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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 8 January 1988 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3645
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Kevlar :

Kevlar's page activity

Visits<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 1:01am<b>petrapumpkinhed</b> - the 05/24/2010 at 9:28am<b>DarkMirror</b> - the 05/30/2009 at 11:10pm<b>Holybatman</b> - the 05/24/2009 at 1:41am<b>floatingdonut08</b> - the 05/10/2009 at 3:10pm<b>iKaite</b> - the 05/08/2009 at 8:21am<b>lsutiget1999</b> - the 05/07/2009 at 2:17pm<b>vannesa</b> - the 05/03/2009 at 7:13am<b>betsymonty</b> - the 05/03/2009 at 2:51am<b>jokerssmile</b> - the 04/26/2009 at 8:08pm<b>omggsucks</b> - the 04/25/2009 at 3:35pm<b>Serial</b> - the 04/24/2009 at 9:01pm<b>jessxoxo28</b> - the 04/23/2009 at 3:31pm<b>kk</b> - the 04/23/2009 at 4:30am<b>Alexander81</b> - the 04/20/2009 at 7:48pm<b>xsydbabyx</b> - the 04/20/2009 at 7:31pm<b>Julle</b> - the 04/20/2009 at 11:04am<b>not_ur_mexican</b> - the 04/19/2009 at 12:10am

Kevlar's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Kevlar's favorite FMLs

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

by Dunzo15 / 05/02/2009 at 2:28am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I was in a shopping center when I went to the toilet. I came out, washed my hands and suddenly got a massive itch in my crotch. Without thinking I itched it. I then had to walk around the center with a wet hand print on my crotch. FML

by maddie94 / 04/27/2009 at 5:14am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought a box of Fruit Loops. When I got home, I noticed a free prize would be in the box. I sifted through the box, looking for the small toy. It wasn't in there. I don't know what is more sad, the fact that I got ripped off by a children's cereal or that I'm 21 and upset by it. FML

by ahhnotoy / 04/26/2009 at 10:29pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got kicked in the face at a soccer game. Everybody clapped. FML

by Tal / 04/26/2009 at 11:14am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I didn't wear my contacts. Determined to prove to my friends I didn't need them, I read all the signs in sight. I couldn't read a particular one, so I began to walk closer. Suddenly I fell on my face, bruising my cheekbone. The sign said: "Caution: Watch Your Step." FML

by notexactly / 04/23/2009 at 3:36am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my son's soccer game. I cheered his name at the top my lungs and waved with a grin on my face. I saw him whisper something to a team mate so I watched the film my husband took later that night. His friend asked, "Who is that?" and my son replied, "I don't know some fat bitch." FML

by Anonymous / 04/22/2009 at 5:46pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I told my morbidly obese teacher that he had mustard on his chin. He tried to wipe it off and I said without thinking "No, your other chin." FML

by anonymous / 04/21/2009 at 1:42am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend was pulled over and told to get out of the car. The officer motioned for me to get out of the car too so I reached behind me to get my shoes. He then pointed his gun at my face and frantically asked my friend if I had a gun. My friend calmly replied "No, but shoot him anyway." FML

by Daniel_rules / 04/17/2009 at 1:02pm / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, I was home alone while my mom went out to dinner. I decided to hop in the shower, and I noticed my mom left her douche in there. After, I texted her telling her what I found and that it was gross. Her response? "It's not gross. It came from my vagina, like you and your sister." FML

by duuuuude / 04/16/2009 at 11:08pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Health

Today, my car got a flat tire. I jacked up my car, removed the flat and went to get my spare out of the trunk. Where my spare is supposed to be I found a note. It said "You're a bitch - John". John is my ex boyfriend. He borrowed my car the day we broke up, apparently he stole my spare tire too. FML

by jacked / 04/16/2009 at 10:38pm / United States (Louisiana) / Love

Today, I was eating some left over Easter peanut MandMs at work, when I exclaimed "oh cool, they have E's on them for Easter". It took me a couple of minutes, but I eventually realized that I was looking at a regular MandM sideways. Definitely explains my coworkers' uncontrollable laughter. FML

by StewPit / 04/16/2009 at 3:44pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I changed the locks on my apartment so my crazy ex girlfriend couldn't get in. I went to her house to return her house key. I accidentally gave her the key to my new locks, and can't find her old house key. Now I need her to come let me in to my own house. FML

by xnickx / 04/16/2009 at 10:47am / United States (Nebraska) / Love

Today, I asked my boyfriend why he dates me. He immediately responded, "Well, TV shows are boring and predictable, so you're a good source of fresh and interesting drama." FML

by dramaqueen / 04/14/2009 at 12:44am / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, a woman drove through my house. She was texting and eating watermelon at the same time. I didn't know that was even possible, but now my house is condemned. FML

by Fitz / 04/12/2009 at 9:53am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, my girlfriend's friend told her she had seen me shopping with a cute girl. When I came back home my girlfriend punched me in the face and asked who the girl was. Apparently her friend didn't tell her the cute girl was my three years old niece. I lost a tooth because of that punch. FML

by GotPunched / 04/11/2009 at 2:36am / Finland (Western Finland) / Love