FML: Karolann_

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Karolann_

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Town/Country : Columbia, US
Title : Miss
Birth Date : Tuesday 8 January 1991 (21 years)
Number of visits : 1375
Number of comments : 0
Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Karolann_'s favorite FMLs

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

#19631928 (465)

I agree, your life sucks (9135) - you deserved it (833)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

#19623439 (273)

I agree, your life sucks (10240) - you deserved it (1093) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm - misc - by lafinesse (woman) -

Today, I had to pick my son up from school after he beat the crap out of another student. The words that made him go nuts were apparently, "You mad, bro?" FML

#19607657 (273)

I agree, your life sucks (6292) - you deserved it (862)

On 05/11/2012 at 3:30pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. I had to fart really badly, so thinking that he wouldn't hear me, I did so. He heard me and asked, "Did you fart?" I said "No, it was my dog." I don't have a dog, and he knows this. FML

#19606194 (190)

I agree, your life sucks (1429) - you deserved it (6636)

On 05/11/2012 at 5:33am - misc - by anamota89 (woman) - United States

Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML

#19572377 (171)

I agree, your life sucks (3287) - you deserved it (10673)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States

Today, I was working at the local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumbles in, grabs two cases of beer and puts them on the counter. Then she grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it right there, shows me, and says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML

#19572319 (167)

I agree, your life sucks (20352) - you deserved it (1092)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:08am - work - by viviham - United States (Texas)

Today, it was confirmed that the "no pet rule" in my apartment complex is so strict that I'm not even allowed to have sea monkeys. FML

#19561558 (124)

I agree, your life sucks (6093) - you deserved it (659)

On 05/01/2012 at 11:59pm - animals - by Monkeyless (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, while vacuuming my new apartment, I farted a few times. After my last fart, I turned to find my super-hot neighbor standing at the door. Panicking, I asked in a "I-didn't-just-fart-my-ass" tone, "Oh hi! Been standing there for long?" She replied, "Since your initial rip." FML

#19489197 (171)

I agree, your life sucks (16415) - you deserved it (3867)

On 04/18/2012 at 9:43am - misc - by Fartfail (man) - Hong Kong

Today, I had to put one of my preschool students in timeout for masturbating during nap time. FML

#19486028 (356)

I agree, your life sucks (8740) - you deserved it (776)

On 04/17/2012 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by lindsaykay - United States

Today, my ex-husband officially became my step dad. FML

#19421919 (418)

I agree, your life sucks (22440) - you deserved it (1053)

On 04/07/2012 at 4:20am - love - by ladylarni - Australia

Today, I woke up super glued to the toilet. FML

#19420355 (196)

I agree, your life sucks (6573) - you deserved it (2594)

On 04/06/2012 at 10:26pm - misc - by Tanner - United States (Oregon)

Today, the mouse trap I set in my kitchen worked. I caught a snake. FML

#19416665 (183)

I agree, your life sucks (20878) - you deserved it (1784)

On 04/06/2012 at 9:17am - animals - by rubberduckie94 (woman) - United States

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend and I were in bed. She slipped her hand under the duvet, and I got all excited thinking she was going to give me a hand job. She was actually pulling out her wedgie. FML

#19416403 (143)

I agree, your life sucks (4661) - you deserved it (2195)

On 04/06/2012 at 7:10am - intimacy - by TJ - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is afraid of a female orgasms. Right as I was about to climax, he panicked, pulled out, and ran into the bathroom. FML

#19410577 (212)

I agree, your life sucks (9226) - you deserved it (771)

On 04/05/2012 at 2:47am - intimacy - by displeased - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was cleaning the windows at work and a guy walked in so I opened the door for him. After I opened the door, he stood there with his eyes closed and his arms open. I thought he wanted a hug so I hugged him. Apparently he wanted me to spray him with Windex. FML

#19409952 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (13663) - you deserved it (1735)

On 04/05/2012 at 12:13am - work - by Kait - United States

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