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KellyIly

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KellyIly

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KellyIly's favorite FMLs

Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML

#12760106
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33210) - you deserved it (3238)

On 08/26/2010 at 7:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex in a rarely used room at school. We got carried away and found ourselves locked in. We slept there overnight. We woke up when the cleaning lady found us the next morning and were greeted by worried parents and school staff. FML

#12758397
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11654) - you deserved it (46471)

On 08/26/2010 at 5:17pm - intimacy - by Eeeek (woman) - Bulgaria (Varna)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend from the top of a bungee jumping platform at an amusement park. I yelled out, "WILL YOU MARRY ME?" from the platform, pointing her out. Turns out, I was pointing at the wrong girl. My girlfriend was very angry and ran away when the wrong girl yelled, "Yes!" FML

#12757529
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34316) - you deserved it (14452)

On 08/26/2010 at 4:06pm - love - by Ido (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to pay my vehicle registration in person to avoid paying the $10.00 online service fee. After a long wait, I came out to find a $15.00 parking ticket on my car. FML

#12754430
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14708) - you deserved it (20474)

On 08/26/2010 at 11:09am - money - by avalanche719 (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I had to use my butthole to negotiate with my husband so I can get a new tattoo. FML

#12753768
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13717) - you deserved it (47843)

On 08/26/2010 at 9:32am - intimacy - by H8TR (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was walking with the dog. I was throwing a stick in the lake so he could get it (he loves swimming). A friend called me. After I was done calling another friend came by, and we went talking for a while. When my dog barked, I accidentally threw my iPhone in the water instead of his stick. FML

#12753740
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13941) - you deserved it (36832)

On 08/26/2010 at 9:27am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, I fell down a flight of stairs while delivering a pizza, and severely sprained my ankle. The guy looked at me lying there, and shut the door in my face. I then got told to "Suck it up, Princess" by my manager. FML

Today, my date and I went to the movies. After the date, we were both on an instant chat room at our homes. Her personal message displayed "I think I love my ex again." FML

#12746191
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25585) - you deserved it (2613)

On 08/25/2010 at 10:09pm - love - by bevo - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I made a mistake at work that got 7 people fired. I'm scared to leave the office because they're all outside. FML

#12740190
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15242) - you deserved it (64266)

On 08/25/2010 at 3:13pm - work - by Joel - United States (California)

Today, I was working as a camp counselor helping a five year old girl. I heard her mumble, "My grandpa is getting married on Saturday." I enthusiastically replied and told her how exciting that was! Only after did I realize that she said 'buried'. FML

#12738391
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26318) - you deserved it (8255)

On 08/25/2010 at 12:32pm - misc - by counselor - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I decided to wax my own eyebrows with a Do It Yourself kit from the pharmacy. I'm now missing half of my right eyebrow. FML

#12736614
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9587) - you deserved it (37943)

On 08/25/2010 at 9:10am - misc - by Eyebrowsgone - United States (California)

Today, I swerved off the road and hit a tree in order to avoid hitting a dog that came out of nowhere. Don't worry, I didn't hit him. The person behind me did, though. FML

#12726945
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33816) - you deserved it (4484)

On 08/24/2010 at 8:48pm - animals - by vstan (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was enjoying a nice shower in the morning. While I was massaging the shampoo out of my hair, I saw the gardener walking past my bathroom window, yelling "Good morning" and waving in my direction. My left boob politely waved back at him. FML

#12726164
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13555) - you deserved it (24229)

On 08/24/2010 at 8:08pm - intimacy - by AlexaSt2611 (woman) - Paraguay (Central)

Today, I got a text from my boyfriend whilst on the train home from spending the weekend with him at his Grandparents house. It said 'Gran says to tell you that the bin beside the toilet is actually for storing spare shampoos and tooth brushes, so could you not put your tampons in it next time?' FML

#12725803
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32224) - you deserved it (7750)

On 08/24/2010 at 7:46pm - love - by DyingOfShame (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I saw two cute girls walking my way as I was parking my car. Trying to impress them, I got out and attempted to coolly walk to the sidewalk. I tripped on the curb, scraped both my knees, and was laughed at all the way until I got back inside my car. FML

#12724664
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10954) - you deserved it (31312)

On 08/24/2010 at 6:36pm - love - by iammike (man) - United States (Washington)



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