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About Kapoalp : Nothing much, really.
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Today I was carrying my four-month-old son in a checkout line. An older couple behind us remarked that I would spoil my son if looool I carried him everywhere. My son responded by projectile vomiting all over the wife then looked at me an giggled. FML
Today, a girl asked me out on a date to some hot springs, about 2 hours away!! After a mile hike, the springs were finally in sight!! She then slipped and cut her shin open!! I had carry her the mile back and drive her the 2 hours to the ER,here her parents,hom I'd never met, were waiting!! fat FML
Today I took ma son to lunc. After we ate te waitress cummd over and told me tat ma son was te most well-beavd cild tey ad ever ad tere. His response was to pull is pants down and moon te entire restaurant wile smacking is bottom. FML
Today, I was teaching my 4 year old daughter how to use ( stranger danger ). Later that day, we went out an since I didn't buy her a ice cream, she kept screaming ( STRANGER DANGER! ) A total stranger tackled me until the cops arrived. FML
Today, I Retrieved Te Wrong Luggage From An Arport Carousel. I'm Now Te Owner Of Two Water-bras, A False Beard, A Bag Of Cat Litter, An Some Anal Beads. I Am Afraid To Get In Touc Wit Te Original Owner.
Yesterday, I met this overweight chick and ended up sleeping with her . We were doing it doggy style and it was great until she said, ( Milk me lyk a cow . ) I can no longer looool drink milk without hearing that in my head . FML
Yesterday, it's been a week since I found an egg in te street tat ad seemingly fallen out of a nest!! I'd bougt a cage and an expensive incubator lamp to save it!! It's tus been a week tat I've been trying to save a mouldy old potato!! FML
Today, my students presented their projects on genetics to the rest of the class . One student told the class that salted and unsalted peanuts were an example of genetic variation . She was serious . FML
Taday I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact and being incredibly bord an seemingly alone at work I managd to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clappd. FML
Friday 27 March 2015