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Keiren

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Keiren
  • Town/Country : Nowhere Land, United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 18 July 1977 (36 years)
  • Number of visits : 1707
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Keiren : Nothing to see here, move along.

Keiren's last visitors

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Keiren's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of Keiren's badges

Keiren's favorite FMLs

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

#19463606
582 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11630) - you deserved it (51472) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, my son had to call me from his school's principal's office because he was disrupting his health class by laughing whenever the teacher said "sex". My son is 16. FML

#19453519
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21631) - you deserved it (3436)

On 04/12/2012 at 12:18am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I got home to find our house broken into. Among other things, the thieves took our television, my laptop and several pieces of expensive jewelry. Also missing was my daughter's My Little Pony collection. I think we were robbed by a Brony. FML

#19450814
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18301) - you deserved it (1237)

On 04/11/2012 at 5:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my daughter sat me down for a long talk. It turns out that she thinks she is the Chosen One. FML

Today, while lying in bed, I heard a strange grating noise coming from the hallway. After recovering from my initial assumption that it was a poltergeist come to murder me and steal my liver, I went out to investigate. It was there that I discovered my bulldog casually eating into the wall. FML

Today, I got mugged at Disney World, the happiest place on Earth. FML

#19434352
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31511) - you deserved it (2906)

On 04/09/2012 at 1:15am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realized the reason my 20-year-old daughter has been so moody and aggressive is because she missed the promotional My Little Pony toys at McDonald's. FML

#19430484
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19819) - you deserved it (4403)

On 04/08/2012 at 2:55pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my four-year-old son decided to bite my butt during prayer at church. The entire sanctuary heard me instinctively swear at him. FML

#19401263
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12207) - you deserved it (20605)

On 04/03/2012 at 2:19pm - kids - by potatoebee - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I called an airline's customer service line. Apparently the way that they deal with uncommon problems is by having someone put you on hold for twenty minutes, answer and yell something unintelligible at you, put you back on hold, and repeat. This went on for over an hour. FML

#19397003
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12684) - you deserved it (1108)

On 04/02/2012 at 7:40pm - money - by unfriendlyskies (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my daughter decided to wake me up by putting the vacuum in my hair and turning it on. FML

#19393049
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22041) - you deserved it (2284)

On 04/02/2012 at 1:38am - kids - by baldspot (woman) - Australia

Today, I accused my son of faking being sick. He then blew chunks all over me. FML

#19318105
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5615) - you deserved it (43840)

On 03/21/2012 at 12:06am - kids - by George Saunders - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I told my daughter that she should put some love into her cooking. She started kissing the ingredients. FML

#19305380
7 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16134) - you deserved it (11610)

On 03/19/2012 at 12:59am - kids - by FoodyFood (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my 8-year-old niece corrected my spelling via text message. FML

#19227628
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5614) - you deserved it (22144)

On 03/06/2012 at 3:41pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while babysitting, one of the boys fell on an exposed pipe and broke it. It spewed water five feet into the air, spread water across four rooms, and completely soaked another of the boys. Their parents had only left fifteen minutes before. FML

#19112192
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20008) - you deserved it (2388)

On 02/19/2012 at 12:49am - kids - by CamoElla - United States



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