About Kinijo : Hey, I've been on this site for a while but I never commented much. I like reading about people's lives and having a laugh so don't take anything I say seriously.
Kinijo's FML badges
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Kinijo's favorite FMLs
Today, I was talking this pretty religious girl that I like. We were playing a game and I asked her if she could go back in history and meet anyone who would it be. She said Jesus. Without thinking I said "I mean someone that was real." FML
by Ben / 01/24/2010 at 10:31pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
by Funnymann / 01/22/2010 at 3:51pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Rodrigeuz26 / 01/22/2010 at 2:26am / United States (Illinois) / Love
by masterzach21 / 01/22/2010 at 1:25am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
Today, I spent 3 hours in my home recording studio. I was recording vocals and was trying to hit a very hard series of notes. I nailed it after 2 hours and listened. You can hear the vocals, but the EQ settings were tweaked in just the right way where you can hear my dog licking his nuts. FML
by Parental / 01/22/2010 at 12:08am / United States (Wisconsin) / Animals
by Anonymous / 01/22/2010 at 12:02am / United States (Nevada) / Love
Today, my female room-mate decided to throw away my xbox, along with a few other possessions because they reminded her of her ex. Furiously, I asked her if "it was that time of the month again." Now I can't feel my balls, and miss my games. FML
by NYCguy / 01/19/2010 at 10:59pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by sportyhusband / 01/19/2010 at 10:46pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
Today, as I walked into my class, someone shouted at me, "Wild Snorlax Appeared! Use Your Ultra Balls!", since I am overweight and everyone in class laughed at me. I got made fun of by Pokémon nerds. FML
by snorlax / 01/19/2010 at 7:03pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I walked into Jamba Juice like I do every day. I decided to order something different than I usually do, and was flattered when the cashier recognized me. Then he switched places with another employee, and from the back room I hear "Hey, ugly's back again." FML
by Anonymous / 01/18/2010 at 8:56pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML
by Jon / 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
Today, my estranged, alcoholic father decided to tell me I have a sister. After 30 mins of him describing how beautiful she is and how much we look alike and how she has lived one town away from me her entire life, I was excited to the point of tears. Too bad she died a year ago. Thanks dad. FML
by Mills / 01/18/2010 at 6:49am / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous
by poppet2010 / 01/17/2010 at 10:58am / Miscellaneous
Today, I came home from a long day at work to find a path of rose pedals from the front door. Gasping with surprise, I followed it past the living room... past the bedroom... into the kitchen, where there was a note that said "Friends coming over tonight, we need food, love you!" FML
by Romantic / 01/15/2010 at 3:33am / United States (Florida) / Love
Today, my brother and his friend ambushed me, tied me to a chair, and put a sock in my mouth. My mom found me 10 minutes later, took the sock out, and asked, "Why are you tied to a chair?" I told her what happened. She looked at me, laughed, stuffed the sock back in my mouth, and left. FML
by boundandgagged / 01/13/2010 at 2:36pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was fired from my job because I, in my bosses words, "Abided by company policy to such an…