About Karamelo : Just fighting off insomnia... =\
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Socialite
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Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25344) - you deserved it (4080)
On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I had an interview for an internship at an independent lawyer's office. Hoping to increase my chances of being hired, I dressed up sexily with a short skirt, high heels, and ample cleavage. Turns out his wife handles the interviews. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7391) - you deserved it (83409) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I was upset after a fight with my husband, so I cried alone in the bedroom. My 4-year-old son then comes in and hugs me. I thought he was trying to comfort me, but he then told me he had to go get his quarter my husband had promised to pay him if he made me shut up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25179) - you deserved it (2785)
On 08/22/2011 at 3:38am - kids - by Danielle - United States (New York)
Today, I went into a public bathroom and walked in on a guy checking his butt out in the mirror to see if he'd wiped properly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25044) - you deserved it (1740)
On 08/21/2011 at 8:03pm - misc - by Bobby ray slice - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me while we were at the pool. He seemed shocked that I wasn't crying. A slim girl in a bikini walked past and said, "Don't worry, fat people are used to it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34851) - you deserved it (4297)
On 08/15/2011 at 1:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)
Today, I was so drunk that I gave my mom's number instead of mine to the really cute guy I met at the bar. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7702) - you deserved it (30269)
On 08/14/2011 at 10:51pm - love - by MC (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was driving my twin daughters to school, when I accidentally honked my horn. I told them it was an accident. One of my kids said she already knew, because I didn't yell "asshole" afterwards. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7072) - you deserved it (24549)
Today, my boyfriend got arrested. For robbing my house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28906) - you deserved it (4002)
On 08/09/2011 at 1:38pm - misc - by iliketoastalot - United States (New York)
Today, my friend and I gave our numbers to some guys at a bar. Twenty minutes after we had left, we got a call. We excitedly answered the phone, only to hear the guy ask, "So are you the fat one or the ugly one?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (23615) - you deserved it (5086)
On 08/08/2011 at 11:43pm - misc - by me - United States
Today, I was talking with my mom about getting the my school photos retouched. I believe her exact words were, "They'll take one look at you, and charge me triple." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24572) - you deserved it (3060)
On 08/08/2011 at 2:12pm - misc - by yupppp (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was sitting in the hospital waiting area. An old lady was crying, and my five year old daughter asked her, "Are you okay?" The woman quietly nodded, prompting my daughter to scream at the top of her lungs, "Well shut up then!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28544) - you deserved it (8924)
On 08/06/2011 at 9:40pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I met my new roommate. She severely struggled with pronouncing my name, and decided that to save time and the effort, she's just going to call me what she thinks my name sounds like: Lube. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17867) - you deserved it (2066)
On 08/05/2011 at 4:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)
Today, my daughter wouldn't stop yapping on about not being able to register on the new Harry Potter website. The amount of whiny jibber-jabber emanating from her cake-hole made me want to boot her from our family tree, and I had to resort to booze to wash the pain away. I'm a terrible parent. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10893) - you deserved it (41740)
On 08/04/2011 at 9:41am - kids - by makeitstop (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I realized that as a U.S. Marine in the infantry, I'm more afraid to talk to girls than I am of getting shot at. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34277) - you deserved it (4135)
On 08/03/2011 at 3:40am - love - by Tim - United States
Today, I broke my leg while trying to show my friend how I broke my other leg. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18199) - you deserved it (49524)
On 08/02/2011 at 10:17am - health - by chinchilla4404 (woman) - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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