)

On 02/28/2009 at 5:59am - kids - by tryena (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my professor, who was born without arms, asked somebody "need a hand?" There are over 300 students in that class and I was the only one laughing. FML

Today, I complimented my mom with "Hey, I think you lost some weight." She replied with "Yeah, I think you found it." FML

#69443
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39916) - you deserved it (5787)

On 02/18/2009 at 4:09pm - health - by Kristina (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went out to dinner with my family. I was given a kids menu when the hostess sat us down. I'm 24. FML

#62239
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38059) - you deserved it (2516)

On 02/17/2009 at 6:23pm - misc - by morg2000 - Mexico

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
496 comments

I agree, your life sucks (213745) - you deserved it (73285)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, while copying some stuff for school, I felt someone rubbing her boobs against my back. I got a boner and when I looked to see who the hot chick was, I saw my fat friend rubbing his man boobs against my back. FML

#30754
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24320) - you deserved it (48724)

On 02/12/2009 at 11:17am - intimacy - by florisvanlent (man) - Netherlands (Drenthe)

Today, I greeted a mom and a little girl at the place where I work. The little girl looks at me, looks back at her mom, and says, "Mommy, I hate people." FML

#19635
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29046) - you deserved it (1985)

On 02/10/2009 at 12:58am - misc - by neversayhiagain (woman) - United States (Kansas)



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