KimTheInsomniac

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Offline (the 11/09/2014 at 11:38pm)

KimTheInsomniac

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 6 July 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 499
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About KimTheInsomniac : I honestly have no idea what to say about myself other than I love books. And I am a pretty easy going chick

KimTheInsomniac's page activity

Visits<b>Shadowvoid</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 2:47pm<b>Ryiah</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 1:36pm<b>nomad6</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 6:43am<b>silvercamaro</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 7:04pm<b>crunchycheeto99</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 12:29am<b>josh_avila9</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 3:38am<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 12:08pm<b>abombination</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 3:29am<b>Kamon97</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 11:02am<b>shaar</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 12:57am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 4:50pm<b>Adam5858</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 8:09pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 1:21am<b>R3TROxLOV3</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 11:30pm<b>TourettesGuyFTW</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 11:23pm<b>Jellybellybeanz</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 1:29am<b>ThatGuyWithFMLs</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 1:46pm<b>crapmaster3000</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 9:14am

KimTheInsomniac's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of KimTheInsomniac's badges

KimTheInsomniac's favorite FMLs

Today, me and the guy I was dating ran into my sister at the mall. He took one look at her and mumbled, "Great, I chose the ugly one" under his breath. FML

by bambam / 05/12/2014 at 12:01pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, after his sixth beer, my dad looked me in the eye and said "I've never forgiven you for what you did to your mother's vagina". FML

by Anonymous / 01/12/2014 at 1:38am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I watched a little girl laugh while giving bread to some pigeons at a bus stop. A bus then arrived. All the pigeons moved out of the away, except one. Its head got crushed by a wheel, and some blood splattered onto the little girl's shoes, who then screamed. With laughter. FML

by B_and_W / 11/21/2013 at 6:35am / France / Kids

Today, my drunk girlfriend maxed out my credit card, on an "authentic" Jesus Christ autograph on eBay. FML

by maxedoutidiot / 12/12/2012 at 9:14pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I received roughly 50 paper cuts while I was at work. I didn't realize this until after I applied hand sanitizer. FML

by Anonymous / 06/09/2011 at 12:35pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Work

Today, I turned the shower on the hottest setting so it would warm up quickly. I started to sing and dance around the bathroom. I got too carried away and pelvic thrusted the water, which I hadn't turned back down. FML

by Fire_Crotch / 08/14/2010 at 2:27am / Canada (British Columbia) / Health

Today, I asked my boyfriend what he thinks about long term relationships. He said, "Our relationship is kinda like having a dog. Chances are, your dog is going to die pretty quickly, before you do. Dogs and humans just aren't meant to be together forever." He compared me to a dying dog. FML

by wvugirl / 04/19/2009 at 4:49pm / United States (West Virginia) / Love

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML

by FML.. / 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm / China (Hebei) / Intimacy