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Today, I carved a pumpkin for Halloween. I thought it would be cool to carve my name, and have it shine through onto the wall behind it. I figured that if I carved my name backwards then it would show up correct on the wall. My name's Lana and now my wall says Anal. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6292) - you totally deserved it (24766)
On 10/23/2009 at 1:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to be romantic and get into the hot tub. I was slowly getting into the water when I suddenly slipped. I faceplanted and nearly drowned in three feet of water. My nose bled and we had to get out. Our romantic night was spent doctoring my injuries. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14782) - you totally deserved it (2874)
On 10/23/2009 at 1:18am - misc - by Intoxicunt (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, while trying on a dress, my sister came up behind me and poked my back asking “what have you stuck down your dress?” I hadn’t put anything down the back of my dress; it was just my back fat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13506) - you totally deserved it (5487)
On 10/23/2009 at 12:56am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I threw a paper ball into a recycling bin backwards. I don't know whats more sad: the fact that that was my highlight of my life, or I had been attempting to make that shot every day for 3 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15741) - you totally deserved it (3799)
On 10/23/2009 at 12:47am - misc - by efmylife (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was walking down the street in downtown Charleston where there are a lot of horse-drawn carriage tours and I decided to pick up some litter. Some of it was in a puddle of water, but after I picked up the trash, I realized the puddle was horse urine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13130) - you totally deserved it (4946)
On 10/23/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by Leash (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I was taking the bus to work and it was a rather bumpy ride. The child sitting across from me asked her mom if her chin moves like mine when the bus goes up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13072) - you totally deserved it (3410)
On 10/22/2009 at 8:40pm - misc - by mandy (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, while sitting with my son, an ice cream cone landed on my head from out of no where. I look up to see three children on the balcony above us yelling, "Look we hit the fat lady!" They ran away laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21817) - you totally deserved it (2920)
On 10/22/2009 at 11:47am - misc - by mvgirl - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I told my brother to piss off. He decided to do exactly that, from the balcony onto my lap. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7538) - you totally deserved it (16685)
On 10/21/2009 at 5:03pm - kids - by holy (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I was helping a friend redecorate. Her dad has put up some shelving, that we presumed was stable. It broke, and all the expensive vases and collectables fell to the floor. On instinct, I leapt forward to catch the closest thing. It was not the expensive vase. It was a cactus. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20937) - you totally deserved it (2158)
On 10/21/2009 at 9:54am - misc - by TheSublime (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I was standing in the gas station, pulling out my wallet to pay the $100 of gas I just filled my car with. I opened my wallet and found a note saying "borrowed money for food". FML
I agree, your life sucks (23027) - you totally deserved it (2086)
On 10/21/2009 at 6:05am - money - by Pissed (man) - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)
Today, I was paintballing when I got shot in the stomach and winded. As I was gasping for breath on the ground, someone came up and shot me point blank in my crotch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23875) - you totally deserved it (3783)
On 10/21/2009 at 4:27am - misc - by sore (man) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, my math teacher decided to use my acne as an example of symmetry in front of the whole class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34703) - you totally deserved it (1918)
On 10/21/2009 at 2:59am - health - by acneface (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I got chewed out at work when my supervisor showed up, because my coworkers told my supervisor they couldn't find me for an hour and a half. Why couldn't they find me? Because they'd left to go get coffee. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18112) - you totally deserved it (757)
On 10/21/2009 at 1:40am - work - by wrongtarget (man) - United States
Today, I decided to take a personal day from class and e-mailed all of my profs saying I had flu symptoms. While standing in line at Starbucks later, someone behind me says "Glad you're feeling better. Hope you can attend class tomorrow, we'll discuss lying." It was my Ethics professor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3254) - you totally deserved it (29226)
On 10/20/2009 at 10:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I saw my son. I didn't know I had a son. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23652) - you totally deserved it (12355)
On 10/20/2009 at 8:44pm - kids - by Raiders4ever (man) - United States (Virginia)
