About KiiwiiRox : I like the idiotic things people do nowadays, I think I've laughed out loud on a lot of these FMLs and most of these commenters have actually made me bust a gut ( not literally) laughing so hard. I try and do my best to give you a good laugh but ehh I suck at it. And I'm barely new to this app so work with me :) thanks for letting me waste 15 seconds of your life reading this :D
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Today, I yet again had to explain to my boyfriend that, yes, I can get pregnant even if I don't actually have an orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24093) - you deserved it (3093)
On 10/04/2012 at 11:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)
Today, I woke up after having a nightmare that my girlfriend broke up with me. Needing reassurance, I told her about it. She became furious with me saying that she'd never do that and called me an "inconsiderate fucking bastard for even thinking that." Then she broke up with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21685) - you deserved it (2332)
On 10/04/2012 at 10:44am - love - by Dave (man) - United States
Today, I found out why my teenage daughter won't brush her teeth properly. Apparently my son convinced her that toothpaste has tons of calories. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16921) - you deserved it (1541)
On 09/28/2012 at 10:25am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, my 5-year-old, overweight Siberian Husky tackled me because he thought that my lipstick was food. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12237) - you deserved it (4077)
On 09/28/2012 at 6:53am - animals - by emilyhendrix0414 - United States
Today, my husband had a temper tantrum because I wouldn't get him a chocolate bar at the store register. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14171) - you deserved it (4015)
On 08/20/2012 at 8:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was at the gym, when a pretty overweight guy started staring and eventually taunting me. Let me tell you, lines such as "Lay off the cake, fatty!" and "I can see your gut hanging out your ass, for fuck's sake!" don't exactly boost one's self-confidence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16628) - you deserved it (1506)
On 08/17/2012 at 12:27pm - misc - by fuckoffandfuckoffagainyoucunt (man) - United Kingdom (Kent)
Today, my mom bitched me out, calling me a selfish pig and saying that the reason I don't have a girlfriend is because I'm so conceited. All of this because I started watching the latest episodes of Breaking Bad without her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15380) - you deserved it (2868)
On 08/17/2012 at 10:27am - misc - by elijah (man) - United States
Today, I was enjoying a romantic cuddle on the couch with my boyfriend, when he suddenly decided to lift up my shirt, stick his face into my boobs, and go all Darth Vader on me. This included heavy breathing and phrases such as, "Amber... I am your boyfriend." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17843) - you deserved it (4590)
On 08/16/2012 at 11:16am - love - by Amberain (woman) - United Kingdom (Halton)
Today, I ordered ramen to go. I looked at my order and discovered a cockroach. Disgusted, I showed it to them, and they apologized by "replacing" it for free. Later on, while I was enjoying the delicious food, I once again discovered a cockroach buried under all the noodles. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20834) - you deserved it (4232)
On 08/16/2012 at 10:30am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Armed Forces Pacific)
Today, my social anxiety hit a new low. I was playing bingo and, although I won, I didn't shout "bingo" because I thought too many people would look at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19892) - you deserved it (6933)
On 08/11/2012 at 10:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Surrey)
Today, I was on the bus when I felt a big yawn coming on, one so big that my mouth stretched and my eyes closed. It was at this point that the strange man beside me decided to lean over at lightning speed and put his tongue in my mouth. Technically it was my first kiss. I'm 21 years old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34900) - you deserved it (4107)
On 08/11/2012 at 6:33am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, my girlfriend received a scam email about her great uncle dying and leaving her money. She not only believed it, but she also used my credit card details for it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19630) - you deserved it (1719)
On 08/11/2012 at 5:13am - money - by scammerssuck - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, I finished my first two weeks as an ice cream truck driver. Now I can't get that annoying ice cream truck music out of my head. It's even in my dreams. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16457) - you deserved it (2731)
On 08/10/2012 at 9:58am - work - by ice cream dude - United States (Colorado)
Today, my boyfriend, who lives 100 miles away and whom I haven't seen in 2 months, told me he was visiting my city with some friends. I assumed this was an opening to an invitation, but no, he just asked me about the best places to get drunk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16487) - you deserved it (2372)
On 08/10/2012 at 8:57am - misc - by blink_kid - United Kingdom (West Lothian)
Today, I discovered that the only thing more disgusting than watching a little kid shove their finger up their nose and eat their fresh green mucus is watching your grandmother do the same. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14932) - you deserved it (1235)
On 08/09/2012 at 10:51am - health - by MsConfusedd - United States (New York)
Monday 17 June 2013
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