Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Kataclysm97

Online | Search for a member

Kataclysm97

50Fucked!

Kataclysm97Kataclysm97
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 25 November 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3258
  • Number of comments : 53
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Kataclysm97 : I am awfully random so often I don't make much potatoes. If that's a problem for anyone, I recommend clicking away right meow. Seriously guys, I don't know how much unimoose-landshark awesomeness you can handle. Honestly though, I'm nice to people who are nice to me unless that someone is being a PEDOBEAR! I know you people are out there. STAHP IT! Shoot me a message IF YOU DARE! >:3

Kataclysm97's page activity

Visits<b>killer0689</b> - 2 hours ago<b>scott421</b> - 3 hours ago<b>michaelm1290</b> - 14 hours ago<b>dakotadavisbruh</b> - 22 hours ago<b>big_papa_</b> - 23 hours ago<b>lagreeni</b> - yesterday at 6:11pm<b>rkdstp1995</b> - yesterday at 4:53pm<b>sdroze1389</b> - yesterday at 9:57am<b>SweetIam</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 10:59pm<b>maxyutd</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 10:30pm<b>daveyyyyh</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 7:27pm<b>BeautifulLiesx</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 4:04pm<b>http_kxthryn</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 1:34pm<b>munzapoppa</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 12:07pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 6:39pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 3:41pm<b>c_wyld</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 3:53am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 10:20pm

Fucked!<b>sdroze1389</b> - yesterday at 3:58pm<b>dakotadavisbruh</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 1:00pm<b>scott421</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 4:10pm<b>rkdstp1995</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 4:11pm<b>c_wyld</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 5:14am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 4:28am<b>steveO95</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 5:07am<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 8:08am<b>FreshToDeathEf</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 7:48pm<b>big_papa_</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 4:31am<b>zjay</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 10:08pm<b>PITSB</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 4:55am<b>Windows_98</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 4:16pm<b>Xx_Slayer_xX</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 11:39pm<b>rob02</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 12:57pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 12:35pm<b>ndnpride88</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 4:32am<b>loche123</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 3:25pm

Kataclysm97's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Kataclysm97's badges

Kataclysm97's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend told me he traded nude pictures I sent him for a costume piece in an internet game. He told me I should be okay with this, because, "It's a rare piece." FML

#21398399
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25175) - you deserved it (4784)

On 04/23/2015 at 9:16am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend told me he traded nude pictures I sent him for a costume piece in an internet game. He told me I should be okay with this, because, "It's a rare piece." FML

#21398399
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25175) - you deserved it (4784)

On 04/23/2015 at 9:16am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boss gave me the job of dealing with the guys doing the roofing at our store. His reasoning is that since we're all Hispanic, I'm perfect for the job because "You guys all know each other." FML

#21397904
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23763) - you deserved it (2051)

On 04/22/2015 at 11:06am - work - by -_- (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my religious girlfriend convinced me to let her take my virginity. A few hours later, she broke up with me, crying and saying I was going to hell for having sex before marriage. But apparently she isn't, and she can't be with someone who "tempts" her. FML

#21397889
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26177) - you deserved it (2347)

On 04/22/2015 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I came out as bisexual to my 17-year-old sister. She was quiet for a second, then told me she knows for sure I only have "girl parts". I had to explain to her the difference between being bi and being a hermaphrodite. FML

#21397585
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25168) - you deserved it (2754)

On 04/21/2015 at 7:00pm - intimacy - by Notthatone (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my mother-in-law asked me when my fiance and I were going to start having children. When I told her we weren't planning on having any, she went on a tirade about how selfish and cold I am for denying her precious grandchildren. Now she hates me. FML

#21397047
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24867) - you deserved it (3622)

On 04/20/2015 at 7:55pm - kids - by ChildFree (woman) - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)

Today, my boyfriend let out a horrible fart in the middle of sex. Even though it was clearly his, he gave me disgusted look, called me a dirty bitch, then kept going. Let's just say I didn't finish. FML

#21396154
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28117) - you deserved it (2636)

On 04/19/2015 at 10:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I explained to my sister that the reason she isn't getting job offers is probably because her résumé is in Comic Sans and contains TXT language and a lot of typos. She thanked me for my help by calling me a "clueless horse-fucker" and telling me to shut my mouth. FML

#21387066
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26970) - you deserved it (2009)

On 04/03/2015 at 2:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my sister shot my dog with my airsoft gun. When I told my parents, she put on the fakest sobbing I've ever heard, said she didn't even know how to use a gun, and that she saw me shoot my own dog. They believed her and think I need psychiatric help. FML

#21378741
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31421) - you deserved it (1986)

On 03/21/2015 at 1:36am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, during a meal out with my team and bosses, I wasn't drinking. The waiter complained, "If you're not ordering alcohol, how am I supposed to take advantage of you later?" I'm not sure what's worse, the rapey pre-dinner joke or the awkward silence as my colleagues looked on. FML

Today, I came home from work to find that my girlfriend had sold all of my N64 and Atari games and both the consoles and bought me a PS4 with the money. While I was standing there in shock, she kissed me on the cheek and said, "I know, I'm the greatest." FML

#21361122
462 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44367) - you deserved it (4021)

On 02/22/2015 at 3:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got drunk at a party. I didn't want my parents to know, so I took out my phone, called my parents, and asked them not to tell them I'm drunk. FML

#21354315
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18771) - you deserved it (35634)

On 02/11/2015 at 7:40pm - misc - by SDCore (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom and I went to exchange a massive stuffed animal, which was meant for my niece. I was carrying it when I saw a really hot guy looking at me funny. My mom snickered and told him that I never go anywhere without "George". FML

#21325643
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31182) - you deserved it (2883)

On 12/28/2014 at 1:52am - misc - by thanks a lot mom - United States (California)

Today, my mom finally got a Netflix account after months of me begging. When I asked her what the login was, she refused to give it to me. She said, "Netflix will know it's not me and then they'll cancel our account." FML

Today, my boss at my new call center job said he'd gotten complaints about me. Apparently I sound "too black" and it's "upsetting" some of our customers. I don't know what that even means, but my boss said I need to "tone it down or we're gonna have some problems". FML

#21310827
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36811) - you deserved it (3494)

On 12/03/2014 at 4:21pm - work - by WTF - United States (Texas)



FML's blog

  • FML's Question Time #2 : School
  • We tried this before and it went pretty well, so here's another blog section for everyone to have give their opinion on a popular but controversial subject. OK, we're not debating a…

Thursday 23 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: