Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Kingspin

Search for a member

Kingspin

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 15 September 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1209
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 13 posted

About Kingspin : Your average Canadian teenager. No, we don't eat buffalo and live in igloos during winter; but we do say "eh"!

Kingspin's page activity

Visits<b>MissMayLaw001</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 1:45pm<b>hai111</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 10:28pm<b>Giantflyingsheep</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 10:17am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 7:54am<b>jonloran</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 11:23pm<b>TiddlesWiddles</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 4:57pm<b>UserOfTheMind</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 10:18pm<b>hailzz_96</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 8:04pm<b>adamant84</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 10:36am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 8:42am<b>valerie_273</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 11:27am<b>clairesucks</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 6:20am<b>waffleeater_153</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 9:40pm<b>Cadillac_kid_15</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 9:15pm<b>IJG2000</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 10:43pm<b>jmbjenny</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 12:46pm<b>DaDezza244</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 5:17am<b>alexlaurennic</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 1:01pm

Fucked!<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 1:42pm<b>clairesucks</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 12:20pm

Kingspin's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Kingspin's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML

#16410366
408 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16763) - you deserved it (77393)

On 05/29/2011 at 11:34pm - intimacy - by yummy - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend and I were taking a shower together. We were fooling around when she takes the shower head and starts spraying my penis with it. I asked her "what are you doing?" Her response: "I'm watering it to make it grow." FML

#16399874
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60552) - you deserved it (12640)

On 05/29/2011 at 10:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was playing at a bingo hall, when I got a bingo for $50. I got so excited that I accidentally yelled, "Holy fuck!" They kicked me out. I didn't get the money. FML

#16381910
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18142) - you deserved it (43004)

On 05/28/2011 at 1:27am - money - by greenhide8 - United States (North Dakota)

Today, I found out what getting slapped in the face with lettuce feels like. FML

#16367769
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27237) - you deserved it (7386)

On 05/27/2011 at 1:26am - misc - by moe - United States

Today, my husband and I had just got over a big argument, and I asked him to cut me some cucumbers for my eyes to help me relax. I was laying down, eyed closed, and he set them on my eyes. They weren't cucumbers, they were lemons. FML

#16304417
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22051) - you deserved it (43605)

On 05/22/2011 at 9:58pm - misc - by lemonhead -

Today, I had a parent-teacher conference with my 8 year old son. He'd written "Chuck Norris" as the answer for every question on his test. FML

#16217085
441 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38975) - you deserved it (10507)

On 05/17/2011 at 12:54am - kids - by yobruh -

Today, I locked myself in the bathroom and started spanking the ferret. I started to get really into it when my dad started pounding on the door and yelled, "Son, that's great staying power, but can you finish up already?" FML

#16068047
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14351) - you deserved it (49243)

On 05/06/2011 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Saudi Arabia

Today, I realized that potato chips are made from potatoes. I'm 26. FML

#15803109
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11007) - you deserved it (77258)

On 04/16/2011 at 1:14am - misc - by Username - United States (California)

Today, I was waiting for the pan to heat up so I could make myself scrambled eggs. Just then, my mom runs up to me, cracks an egg open on my head, and runs away laughing. I only had one other egg. FML

#15270660
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29730) - you deserved it (4351)

On 03/11/2011 at 12:20am - misc - by Laura (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was having the best sex with my husband, and right when I reached climax, he shouted "Abracadabra!" FML

#15038049
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33692) - you deserved it (6734)

On 02/19/2011 at 8:12am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70251) - you deserved it (6593)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my roommate decided to prank me by leaving a fake suicide note on the bathroom door and lying motionless in a bathtub full of water and red coloring. When I went, horrified, to take a closer look, he lunged at me and screamed. I was so scared I pissed myself. FML

#14738365
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47613) - you deserved it (5637)

On 01/27/2011 at 11:35pm - misc - by Scaredwitless (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, at the supermarket, my mother stopped in the middle of a lane and imitated a gorilla as a way of asking me from far away if I wanted any bananas. FML

#14616201
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27033) - you deserved it (3880) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 5:50pm - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

#14610613
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42736) - you deserved it (27646) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my last remaining pet, a hamster, died. Even he thinks it's better to drown in his water dish than brave the world living with me. FML

#14261370
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26935) - you deserved it (6735)

On 12/19/2010 at 3:51pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: