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Kels789

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Kels789

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 14 August 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 242
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Kels789's page activity

Visits<b>lonelyblonde</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 3:27pm<b>ernievaldez12</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 5:08pm<b>TheNiceOne</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 10:55pm<b>michaelaranda</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 11:19pm<b>QualityChrisTime</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 12:53am<b>LuluRichards</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 3:30pm<b>Killerbee442</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 7:47pm<b>dre82</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 8:07am<b>ComaWhiteLove</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 11:55pm<b>chargers2588</b> - the 09/05/2013 at 10:19am<b>aLiYaaH</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 8:06am<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 4:07am

Kels789's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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Kels789's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter's teacher called me, very concerned, because my child told the whole class she's not virgin anymore. The word is "vegan", honey. FML

#21253313
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38191) - you deserved it (3395)

On 09/06/2014 at 9:57pm - kids - by healthfreak - United States (Georgia)

Today, this weird kid in class asked me on a date. He claims to be a werewolf. His excuse for not being able to turn into one? A "rare disease." His excuse for everyone rejecting him? "Friend-zoning bitches." I was the last resort even for a jackoff "nice guy" werewolf. FML

#20829503
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36576) - you deserved it (3281)

On 08/09/2013 at 6:13pm - misc - by WHAT A NICE GUY YOU ARE, SIR SHITSPAWN!!!1! (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that my mom gives my brother tips on how to hurt my feelings the most. FML

#20107287
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28557) - you deserved it (1839)

On 10/08/2012 at 11:08am - misc - by LovedByFamily (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, my husband had a temper tantrum because I wouldn't get him a chocolate bar at the store register. FML

#20031596
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19275) - you deserved it (5210)

On 08/20/2012 at 8:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I purposely wore a red shirt to Target just so people would talk to me. FML

#19601147
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23847) - you deserved it (9927)

On 05/10/2012 at 2:44am - misc - by reddd - United States

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML

#19525973
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23538) - you deserved it (2667)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:22am - intimacy - by intheairtonight (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML

#19330918
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47131) - you deserved it (4591)

On 03/23/2012 at 1:55am - intimacy - by mrricecakes (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was using a restroom when I heard someone sneeze. I said, "Bless you." It happened again about three times, so I repeated myself each time. I then noticed it was an automatic air freshener. FML

#18981474
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15181) - you deserved it (21861)

On 02/03/2012 at 12:25am - misc - by coleslaw (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to eat the orange I'd brought to work, but couldn't find it. After minutes searching, I found it. Nailed to the ceiling. FML

#18517264
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25090) - you deserved it (2490)

On 12/15/2011 at 1:57am - work - by Username - United States (California)

Today, my five year old daughter came up to me and told me she wanted to be a nun. When I asked why, she replied, "So I won't get my heart broken by a boy." FML

#16607799
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36289) - you deserved it (7123)

On 06/11/2011 at 7:12am - kids - by julia - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML

#15514877
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41967) - you deserved it (28639)

On 03/27/2011 at 2:09pm - misc - by rowie1311 (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, my boyfriend told everyone I queef during sex. Even his parents are calling me "Cooter Pooter." FML

#12816242
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34077) - you deserved it (6285)

On 08/30/2010 at 2:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had a date with a girl at a fancy restaurant. In the middle of it she says, "Excuse me, I have to use the bathroom." I watched her get up, walk over to the door, leave, get in her car, and drive away. FML

#11045008
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39005) - you deserved it (5453)

On 06/07/2010 at 10:21pm - love - by Th3BaconNinja (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I rejected my wife for sex. She then started to masturbate next to me. I got an erection. She then rejected me for sex. FML

#6927698
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6322) - you deserved it (70817)

On 12/24/2009 at 8:10pm - intimacy - by paidback - United States



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