Karley_jo

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Karley_jo

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 681
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Karley_jo : I'm outgoing and fun to be around I like to fish and hunt. Sleep and Xbox it up! I'm always willing to meet new people if you wanna know more. Ask!

Karley_jo's page activity

Visits<b>sillybilly132</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 7:10pm<b>jonsmith01973</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 12:25pm<b>Covenant74</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 9:12pm<b>metalhead4740</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 1:25pm<b>rob02</b> - the 06/18/2013 at 10:44am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 06/15/2013 at 2:07pm<b>ayazdgrade</b> - the 06/14/2013 at 5:59am<b>boudin227</b> - the 06/11/2013 at 8:37pm<b>efelsh</b> - the 06/11/2013 at 6:42pm<b>awesommessofpies</b> - the 06/11/2013 at 1:06pm<b>kpc2424</b> - the 06/07/2013 at 7:50am<b>silverstream20</b> - the 06/06/2013 at 1:54pm<b>SydneyGrey</b> - the 06/06/2013 at 12:26am<b>nuux74</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 9:06pm<b>anne90210</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 7:55am<b>Ambient25</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 4:47am<b>MWidderAUDI</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 1:03pm<b>fareith</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 10:21am

Karley_jo's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of Karley_jo's badges

Karley_jo's favorite FMLs

Today, I foolishly thought that I was alone in the house, and let out a huge fart on the toilet. This went on for a while due to an upset stomach. I later walked into the living room only to find my parents and a few of their friends sitting on the couch, teary-eyed from laughing so much. FML

Today, I faced my severe phobia of spiders in order to remove a rather large one from my home. After 20 minutes of desperate struggling, it was finally taken care of. Relieved, I sat down and glanced across the hallway just in time to see a second, equally large spider strutting across the wall. FML

Today, I again had to quietly sneak in through my bedroom window. I don't live with my parents. I go through my window because my cat thinks everyone who walks in through the door at night is a burglar or something and attacks them. FML

by Anonymous / 06/21/2013 at 10:28am / United States / Animals

Today, my husband was in our newborn's room, holding and talking to him. I guess he forgot the baby monitor, because I overheard him say, "Wanna know a secret? Daddy kills people." I really hope he was just quoting Dexter. FML

by imarriedanaxemurderer / 06/18/2013 at 1:01am / United States (Illinois) / Kids

Today, my sister sent me countless pictures of my boyfriend making out with different girls at a bar. His excuse? Photoshop. FML

by Anonymous / 06/15/2013 at 3:32am / United States (Louisiana) / Love

Today, I went to pick up my 6-year-old son from his friend's house. They were having a great time, and he didn't want to leave. So, while I wasn't looking, he superglued both his hands to their kitchen table. FML

by firestar772 / 06/12/2013 at 2:21am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was told by my grandfather that I was no longer allowed to visit him or to set foot in his house. Why? He found out I have been taking Japanese and German as electives in my degree, so I must be an 'enemy spy'. FML

by Frazz / 06/10/2013 at 1:09am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2013 at 3:10am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I found shit on my windshield. I'm not sure if it is human or animal, but it was conveniently smeared all over and even more was placed under my wipers just in case I used them to clean it up. This isn't the first time, and I have no idea who I could have pissed off. FML

by windshitwipers / 05/30/2013 at 5:41am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I heard my grandma sobbing in her room. After finally convincing her to tell me what was wrong, she confessed to watching a porn video last night. She thinks not being able to sleep afterwards is a sign that God is punishing her, and that she's damned our family to hell. FML

by Anonymous / 05/23/2013 at 1:48pm / Romania (Buzau) / Miscellaneous

Today, our cat died. My five-year-old tried to flush him down the toilet. FML

Today, I decided I would try this feature on my banking app which lets me deposit checks by sending a picture of it. The instructions say to rip the check after depositing. The deposit didn't work and now I've got a ripped up paycheck. FML

by Checkless chick / 05/08/2013 at 6:21pm / United States / Money

Today, while driving my grandma home from a family dinner, I had to pull into a gas station, because my tank was almost empty. She became convinced that someone would kidnap her while I went to pay, and eventually threatened to blow us up by tossing her lighter at the gas pumps. FML

by fuckingjesusgran / 05/07/2013 at 6:13pm / Bosnia and Herzegovina (Federation of Bosnia and Herzego) / Transportation

Today, I was in the doctor's office waiting for my husband to arrive, when a little old lady sat beside me. She seemed nice, until she started farting and blaming it on me. They weren't silent; they sounded like trucker farts and smelled like death. I was there for over an hour. FML

by babs / 05/07/2013 at 3:07pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

by Anonymous / 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm / United States / Health