About K_kanaka : I was born and raised in Hilo, Hawaii(for those that don't know that is the rainy part of the state)
I go on FML to get a good laugh.
I also like to make new friends so message me
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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Today, while working at a pizza shop near a college campus, I got an order to deliver to the dorms. Extremely busy at work and annoyed that someone wouldn't take 3 minutes to walk over, I spat on the pizza. When I arrived to the dorm, a woman in a wheelchair opened the door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9536) - you deserved it (167636)
On 05/09/2009 at 12:43am - work - by pizzagurl (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was pulled over for speeding. When the police officer approached me and asked for license and registration, I accidentally gave him my fake I.D. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12559) - you deserved it (94879)
On 05/06/2009 at 4:05pm - misc - by FakeID (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I went to meet my girlfriends parents for the first time. I accidentally drove past their house the first time, but saw the whole family outside waiting to meet me. I pulled a U-Turn and heard a thud. The whole family watched me run over their dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (198326) - you deserved it (38551)
On 05/05/2009 at 11:37am - animals - by Rhyno - United States (New York)
Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (207884) - you deserved it (10116)
On 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I was playing one on one soccer with a girl like. I accidentally kicked the ball right into her face. The ball rolled back towards me and as I was running to see if she was ok, I kicked the ball... right into her face again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56218) - you deserved it (22801)
On 04/29/2009 at 10:35am - misc - by hyper12332 (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was the best man at a wedding and I was flirting with a cute bridesmaid. Then this old guy decides to give the newlyweds a toast. He made a crappy joke and barely anybody laughed. So I say to the girl "Wow that sucked, who the hell does he think he is?" The girl replies "That's my dad". FML
I agree, your life sucks (8178) - you deserved it (50799)
On 04/22/2009 at 2:24pm - misc - by derranged - China (Tianjin)
Today, I celebrated my 21st birthday. My boyfriend of almost 3 years gave me a big pink vibrator. Thinking it was a joke I said: "I won't need this as long as I have you!" His reply: "That's what I wanted to talk to you about." FML
I agree, your life sucks (94841) - you deserved it (4895)
On 04/18/2009 at 3:20am - love - by mylifesucks (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)
Today, I was driving home from school, when I saw this girl I like walking home. Trying to be polite, I pulled over and asked if she wanted a ride. After my offer, I was rejected as she said "No, I'm actually already home," and walked up the nearest driveway... MY driveway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (67326) - you deserved it (4700)
On 04/16/2009 at 9:16pm - love - by Kelavmeister (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I went shopping with my friend. The store was having a special where if you spend over $75 you receive a free T-shirt. I paid for my items and my total was over $75. The salesman didn't hand me a shirt so I asked him for one. He looks at me and says "I'm sorry, we only have Mediums." FML
I agree, your life sucks (48281) - you deserved it (5163)
On 04/16/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by arrogantlondon (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was struggling through an exam and the hot girl next to me seemed to be flying through the questions. So I cheated off her. When we finished I asked her to lunch. She said "No, I just rushed through the exam so I can go fuck my boyfriend." I got shutdown and probably failed an exam. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7505) - you deserved it (73579)
On 04/15/2009 at 7:30pm - misc - by ananomoose - United States (Vermont)
Today, I took the bus to work and a sweet old lady got on after me and sat next to me. Halfway to work, she fell asleep and her head was on my shoulder. Trying to be nice, I gently tried to wake her up before my stop came. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (550567) - you deserved it (35367)
On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I got 20% tints on my car. As I'm driving home, a cop pulls me over. I didn't want to ruin my new tint by opening my window, so I opened my door as the cop approached. He then pulled out his gun and yelled "GET ON THE FUCKING GROUND!" before I could explain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34464) - you deserved it (48400)
On 04/13/2009 at 3:41pm - misc - by italy1986 (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I took one of those IQ tests on the internet. I cheated and still got a 70. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12524) - you deserved it (57862)
On 04/13/2009 at 2:42pm - misc - by snathans (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend of 5 years getting intimate with my best friend. When they saw me they immediately stopped and said nothing. After about 5 seconds of silence my boyfriend yells "April fools!" April Fools was 12 days ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (104646) - you deserved it (4748)
On 04/12/2009 at 6:47am - misc - by Aprilfools (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, brand new cocktail dress: $300. Matching peep toe heels: $100. Getting my hair done at the salon: $80. Treating myself to a mani/pedi: $50. When finally meeting the guy I have been chatting online with for 2 months, I find out hes my cousin: priceless. FML
I agree, your life sucks (148599) - you deserved it (46702)
On 04/10/2009 at 2:42pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Monday 20 May 2013
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