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Kimchi_King

Offline (the 09/21/2014 at 4:32am) | Search for a member

Kimchi_King

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 568
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Kimchi_King : My name is Jacob Kim. I have traveled around the universe with the Doctor, ganked demons with Sam and Dean Winchester. I have studied at Hogwarts and under the Jedi council. With all that knowledge I helped Sherlock Holmes solve a few cases.. So yeah I'm a pretty big deal

Kimchi_King's page activity

Visits<b>Nevracceptdefeat</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 5:42pm<b>miichiii</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 6:05am<b>vegasked</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 4:05am<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 1:56am<b>boostedc</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 5:09am<b>RicanDucky</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 12:04pm<b>fancypotato</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 12:01am<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 1:45am<b>alexa_fike</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 8:22pm<b>chamay</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 7:11pm

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Kimchi_King's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend was about to sneeze. To avoid getting his new tablet wet, he chose to sneeze right into my face instead. FML

#21252384
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33581) - you deserved it (3132)

On 09/05/2014 at 12:17pm - love - by anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I dreamed I was wrestling an alligator. I quickly woke up to my girlfriend yelling and me holding her in a headlock. FML

#21247589
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37240) - you deserved it (5001)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16am - misc - by AgentOrion - United States (Alabama)

Today, my new boyfriend and I got intimate for the first time. He started whispering in my ear, but I couldn't understand him. He pushed me away and ignored me the rest of the night. Apparently it's a huge turn-off that I can't talk dirty in Klingon. FML

#21246884
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42745) - you deserved it (4925)

On 08/28/2014 at 12:34am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my idiot son tried to get a veteran's discount at American Eagle because he's "a fifth prestige" on Call of Duty. FML

#21233179
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42039) - you deserved it (6113)

On 08/09/2014 at 9:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I saw a cute guy walking out of a restaurant. When he saw me, he smiled and to be a bit flirty I bit my lip. Too bad it started to bleed like hell. FML

#21232320
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33472) - you deserved it (11216)

On 08/08/2014 at 3:40am - love - by alisaav (woman) - Thailand

Today, my girlfriend's dad returned home from deployment. Being the grade A fucktard that I am, I got flustered and asked, "So um, did you make it back?" He looked me dead in the eyes and said completely deadpan, "No, obviously I died. Moron." FML

#21226906
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33848) - you deserved it (22514)

On 08/01/2014 at 4:45pm - misc - by whoops (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my mom told me my relationship is a joke, because teenagers don't understand the meaning of relationships and commitment. I couldn't help but remind her how she's divorced three separate men to date. She hit me over the head so hard that snot flew out of my nose. FML

#21213268
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53036) - you deserved it (10111)

On 07/18/2014 at 7:06pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me out on a date. He doesn't have a car, but he said he'd borrow transport from his neighbor. He showed up at my house on a ride-on lawn mower. FML

#21213104
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46776) - you deserved it (6627)

On 07/18/2014 at 4:21pm - love - by Lisa (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my wife has a bruise on her cheek from a nasty trip while practicing her yoga. She now thinks it's hilarious to flinch in public when I get near her, and keeps telling people she "walked into a door". I've gotten more dirty looks than I can count. FML

#21192543
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59827) - you deserved it (4621)

On 06/29/2014 at 1:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I came home and found that my home had been robbed. The worst part? One of the thieves took a dump in my toilet and didn't flush. It doesn't even look human. FML

#21184110
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45471) - you deserved it (3523)

On 06/22/2014 at 11:10am - misc - by paywithpoop - United States

Today, my daughter told me that she liked her "other daddy" better. I don't know who's she talking about, but my wife is doing a good job telling her to be quiet. FML

#21177000
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56407) - you deserved it (3943)

On 06/16/2014 at 5:38pm - kids - by FirstDaddy (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my laziness reached an all-time high. I had a dream that I was at school and had spilled all the contents of my backpack onto the floor. I then purposely shook myself out of my sleep to avoid cleaning up the mess in my dream. FML

#21176688
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43975) - you deserved it (9919)

On 06/16/2014 at 12:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I searched up ways to fix my eyebrows since they were so bushy and thick. I took my tweezers and set to work. It went to shit. So now, I have one completely straight eyebrow that makes me look like Bert from Sesame Street and another that's arched like Nina Dobrev's. FML

Today, I was hit in the face by the placenta of a cow that had just given birth. FML

#21158688
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46642) - you deserved it (5186)

On 05/31/2014 at 9:53pm - animals - by disturbed - Ireland

Today, my 5-year-old son woke up early and ran into my bedroom to wake me up. Unfortunately, he did this by jumping onto my bed, slamming his knee into my balls in the process. I had to explain my tears of agony away by claiming I was just so happy to see him. FML

#21149341
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40690) - you deserved it (4147)

On 05/23/2014 at 3:32pm - kids - by todaddy (man) - United Kingdom



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