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King_paradox

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King_paradox

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King_paradoxKing_paradox
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 April 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3315
  • Number of comments : 91
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About King_paradox : I'm a wizim

=E=

It's a wizim thing

King_paradox's page activity

Visits<b>12goldfish69</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 12:25am<b>zinoxity</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 12:17pm<b>LiliLatte</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 11:33am<b>sprinkle90</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 6:06am<b>thatchick1405</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 1:26am<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 1:13pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 12:04am<b>kristallan</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 3:46pm<b>bzac24</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 9:52am<b>mario2012</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 11:22pm<b>sarahv04</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 11:48pm<b>cmchewy</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 1:30pm<b>raphanne</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 7:36am<b>lilhellian</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 5:55pm<b>Miss_CHEESEPUFFS</b> - the 10/07/2013 at 7:25pm<b>WhoopteDo</b> - the 09/30/2013 at 6:48pm<b>wilburhp</b> - the 09/29/2013 at 6:30am<b>hawkeyepeirce</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 5:28pm

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Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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King_paradox's favorite FMLs

Today, I babysat a 6-year-old boy for the first time. When I said it was his bedtime, he just screamed "Eat a dick!" at me. I was so shocked, all I could do was leave him be. When his parents returned, I had to make up an excuse for why he was still awake and watching TV, to save my pride. FML

#21234068
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33131) - you deserved it (8414)

On 08/10/2014 at 2:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, I called my boyfriend and invited him over to watch a movie. He was all for it, until I mentioned I was on my period, at which point he said "NOPE." and hung up on me. FML

#21234002
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39416) - you deserved it (6100)

On 08/10/2014 at 12:42pm - love - by painedandpissed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I drove an hour to a friend's wedding. Realizing I was too early, I sat in my car at a gas station and watched The Office to kill time. I walked in to see the newly married couple escorting the last few rows out. I had been told the wrong time and the wedding was over. FML

Today, I was mowing the lawn while wearing gym shorts. Because I had no pockets, I tucked my phone into the waistband of my shorts. I didn't notice my phone had slipped until the lawnmower started making an awful sound. FML

#21233543
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33187) - you deserved it (19559)

On 08/09/2014 at 9:30pm - misc - by ThatsNotGrass (man) - Canada

Today, I heard my sister gagging in her room. She was doing it quietly, and I got pretty concerned, after hearing a lot about bulimia recently. I knocked, then heard a gasp, so I let myself in, only to see her on her knees and her boyfriend with his underwear around his ankles. FML

#21233355
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51132) - you deserved it (20935)

On 08/09/2014 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, while working my shift at the grocery store, we ran out of muffins. I'm a little overweight, and I guess that's the reason an irate customer accused me of eating all of them. FML

#21233183
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40148) - you deserved it (3849)

On 08/09/2014 at 9:50am - work - by muffins - United States (Maryland)

Today, my idiot son tried to get a veteran's discount at American Eagle because he's "a fifth prestige" on Call of Duty. FML

#21233179
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42096) - you deserved it (6118)

On 08/09/2014 at 9:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while I was working customer support, a lady hung up on me mid-sentence, and I trailed off, saying "…aaannnddd you hung up on me like a bitch." Turned out she was still on the line and had just accidentally hit mute. FML

#21232769
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23463) - you deserved it (36060)

On 08/08/2014 at 8:16pm - work - by suspended (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I had a seizure while at the airport, ready to go on vacation with my family. We ended up missing our flight. My mom spent most of the ride home making cracks about how I'm always ruining things with my "dramatics". Sorry that I have epilepsy, mom. FML

#21232741
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47686) - you deserved it (2865)

On 08/08/2014 at 7:25pm - health - by Anonymous - Sweden (Vasternorrlands Lan)

Today, I put on a porno, trying to unwind after a bad day. 10 minutes in, I was so pissed off with the girl constantly repeating "You like that? Yeah?" and the cameraman's obsession with the guy's asscrack that I started yelling at the screen. Now I'm more stressed than ever. FML

#21232670
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38500) - you deserved it (12808)

On 08/08/2014 at 5:29pm - intimacy - by FUCK YOU (man) - United States

Today, I saw a cute guy walking out of a restaurant. When he saw me, he smiled and to be a bit flirty I bit my lip. Too bad it started to bleed like hell. FML

#21232320
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33519) - you deserved it (11236)

On 08/08/2014 at 3:40am - love - by alisaav (woman) - Thailand

Today, as I was driving, a massive cockroach clicked its way across my windshield. I pulled over to fling it out the window, but it spread its wings and flew around like a hook-armed stabbing machine. I lost it in the dark car and now I can't find it. It's going to be a long drive home. FML

#21230826
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35950) - you deserved it (3846)

On 08/06/2014 at 9:34am - animals - by Baustigt - Australia

Today, my brother decided our bathroom needed a clock so he used an old DVD player. He put it on the edge of the tub. FML

#21229931
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36404) - you deserved it (3479)

On 08/05/2014 at 7:55am - misc - by Anonymous - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, on a flight, I needed to use the restroom. The passenger next to me was in a deep sleep, and was very large, so I couldn't get out by climbing over him. The urge got severe, so I resorted to tapping him on the shoulder. Turns out he had some nice reflexes and hit me in the face. FML

#21229781
71 comments


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