Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

K_kanaka

Offline (the 06/21/2014 at 11:47am) | Search for a member

K_kanaka

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 16427
  • Number of comments : 218
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About K_kanaka : I was born and raised in Hilo, Hawaii(for those that don't know that is the rainy part of the state)
I go on FML to get a good laugh.
I also like to make new friends so message me

K_kanaka's page activity

Visits<b>starbarbazar</b> - yesterday at 1:00pm<b>IAMKDI</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 12:43am<b>papashaan</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 9:53pm<b>wjsgkrbs</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 10:24pm<b>grritsshay</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 1:27pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 4:14pm<b>dekovennicolee</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 11:18pm<b>SuperCaroline131</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 1:38pm<b>blu8</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 11:53am<b>Tbear11</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 5:55pm<b>lolwhatthehellz</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 3:53am<b>IrishKelp</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 10:20am<b>poncho55</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 2:15am<b>maxyutd</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 3:08am<b>Ghost_Kaulitz</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 2:06pm<b>razi1</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 10:57pm<b>tmac815</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 10:03pm<b>JenniferNThomas</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 4:33pm

Liked!<b>ChloeLentin</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 2:06pm

K_kanaka's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of K_kanaka's badges

K_kanaka's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend told me that sometimes my nipples taste like onions. FML

#21012735
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42013) - you deserved it (7793)

On 01/01/2014 at 8:26am - intimacy - by Snufflopagus (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was dressing in front of my boyfriend. He was looking at me in wonder and I assumed this was a good thing. Then he muttered, "God damn, you're awkwardly shaped." FML

#21011563
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38242) - you deserved it (2912)

On 12/31/2013 at 12:47pm - misc - by awkword (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was watching ESPN. My boyfriend came in, bitched about "boring tv," so I handed him the remote. He put on a Lifetime movie. I must be the only woman in America with this problem. FML

#21010622
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45468) - you deserved it (4588)

On 12/30/2013 at 4:38pm - love - by smokecloud_ (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my 4-year-old daughter figured out how to set a parental code lock on our television so we can't watch football because it scares her when we scream. She won't tell us no matter what we bribe her with. FML

#21010264
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42604) - you deserved it (21752)

On 12/30/2013 at 7:10am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I have to take time off from work to take part in an intervention because my sister's obsession with the guy from Harry Potter has crossed over into illegality. FML

#21009908
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37637) - you deserved it (2973)

On 12/29/2013 at 11:23pm - misc - by LeaveHimAlone (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my dog has found a new game he likes. It involves him rolling around on my new bed sheets to build up static electricity and run and poke me with his nose so I get shocked. FML

#21008001
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41676) - you deserved it (4633)

On 12/28/2013 at 3:23am - animals - by honeybunny90 - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML

#21007475
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44623) - you deserved it (5004)

On 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I overheard my boyfriend bragging to his friend about finally giving me an orgasm yesterday, but that he got scared because my orgasm face made me look like "a camel having a stroke." FML

#21007355
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41048) - you deserved it (3780)

On 12/27/2013 at 3:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Jamaica (Saint Andrew)

Today, I announced my pregnancy to my husband. He responded with, "Well shit, when do these faucets turn on?" and started honking my boobs. FML

#21006112
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35511) - you deserved it (4681)

On 12/26/2013 at 12:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I watched "Time of the Doctor" and I'm pretty sure my love of Doctor Who slithered out through my ear and shamefully lodged itself in the darkest corner of the room, crying. FML

#21005939
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30475) - you deserved it (7863)

On 12/26/2013 at 7:08am - love - by anon - Australia

Today, my boyfriend of five years got me a ring for Christmas. When I opened it, I was speechless and overjoyed. He then said, "It's just a ring. It doesn't mean anything." FML

#21003775
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42941) - you deserved it (4553)

On 12/24/2013 at 3:30pm - love - by Wtfbro (woman) - United States

Today, like every day since I was born, my name is Yarenis, pronounced "ja-ra-nees. For some reason, everybody pronounce it "your anus". FML

#21003362
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36730) - you deserved it (4741)

On 12/24/2013 at 5:45am - misc - by yarenis - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my mom called to bestow upon me warm holiday pearls of wisdom: "I hope you aren't giving everyone your natural handmade eco-shit again. Gifts should be returnable. And have a price." FML

Today, I diagnosed a patient with a spastic colon. For some reason, the term "spastic colon" has always amused me, and I burst into uncontrollable laughter as I said it. By the time I managed to stop laughing, my eyes were watering and my patient was visibly angry. FML

#21002747
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20133) - you deserved it (41930)

On 12/23/2013 at 6:11pm - work - by dr immature (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, a guy punched me in the subway for staring at his girlfriend. I had dark glasses on, and was fast asleep. FML

#21002133
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41980) - you deserved it (3121)

On 12/23/2013 at 3:24am - misc - by GogglesGoggles - United States



FML's blog

  • Élodie's Illustrated FML
  • Aaaaah, the beach, the sunshine, cool water against our skin...  Nah, just kidding, I can't afford a trip to the beach. This blog is being written from a grotty apartment in the less salubrious parts of…

Friday 18 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: