Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Kefka91

Search for a member

Kefka91
  • Town/Country : Amboy, Illinois, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 13 October 1991 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 1643
  • Number of comments : 108
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About Kefka91 : Hello, um... Yeah...
I like anime, video games, drawing, music, guys, movies, furries, reading, and being grammatically correct.

Message me if you want. I'm a pretty chill person.

Kefka91's last visitors

cwl727Wild_MarcoAmelia_Jones237BudderchookOwlnight321Esels_Hinternlittlem91slenderpgirlRababcoForbiddenDestiny

Kefka91's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Kefka91's badges

Kefka91's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband called me to the bedroom to show me something. This "something" was him demonstrating his seemingly well-trained ability to accurately type out a sentence on my phone using nothing but his erect penis. FML

#18531722
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28383) - you deserved it (5164)

On 12/16/2011 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by anne (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my landlord came to my apartment because of complaints from my neighbors, saying that animals are not allowed inside. Turns out my roommate makes cat-noises when she's bored. My landlord still doesn't believe me. FML

#18501899
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22679) - you deserved it (1746)

On 12/13/2011 at 8:57am - misc - by Anonymous - Norway (Sogn og Fjordane)

Today, I saw a quarter in my poop. My friends say I do stupid things when I get drunk. Apparently, eating change is one of them. FML

#18500551
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8027) - you deserved it (31043)

On 12/13/2011 at 1:32am - health - by photomark - United States

Today, I found out that if a cop asks you if you have any weapons, and you reply by saying "only these guns" while flexing your biceps, they won't take it very well. And neither will the cops down at the station. FML

#18444451
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10329) - you deserved it (41030)

On 12/06/2011 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML

#18406735
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37671) - you deserved it (2853)

On 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by unknown52 - Netherlands (Overijssel)

Today, I was getting intimate with my husband on our anniversary day. He climbed on top of me and firmly placed his penis on my nose. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he burst into laughter and said I looked just like Squidward. FML

#18083202
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34146) - you deserved it (3973)

On 10/26/2011 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML

#17586114
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27797) - you deserved it (5039)

On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my friend sent me an online money transfer. After forgetting the password and locking myself out of my account, I had to phone up the bank and have it reset. I was prompted to answer the security question, which was "What, what?" I had to say "In the butt." to get my money. FML

#16661334
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11504) - you deserved it (55302)

On 06/14/2011 at 1:57pm - money - by notinthebutt (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while I was sleeping, my girlfriend took my phone and set the ringtone to a bloodcurdling scream. I found this out when I received a call while driving to work and, thinking someone was being murdered in my backseat, I panicked and swerved into a parked car. FML

#16448607
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32001) - you deserved it (4042)

On 06/01/2011 at 7:53am - misc - by iscreamforicecream (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, against my wishes, my family and I went swimming with sharks. While in the shark cage, a shark got within a few feet of us. My cowardly bowels objected and caused me to shit myself. FML

#16403007
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32478) - you deserved it (9486)

On 05/29/2011 at 2:22pm - animals - by Brie - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were taking a shower together. We were fooling around when she takes the shower head and starts spraying my penis with it. I asked her "what are you doing?" Her response: "I'm watering it to make it grow." FML

#16399874
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53277) - you deserved it (9957)

On 05/29/2011 at 10:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were taking a shower together. We were fooling around when she takes the shower head and starts spraying my penis with it. I asked her "what are you doing?" Her response: "I'm watering it to make it grow." FML

#16399874
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53277) - you deserved it (9957)

On 05/29/2011 at 10:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I worked up the courage to confess my feelings to this girl I'm crazy about. I even wrote and recorded a song for her. Instead of listening to it, she gave it to her ex boyfriend who responded to my heartfelt words by headbutting me. FML

#16386791
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28710) - you deserved it (6427)

On 05/28/2011 at 12:44pm - love - by StratMan (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I got so stressed about my upcoming final exams that, in the silent section of the library, I had a panic attack and almost passed out. No one helped me. 3 people shushed me. FML

#16384054
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29348) - you deserved it (8386)

On 05/28/2011 at 8:20am - work - by justletitbeover (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I noticed my hidden porn folder on my laptop had been renamed to "LOL". I live with my teenage daughter, and no one else. FML

#16383481
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13516) - you deserved it (53473)

On 05/28/2011 at 5:24am - intimacy - by redhanded (man) - United States (Illinois)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: