Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

KingCeltic77

Search for a member

KingCeltic77
  • Town/Country : Chicago, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5644
  • Number of comments : 511
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 26 posted

About KingCeltic77 : The Blackhawks are gonna win the Stanley Cup!

KingCeltic77's last visitors

anonymous188bomzomjayybbalexmac222rockne93AcExDeuceBatmanPotatoPalindromesque

KingCeltic77's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of KingCeltic77's badges

KingCeltic77's favorite FMLs

Today, I was babysitting for my mom's coworkers two little boys. they went to bed around 9 and I was watching a movie on HBO. I fell asleep before the movie was over. I woke up to the parents walking into the house. I looked at the TV, and porn was on. FML

#247252
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50846) - you deserved it (10553)

On 03/08/2009 at 10:53pm - kids - by monty (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I was pushing my 4 year old on the swing. I did what we call our "under doggie push": I throw her up in the air while I run underneath her before she hits me coming back down. I walked away to get my water and she yelled across the park "Can we do it doggie-style again?" FML

#234103
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52463) - you deserved it (16904)

On 03/07/2009 at 1:28pm - kids - by Dang-ItsDanielle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my name was called during an assembly because I won some sort of prize. Everyone booed. FML

#232169
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64940) - you deserved it (5817)

On 03/07/2009 at 2:01am - misc - by ladeda (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while out to lunch, my sister called me and asked me to pick her up from the mall. I told her she'd have to wait. She got pissed off and started cursing at me, so I hung up on her. She called me back 37 times until I answered and yelled "WILL YOU LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE?" It was my boss. FML

#227802
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18310) - you deserved it (44973)

On 03/06/2009 at 5:31pm - misc - by jacks_smirking_revenge (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While I'm brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML

#221601
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43670) - you deserved it (23982)

On 03/05/2009 at 9:27pm - misc - by mr.palendrome (man) - United States (New York)

Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML

#221148
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61709) - you deserved it (3432)

On 03/05/2009 at 8:51pm - kids - by SadDad - United States (Florida)

Today, my dad and a construction worker were having a long talk. I heard the door slam, and assumed that this worker had left. So I yelled out "Hey dad what were you talking about? Did you talk slowly so the idiot could understand?" Turns out my dad was the one who had walked out. FML

#219438
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5450) - you deserved it (56629)

On 03/05/2009 at 6:26pm - misc - by anashaalmajiid (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to visit my fiancé's dying grandmother in the hospital with him. She started talking to us about living each day to the fullest. His grandmother points to me and says, "Life is short. That's why you don't waste any time screwing girls who look like that." FML

#197015
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64014) - you deserved it (2877)

On 03/03/2009 at 4:36pm - misc - by joAnne (woman) - United States

Today, my parents refused to visit me at college because "the flights are too expensive." They are currently shopping for a new car to replace my mother's two-year-old Porsche. FML

#188940
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66801) - you deserved it (2767)

On 03/02/2009 at 8:57pm - money - by Vahootie (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was typing up a love letter on my computer. A sexual love letter. I was in a classroom, I'm the teacher, I'm gay, and my love letter showed up on the tv screen while my 7th grade students were taking a test. It was up on the screen for 15 minutes. FML

#168595
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60556) - you deserved it (262605)

On 03/01/2009 at 4:08am - intimacy - by Sad (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was typing up a love letter on my computer. A sexual love letter. I was in a classroom, I'm the teacher, I'm gay, and my love letter showed up on the tv screen while my 7th grade students were taking a test. It was up on the screen for 15 minutes. FML

#168595
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60556) - you deserved it (262605)

On 03/01/2009 at 4:08am - intimacy - by Sad (man) - United States (California)

Today, I met this really attractive guy who introduced himself as Wyan. He was really cool and sweet and we got along pretty well. Then someone informed me that his name is Ryan and that he has a speech impediment, AFTER I had been referring to him as Wyan for quite some time. FML

#150793
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43959) - you deserved it (12976)

On 02/27/2009 at 2:58am - love - by hellosaila (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while babysitting, the oldest little girl who is 7 went through my purse. She pulled out a half empty bottle of lube. She asked what it was and I told her lotion. I went to the bathroom and when I came out, the bottle was empty and there were 4 kids covered in lube. Then their mom came home. FML

#142269
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39148) - you deserved it (23600)

On 02/26/2009 at 11:08am - kids - by iailwkrb (woman) - United States (North Carolina)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: