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King_paradox

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King_paradox

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King_paradoxKing_paradox
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 April 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3850
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About King_paradox : I'm a wizim

=E=

It's a wizim thing

King_paradox's page activity

Visits<b>Clay_Pidgeon</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 11:44pm<b>12goldfish69</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 12:25am<b>zinoxity</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 12:17pm<b>LiliLatte</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 11:33am<b>sprinkle90</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 6:06am<b>thatchick1405</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 1:26am<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 1:13pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 12:04am<b>kristallan</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 3:46pm<b>bzac24</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 9:52am<b>mario2012</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 11:22pm<b>sarahv04</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 11:48pm<b>cmchewy</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 1:30pm<b>raphanne</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 7:36am<b>lilhellian</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 5:55pm<b>Miss_CHEESEPUFFS</b> - the 10/07/2013 at 7:25pm<b>WhoopteDo</b> - the 09/30/2013 at 6:48pm<b>wilburhp</b> - the 09/29/2013 at 6:30am

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King_paradox's favorite FMLs

Today, I yelled at my boyfriend's cat for staring at me, then cried about it for an hour. Pregnancy life. FML

#21056743
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42980) - you deserved it (9041)

On 02/10/2014 at 10:16pm - animals - by alii2349 - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was waiting in line at a clothes store when someone cut in in front of me, and the gentlemen in front of me. I shouted, "Hey! Queue starts back here!". He responded by pointing out the "gentlemen" in front was actually a very realistic mannequin. FML

#21056589
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34398) - you deserved it (15358)

On 02/10/2014 at 7:45pm - misc - by QueueJumper (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I got into a slight spot of shit with my new boss over his speech. Apparently he was not actually impersonating Sylvester the Cat, and he just has a speech impediment. When I jokingly said "sufferin' succotash" to him, he wasn't pleased at all. FML

#21056453
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20553) - you deserved it (38607)

On 02/10/2014 at 5:37pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, and for the third time this week, I found a pubic hair in my soup. I'm currently bed-ridden and can't afford to piss off my boyfriend by complaining. FML

#21054632
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39675) - you deserved it (4829)

On 02/08/2014 at 5:14pm - misc - by vey (woman) - China (Beijing)

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. My hand-eye coordination went straight to hell and I managed to accidentally smack my nose into his penis. He told all his friends about it, and I'm apparently now known as Woodpecker. FML

#21054451
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48601) - you deserved it (9544)

On 02/08/2014 at 1:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after my car being in the shop for over a day and with no updates from the dealership, I decided to pay them a visit. The place was almost empty, and they hadn't done any work on my car. But judging by the used condom on my back seat, somebody got their own oil checked. FML

#21053684
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43947) - you deserved it (3823)

On 02/07/2014 at 7:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I told my professor that I'll be missing class next week due to upcoming surgery. I asked if I could take the exam that I'd otherwise miss another day. He said no, and that I'd just have to take a failing grade, then wished me luck with the surgery. FML

#21053454
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49725) - you deserved it (3684)

On 02/07/2014 at 3:30pm - health - by ... - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend and I were quite drunk while we were fooling around on the couch, when I decided I wanted to lose my virginity to her. I was two thrusts in when she burst out laughing. Looking down, I realized I was between her cheeks and the couch cushion. I lost my virginity to her couch. FML

#21053213
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52423) - you deserved it (18544)

On 02/07/2014 at 9:18am - intimacy - by Unknown - United States (Iowa)

Today, my mother-in-law tried to "accidentally" run me over. FML

#21052599
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43372) - you deserved it (3807)

On 02/06/2014 at 6:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I presented my child with the classic "Who came first, the chicken or the egg?" conundrum. In return, I got a detailed lecture on how birds evolved from dinosaurs, how life was created in the sea and an explanation about evolution. I got schooled by a 9 year old. FML

#21051355
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42043) - you deserved it (21843)

On 02/05/2014 at 2:52pm - kids - by Evolution mama (woman) - Iceland (Gullbringusysla)

Today, I logged into my bank account and started crying. Not because of the balance, but because the password is my anniversary with my ex, and it's the only reminder I have of happy days in my life. FML

Today, due to the dry weather, my nose became dry and began to bleed so I plugged it with toilet paper and went about my business. Forgetting about it, I later went out to smoke a cigarette. Not paying attention, I lit the toilet paper on fire as well. FML

#21050725
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35917) - you deserved it (40386)

On 02/04/2014 at 9:48pm - health - by anonymous - United States

Today, I'm a little over a month pregnant. My fiancé has decided that if we both act like I'm not pregnant, "the baby will get the hint and go away". FML

#21050194
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54571) - you deserved it (6719)

On 02/04/2014 at 9:50am - kids - by LadyDeadpool88 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, at the grocery store, an elderly woman asked for help with some tea. I lent her a hand, spending a good twenty minutes reading different labels out loud until she found one she liked. After she was done, she handed me a pamphlet and said, "You're a nice girl. I hope you don't go to hell." FML

#21050005
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40808) - you deserved it (4368)

On 02/04/2014 at 1:16am - misc - by Lithiac - United States (Florida)



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