About KailyKii : Hi Stalker! Welcome to my profile.
I'm normally sarcastic, live with it.
I'm not a crazy grammar nazi, although I prefer not to "taip liyk dis".
I love the fact that some peoples comments are better than the FML.
I can't reply to messages. :/
That is all.
About KailyKii : Hi Stalker! Welcome to my profile.
KailyKii's FML badges
50 quality responses
Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.
Back from a party
An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
KailyKii's favorite FMLs
Today, I went to the bar to celebrate my friend's birthday party. I gave the bouncer my ID and he kicked me out, saying that I should at least use an ID card with the correct gender. I'm 22 and female, he thought I was an underage boy. FML
by Anonymous / 09/27/2009 at 12:10am / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous
Today, an old friend that I never really liked invited me to lunch while she was in town. While driving back to her car, I couldn't find my phone, so she offered to call it. She found it under the passenger seat and also saw that when she called, her name came up as "Sabrina-IGNORE". FML
by veggocake / 09/26/2009 at 4:05am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/16/2009 at 9:43pm / United States (Texas) / Health
Today, I found out that my boss plays a trick on all the interns. He calls you to his office, then leaves you waiting outside until you get annoyed and leave. Apparently, the old record was 45mins. I waited 4 hours. FML
by stillwaiting / 09/15/2009 at 5:32pm / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Work
Today, I was walking with my very attractive friend who I like a lot. She then told me that her roomate wouldn't be home tonight, and if I wanted, I could come over and study history. I didn't get it. I told her no thanks, that I was covered, and it was chem I needed to study. An hour later, I understood. FML
by itisthedude / 09/10/2009 at 7:17pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
Today, my friends and I went to the beach and we were tanning when I suddenly saw 10 roses floating in the ocean. I went around to pick up all the roses and threw the petals at my friends. Then I notice a big boat of people in black and white were looking at me with disgust. It was a funeral. FML
by Anonymous / 09/06/2009 at 7:09pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to my school to take my yearbook picture. I was wearing a shirt that said ANALOG on the front. When I bent in to take the picture, part of my shirt overlapped itself. Now I'm known as the ANAL kid in the yearbook. FML
by boytoy / 09/02/2009 at 5:23pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to the bank to deposit the cash I made waiting tables. While the teller was counting, I apologized for having so many small bills and she said "It's OK honey, I helped another one of your kind just the other day. You're lucky we take your dirty money." She thought I was a stripper. FML
by adriana / 09/01/2009 at 12:48pm / United States (Utah) / Money
Today, I finished writing the most perfect love letter for this girl at summer school. At the end of the letter I signed: Your secret admirer. Cute, right? Not really. Turns out I was so anxious to finish the letter that I ended up writing my name at the bottom. FML
by footyfallout / 08/16/2009 at 1:17am / Canada (Quebec) / Love
Today, I saw my girlfriend with an older guy who I thought was her dad, I went over to introduce myself. And then turned around and walked away very fast as I saw them make out. My girlfriend is cheating on me with someone as old as my dad. FML
by roobb / 08/09/2009 at 7:11pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, I was having breakfast when my mom's boyfriend came and sat right across from me. He didn't try and hide the fact that he was staring at my chest and told me, "Wow, you're getting bigger." I glared at him. He winked at me. FML
by oshitdonotwant / 08/08/2009 at 9:42am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
by rivercitybarf / 08/08/2009 at 4:48am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had a seizure at my boyfriend's. The second I began to seize, he cursed and picked me up, dropping me on the floor complaining "Now I have to clean the damn couch." I had urinated because I had no control over my body. The couch is still stained. He dumped me for ruining his furniture. FML
by notsomuchinlove / 08/07/2009 at 4:55am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I got pulled over for the first time since I got my license. I have disorganized speech and occasional inappropriate emotional response. I began to laugh due to nervousness and when I tried to explain why, I was arrested because he thought I was high. FML
by Jesse / 08/01/2009 at 3:24pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/30/2009 at 5:23am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
- Today, my girlfriend agreed to doing it doggy style. During it all, I pulled on her hair. I guess I… Today, I found out what "supersoaked" means. I thought it meant getting shot by a water gun, which… Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Right as I was really getting into it, he pauses, frowns,…
- Today, I’m in China, and I took my Golden Retriever to the groomer’s to get him cleaned up, because… Today, I’m a French teacher abroad, and as my beard has a huge hole near my chin, my students call… Today, I’m in Mexico for an internship. I was at a party when a drunk guy harangued me, calling me…