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KellyIly

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KellyIly
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5009
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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KellyIly's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her. She looked right at me and said "Bring it." FML

#13026235
417 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28829) - you deserved it (26807)

On 09/12/2010 at 9:38pm - kids - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, at school, everybody wanted to be my partner for a project. This surprised me because nobody ever wants to be with me. Turns out when I was absent, my teacher promised that whoever was my partner would get extra points on the project. FML

#12990617
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28782) - you deserved it (2198)

On 09/10/2010 at 2:09pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that I drunkenly texted my boss yesterday asking for nude pictures. He sent them. I'm afraid to go to work tomorrow. FML

#12967216
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12859) - you deserved it (32818)

On 09/08/2010 at 8:11pm - intimacy - by WTF?!?! - United States (Florida)

Today, my email got hacked and sent all my contacts something for Viagra. My husband thinks I really sent it to him on purpose and now won't even talk to me. FML

#12899582
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22115) - you deserved it (2558)

On 09/04/2010 at 9:24am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got grounded because I have a picture on facebook in which I'm touching the crotch of a cardboard cut-out of Obama. My parents insist the FBI will see that and I'll end up in jail. My parents are crazy. FML

Today, I was forced to spend an extra $318 for another plane ticket to Dallas. The ticket wasn't for my daughter, my mom, or my sister, but for the quarter of my butt that apparently needs its own seat. FML

#12841369
346 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15536) - you deserved it (7576)

On 08/31/2010 at 5:40pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, after my husband's phone buzzed like crazy all morning, I decided to pick it up and see what all the fuss was about. He had three new picture messages from his "boss", naked and strapped to a chair with the caption, "Are you still coming over tonight?" We've been married for nine years and have two children. FML

#12838933
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54709) - you deserved it (3816)

On 08/31/2010 at 2:07pm - intimacy - by ashlee (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend of three years proposed to me. He brought me to our favorite restaurant and ordered expensive champagne. It was all very romantic, until he got on one knee and I farted out of surprise. Loudly. FML

#12837026
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36163) - you deserved it (7382)

On 08/31/2010 at 10:48am - love - by maebyf - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while getting on the subway, I tripped over the gap between the train and the platform. My flip-flop caught on the edge, and fell into the gap. I had to walk home with one flip-flop. FML

#12833502
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20593) - you deserved it (8333)

On 08/31/2010 at 2:14am - misc - by grossfoot (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I talked to my boyfriend's dad for the first time. One of the first things that he said to me was, "So, I hear you're a screamer." FML

#12832697
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33474) - you deserved it (6226)

On 08/31/2010 at 1:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was at a tennis match and it was really hot. I took off my shirt to cool down. A member of the staff then tapped me on the shoulder and told me that my "bare breasts might offend someone." I'm a man. FML

#12832622
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22035) - you deserved it (13393)

On 08/31/2010 at 1:15am - misc - by bennyp77 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went with my family to go see a notoriously creepy abandoned house. We noticed the people had left a lot of stuff behind so we loaded up the car with books, records, etc. As we were leaving, we saw the family who lived there drive up. I robbed a house with my grandma. FML

#12826740
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9472) - you deserved it (42502)

On 08/30/2010 at 8:04pm - misc - by tikizombie (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I finally worked up the courage to play my friends the demo CD that I've spent all summer recording. I didn't tell them it was me. Not even 10 seconds into the first song, my best friend asked me to turn it off because it sucked. FML

#12826114
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22293) - you deserved it (5572)

On 08/30/2010 at 7:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was moving out of my old place. While walking around to make sure I would get my damage deposit back, I stepped on my roommate's lipstick and smeared it all over the white carpet. Then, I tripped on the phone cord and ripped the whole thing out of the wall. FML

#12823670
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27204) - you deserved it (7016)

On 08/30/2010 at 4:10pm - misc - by tikizombie (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I finally decided to do regular biology rather than honors biology, thinking honors would be too hard. My first day in regular biology, my lab partner asked me whether a rock was alive or not. FML



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