Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Kataclysm97

Offline (12 hours ago) | Search for a member

Kataclysm97

59Fucked!

Kataclysm97Kataclysm97
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 25 November 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3408
  • Number of comments : 53
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Kataclysm97 : I am awfully random so often I don't make much potatoes. If that's a problem for anyone, I recommend clicking away right meow. Seriously guys, I don't know how much unimoose-landshark awesomeness you can handle. Honestly though, I'm nice to people who are nice to me unless that someone is being a PEDOBEAR! I know you people are out there. STAHP IT! Shoot me a message IF YOU DARE! >:3

Kataclysm97's page activity

Visits<b>dakatabg</b> - yesterday at 5:35pm<b>Contiinuous</b> - yesterday at 1:36pm<b>RuBloKon</b> - yesterday at 11:01am<b>Gaernem</b> - yesterday at 9:19am<b>James_is_Mexican</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 3:58pm<b>killer0689</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 10:56am<b>Mons</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 2:02am<b>Dougie_Bee</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 5:06pm<b>JulietVoltora</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 2:20pm<b>natalea_rae</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 7:34pm<b>Radgears47</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 4:54pm<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 11:30am<b>mein_blut69</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 1:26pm<b>Xx_Slayer_xX</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 11:51pm<b>steveykinz0967</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 6:25pm<b>dakotadavisbruh</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 11:04pm<b>Domino3k</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 1:53pm<b>sweetgirl89</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 3:27am

Fucked!<b>James_is_Mexican</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 10:52am<b>Dougie_Bee</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 11:06pm<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 5:30pm<b>Contiinuous</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 9:34am<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 12:41pm<b>Ethan_Anonymous</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 12:53pm<b>RickySleeves</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 3:31am<b>TheBeast26</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 3:23am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 12:07am<b>sdroze1389</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 3:58pm<b>dakotadavisbruh</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 1:00pm<b>scott421</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 4:10pm<b>rkdstp1995</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 4:11pm<b>c_wyld</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 5:14am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 4:28am<b>steveO95</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 5:07am<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 8:08am<b>FreshToDeathEf</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 7:48pm

Kataclysm97's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Kataclysm97's badges

Kataclysm97's favorite FMLs

Today, in my film class, we were watching Schindler's List. At least, we tried. The moron next to me kept interrupting the most intense scenes with a very loud, "I don't get it." Not only did she break the focus of the class, but we had to keep stopping the movie to explain it to her. FML

#21412612
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21670) - you deserved it (1437)

On 05/19/2015 at 3:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was fired for not asking a senior citizen for proof that he was over 21 and legally allowed to purchase alcohol. When I told my manager he was clearly over 21, he replied, "But what if he WASN'T?" FML

#21412440
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26662) - you deserved it (2832)

On 05/19/2015 at 7:43am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I bought an expensive video game and decided to show it off and post a photo of it on Instagram. When I got home to play it, it rejected my activation key. I then realised it was showing in the Instagram post. FML

#21411390
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11245) - you deserved it (39364)

On 05/17/2015 at 9:09am - misc - by PISSED OFF - Australia

Today, a couple asked me donate my eggs so they could start a family. When I refused, I was called heartless by my ex-husband and the woman he cheated on me with for over two years. FML

#21410986
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33647) - you deserved it (2011)

On 05/16/2015 at 1:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, my mom cleaned out my bank account, saying my "no-good dad" owes her child support and that she'll get it one way or another. FML

#21410631
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30177) - you deserved it (1794)

On 05/15/2015 at 6:26pm - money - by that was mine - United States (New Jersey)

Today, at work, I was about to close a big sale, when a coworker rushed over and said there was a call for me in the office. He heavily implied my mom had died, and I rushed out. After I figured out there was no call and that my mom was fine, he'd already stolen my sale and the commission. FML

#21410601
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33502) - you deserved it (1982)

On 05/15/2015 at 4:58pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my brother and I had a long argument. He believes wholeheartedly that pineapples are not actually fruits, but berries. When I showed him a google search, he accused me of "faking" it. FML

#21410455
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22650) - you deserved it (3439)

On 05/15/2015 at 9:58am - misc - by Anon - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my 18-year-old boyfriend freaked out and kept asking me if I was sure I wouldn't get pregnant, because I forgot to take my birth control pill last night. We didn't actually have sex; he apparently thought me simply missing the pill would magically get me pregnant. The hell? FML

#21408378
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30360) - you deserved it (4731)

On 05/11/2015 at 1:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Midtjylland)

Today, my girlfriend and I somehow got into the conversation of what the weirdest thing we have ever found in food was. She said she found paper in her fortune cookie; she was serious. FML

#21406274
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28425) - you deserved it (2496)

On 05/07/2015 at 3:52pm - misc - by Random737193 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was sitting in McDonald's. A lady came up to me and started complaining about the bad service, and asked for the manager. I told her that I didn't work there. "But you must, someone that fat has to work here!" FML

#21401411
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30906) - you deserved it (4538)

On 04/28/2015 at 9:36pm - misc - by fatty - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I asked my class to name some West African countries. Several of them thought Ebola was a country. I teach an AP history class. FML

#21400396
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33843) - you deserved it (3644)

On 04/27/2015 at 12:58am - work - by advanced history teacher (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while with a large group of friends, my best friend started talking about my struggles with dating and intimacy. I quietly asked her to stop talking about it, as it was personal and I wasn't comfortable with everyone else knowing. Her response? "Um, it's really none of your business." FML

Today, I overheard my uncle talking about me to his friends. Nothing serious, just that he'd fuck me senseless if we weren't related. FML

#21399079
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36981) - you deserved it (2442)

On 04/24/2015 at 3:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Laois)

Today, my boyfriend told me he traded nude pictures I sent him for a costume piece in an internet game. He told me I should be okay with this, because, "It's a rare piece." FML

#21398399
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32713) - you deserved it (6237)

On 04/23/2015 at 9:16am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend told me he traded nude pictures I sent him for a costume piece in an internet game. He told me I should be okay with this, because, "It's a rare piece." FML

#21398399
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32713) - you deserved it (6237)

On 04/23/2015 at 9:16am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: