About KingCeltic77 : The Blackhawks are gonna win the Stanley Cup!
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Today, my mom was screaming at me and said, "I wish I'd never adopted you." I guess I'm adopted then. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46877) - you deserved it (1915)
On 08/04/2011 at 10:45pm - misc - by Thebestman123 - United States (Iowa)
Today, I walked in on my brother performing voodoo on a doll with my picture taped to its face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25632) - you deserved it (3315)
Today, I have to take medicine that gives me painful, violent farts. Tomorrow, I have to either get fired or go work in an office that's dead silent. How silent? Last week I heard my coworker drop a paperclip, three desks away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30681) - you deserved it (2765)
On 07/30/2011 at 2:58am - work - by Tootie (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, at a campfire, I whipped out my guitar to serenade this girl I like with a Nick Drake song. When I was done, she said it was nice, but that my singing voice sounds a bit like the Swedish Chef from the Muppet Show. A couple of people nearby burst out laughing in agreement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19726) - you deserved it (4621)
On 07/28/2011 at 8:27pm - misc - by Branski - United States
Today, I learned that I'm allergic to hornets. I also learned that when your mom sprays a hornets' nest, and they come after you, that jumping in the pool doesn't help. They hover and wait for you to surface. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30739) - you deserved it (2314)
On 07/25/2011 at 12:14am - health - by sisi9999 (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was discussing the traffic with my brother. He said the most common car colour is red. I said it was black. We ended up betting €100 on which three vehicles of either colour would pass by our house first. It seems a convoy of fire trucks had somewhere to be in a hurry. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24300) - you deserved it (8017) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I caught a cab to take me to a hospital appointment. The driver turned around and told me I was in the Cash Cab. I got really excited and screamed. That is, until she laughed and said, "Just kidding. I always wanted to do that to someone." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28683) - you deserved it (6425)
On 07/15/2011 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (65179) - you deserved it (6889)
On 07/13/2011 at 1:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I realized that I look sexier in my fiancée's panties than she does. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24097) - you deserved it (15254)
On 07/08/2011 at 2:48pm - intimacy - by Joe - United States
I agree, your life sucks (30391) - you deserved it (3381)
On 07/08/2011 at 1:23am - misc - by Yoda (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I got home to three boys riding bikes out in front of my house, smiling at me. I instantly thought they were checking me out, so I smiled sweetly at them. Turns out they were flaunting the fact that they just stole all 3 of our bikes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24301) - you deserved it (7896)
On 07/06/2011 at 4:33am - misc - by Emily - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, my sister was on shrooms. I wasn't able to tackle her before she called the cops to say that her books were trying to eat her face off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25465) - you deserved it (2574)
On 07/01/2011 at 3:41am - misc - by ugh annoying - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my family went out to dinner at a seafood restaurant. While we were eating our food, my grandma demanded to see the manager, and loudly complained that her fish was "too fishy". FML
I agree, your life sucks (24900) - you deserved it (2918)
On 06/25/2011 at 4:39pm - misc - by Anonymous - Switzerland (Vaud)
Today, my mom got drunk and told me to leave the house because "I've been mooching off her for too long". I'm 14 and now am sleeping at my friends house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36560) - you deserved it (1919)
Today, I spent a full hour working on my British accent. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6852) - you deserved it (25238)
On 06/17/2011 at 3:32am - misc - by seriouslybored (woman) - United States (California)
Monday 17 June 2013
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