About KayleeFrye : I love reading the funny sh*t that happens in peoples' lives. I hate the bigotry, meanness, and ignorance of many of the comments. As a teacher, I am a bit of a grammar snob, but I try to refrain from crossing the line into Grammar Nazi.
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KayleeFrye's favorite FMLs
Today, I decided to make a toaster scramble. I thought it was bad enough when the pastry fell through the grate in the toaster over. Then it burst into flames. After 5 minutes of fanning the smoke away from the smoke detector, it still went off. Now my entire dorm building is outside in a snowstorm. FML
by im_a_mocker / 01/28/2009 at 6:35pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend showed his mother photos of me. He told her that he thinks I'm pretty. She said that I look like a celebrity from her country (Korea). Flattered, I online searched this celebrity, and turns out she is a local porn star who's undergone multiple cosmetic surgeries. FML
by sigh / 01/23/2009 at 8:55pm / United States (New York) / Love
Today, I was hitting on a girl that was getting ready to walk into the same class as I. We were waiting outside the room, and I told her that I heard the Professor for the course was a total bitch. We walked into the room. I sat down in a desk. She stood behind the podium. FML
by footinmouth / 01/21/2009 at 6:15pm / United States (Iowa) / Love
Today, I was hanging out with a couple of friends and one of them tells a funny story about how he filled a condom with syrup and put it in his friend's mouth while he was asleep. Me with my big mouth starts to say, "Condoms taste na--" and stopped myself as everyone started laughing at me. FML
by jen / 01/15/2009 at 7:39pm / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous
Today, well, last night, I told my girlfriend that I'm a light sleeper, and that the slightest disturbance will wake me up. As a result, this morning when I looked in the mirror I noticed a bunch of stuff written all over my body, like "You see, you didn't wake up!", "Nor now!". FML
Today, a girl in my class turned around and said, "Wow, you've got your photo on a rubber! That's amazing!" The rubber was designed to look like a £10 note, and the picture was of the Queen of England. FML
by Elizabeth / 12/11/2008 at 12:13am / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband invited his boss and his wife to dinner. During the meal, I tasted the wine and apologised for its bad quality, somewhat annoyed: "Dont drink that, I'll go and look for another bottle." Unfortunately, it was our guests who had brought the wine in question. FML
by j0j0 / 11/18/2008 at 10:44pm / France (Aquitaine) / Kids
by Dothy / 11/17/2008 at 4:54am / France (Aquitaine) / Work
Today, I baby sat a four-year old kid, because his parents went partying. Once in bed, he yells "I want to go party!!". After 3 or 4 times, I told him to go to sleep. 2 hours later, wet bed. "Told you I want to go potty!!" FML
by Tara / 10/31/2008 at 3:06am / Sweden (Blekinge Lan) / Kids
by loser / 10/29/2008 at 7:08am / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Love
- 1Today, it's been six months since my husband and I have miscarried our daughter who we named Hana… 2Today, I discovered, after years of being grounded for losing my belongings, that I didn't actually… 3Today, eight tornados hit the town where I live. The only person who tried to get a hold of me and…