Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

K_kanaka

Offline (6 hours ago) | Search for a member

K_kanaka

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 21216
  • Number of comments : 221
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About K_kanaka : I was born and raised in Hilo, Hawaii(for those that don't know that is the rainy part of the state)
I go on FML to get a good laugh.
I also like to make new friends so message me

K_kanaka's page activity

Visits<b>ksadhera</b> - yesterday at 7:57pm<b>dustydick</b> - yesterday at 5:11pm<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 8:43am<b>sorryheadphones</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 10:05pm<b>lisaint</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 7:21am<b>so_smooth</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 12:38am<b>adamant84</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 8:27am<b>chidexy</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 1:06am<b>BBlah</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 6:19am<b>Mynameislinh</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 2:33pm<b>lunacadence</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 11:12pm<b>thatkid00117</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 6:28pm<b>Khaleesi_26</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 6:15pm<b>imbatmanfir</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 8:35pm<b>times22</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 9:40am<b>abattior</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 9:43pm<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 9:57pm<b>Just_A_Tree</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 7:46pm

Liked!<b>ChloeLentin</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 2:06pm

K_kanaka's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of K_kanaka's badges

K_kanaka's favorite FMLs

Today, I was denied membership to an all-women's gym. Why? Because "men are not permitted to join". I am and have always been female. FML

#18255210
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35620) - you deserved it (3534)

On 11/15/2011 at 12:48pm - misc - by insulted - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my daughter-in-law taught my 4-year-old grandson to burst into tears and yell, "Am I not good enough for you?" whenever I ask her if she's going to have any more children. FML

#18254436
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12534) - you deserved it (56875)

On 11/15/2011 at 10:16am - kids - by Margo (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my mom called me crazy and told me she wanted to put me in a mental hospital. She did this after repeatedly hitting me with a shoe. Why? Because I forgot to put the cap back on the toothpaste. FML

#18253944
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33698) - you deserved it (3290)

On 11/15/2011 at 7:51am - misc - by whoopsboutthecap - United States

Today, a neighbor came by while I was cooking. She asked for some of my cheese, so I gave her a big slice and told her I only had cheddar. She angrily refused to accept the slice, and made her way to my fridge. She then yelled at me for not having an assortment of cheeses. FML

#18253335
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32306) - you deserved it (3009)

On 11/15/2011 at 3:40am - misc - by SetoAyumi - United States (California)

Today, an asshat in a Foghorn Leghorn t-shirt let his piece-of-crap mongrel dog do some sort of rain dance on the roof of my car, scratching the paintwork. He was a huge guy, so my backbone left town and I just smiled as if it was cute. FML

#18251877
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20318) - you deserved it (9834)

On 11/14/2011 at 11:51pm - animals - by MY CAR (man) - United States (California)

Today, my date threw a fit, burst into tears, and made a huge scene in the middle of a crowded restaurant, all because I offered to pay. FML

Today, I bought weed for the first time. The dealer was an undercover cop. FML

Today, I have two black eyes. The first one I got from the girl whose ass I mistakenly grabbed at a party last night. The other one I got from my girlfriend when I explained the first one. FML

#18240312
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15495) - you deserved it (29744)

On 11/13/2011 at 7:11pm - misc - by ThatHurts (man) - Canada

Today, like every day, I used my phone while taking a dump. As I reached for some toilet paper to wipe myself, my sister pounded on the door for me to hurry up. I yelled "Fine," and without realizing it, wiped myself with my phone. FML

#18239656
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15085) - you deserved it (52629)

On 11/13/2011 at 5:46pm - misc - by shootme - Canada

Today, like every day, I used my phone while taking a dump. As I reached for some toilet paper to wipe myself, my sister pounded on the door for me to hurry up. I yelled "Fine," and without realizing it, wiped myself with my phone. FML

#18239656
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15085) - you deserved it (52629)

On 11/13/2011 at 5:46pm - misc - by shootme - Canada

Today, the guy I've recently started seeing confided that he's relieved I'm on the heavier side, and that he has a thing for watching chubby women eat. I just reached my ideal weight after losing 40 pounds. FML

#18238622
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33154) - you deserved it (3589)

On 11/13/2011 at 3:50pm - love - by notfatanymore (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I brought my girlfriend of six months over to meet my family. When my grandpa saw her, he said, "What a waste of good breeding stock." FML

#18236963
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23712) - you deserved it (2185)

On 11/13/2011 at 12:10pm - love - by mandie - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my daughter asked me how to spell "Orange". "O-R-A-N-G-E" I replied. Without missing a beat, she says "No, I mean the colour, not the fruit." She is 16. FML

#18234448
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40533) - you deserved it (7074)

On 11/13/2011 at 1:53am - kids - by weswithaute - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML

#18217902
379 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18390) - you deserved it (77417)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:53am - intimacy - by dumbassbuffet (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startled and peed all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML

#18202922
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29830) - you deserved it (22199)

On 11/09/2011 at 4:52pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: