Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

K_kanaka

Online | Search for a member

K_kanaka

5Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 28640
  • Number of comments : 229
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About K_kanaka : I was born and raised in Hilo, Hawaii(for those that don't know that is the rainy part of the state)
I now live in Honolulu O'ahu for college.
I go on FML to get a good laugh.
I also like to make new friends so message me

K_kanaka's page activity

Visits<b>jay_ladybug</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 10:42pm<b>cutycat136</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 7:31pm<b>fatiezzhm</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 5:25pm<b>Brunofk7</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 9:38am<b>MDoremis</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 6:32am<b>EmmaRey</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 8:08pm<b>Sebastian2022</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 6:45pm<b>aliceablaze</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 10:21am<b>bvbgleek</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 11:50am<b>Awsemogreeb</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 6:41pm<b>jentrynicole</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 5:51pm<b>RusticChick</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 3:53pm<b>ohjoy15</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 3:49pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 9:08am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 9:24am<b>mxgirl1998</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 6:02pm<b>limafova</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 2:28pm<b>gez114</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 10:37am

Liked!<b>Aseemdawg</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 1:41am<b>Lesser</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 4:08am<b>Angelkisses130</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 12:15am<b>watermelon15</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 3:31pm

K_kanaka's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of K_kanaka's badges

K_kanaka's favorite FMLs

Today, after 3 hours of sleep, I had to rush to my grandmother's house because she fell and couldn't get up. An embarrassed, half-naked old lady, a very wet rug, an ambulance and a trip to the hospital later, and she still refuses to use her cane and walker. I hope I'm not this stubborn when I'm old. FML

Today, a police car hit my parked vehicle, likely due to icy road conditions. When the officer came over to talk to me, I assumed it was to give me his insurance information. Nope. It was to give me a ticket for 'impeding a police officer'. My car was in my driveway. FML

#21357102
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39142) - you deserved it (2037)

On 02/16/2015 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while working at Subway I joked with a customer asking him if he was going to order in Spanish. The women in front of him began yelling about how I was being racist and told my manager that I needed to be fired. The customer I was joking with was my Spanish teacher. FML

#21356827
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35147) - you deserved it (2283)

On 02/15/2015 at 5:39pm - work - by anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I'm extremely uncomfortable with eye contact, but he kept staring into my eyes the entire time. I had to sing the F.U.N. song from Spongebob in my head to stop myself having an anxiety attack. FML

#21356336
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34719) - you deserved it (4929)

On 02/14/2015 at 10:41pm - intimacy - by jessybear777 - United States (Missouri)

Today, my girlfriend wanted to roleplay as a schoolgirl. I was excited, until we started and she asked me to lick her "vajayjay". I cringed so hard, my skull practically caved in. I broke down laughing while trying to explain my cringing. Now she's pissed and I'm blue-balled. FML

#21355947
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28735) - you deserved it (8961)

On 02/14/2015 at 12:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland

Today, my grandma rushed into my work and told my manager I had to leave due to a family emergency. Panicked, I ran to get my stuff and ran to the car. When I asked what had happened, she replied, "I needed someone to go see 50 Shades of Grey with me." FML

#21355550
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33001) - you deserved it (3375)

On 02/13/2015 at 8:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my thundercunt of a neighbor, who's hated me since I moved in, called the cops on me. He told them he saw me shooting up on drugs. I'm diabetic and was injecting insulin, which he could only have seen by spying on me through my living room window. FML

#21355411
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33549) - you deserved it (1834)

On 02/13/2015 at 3:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, my husband fell asleep while cuddling. I didn't want to wake him, so I lay there for ages, trying to fall asleep. Just as I finally dozed off, my leg uncontrollably jerked and hit him in the nuts. He's convinced I did it deliberately as revenge for an argument we had 5 days ago. FML

#21355326
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27129) - you deserved it (2929)

On 02/13/2015 at 12:33pm - misc - by Innocence (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my "best friend" stole almost $1,000 worth of electronics and video games from my roommates and me, just so he could pawn them off and buy himself a new car stereo. FML

#21355305
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30076) - you deserved it (2625)

On 02/13/2015 at 11:36am - money - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, as a reward for finishing all my work in maths, I was told I could leave early. Apparently, later on, the class had a random attendance inspection. I didn't know about this until I received a detention for not being present at that class. My teacher had completely forgotten about me. FML

Today, while watching a clip of the show "16 and Pregnant" on YouTube in my room, my mom yelled from the kitchen that dinner was ready. Without skipping a beat, I yelled back, "I'm pregnant!" I'm a guy. FML

Today, I introduced my dad to my girlfriend. He looked her up and down and said to her, "Beggars can't be choosers. Am I right?" FML

Today, I had to fall asleep to my next-door neighbors having sex because our walls are paper thin. What bothered me the most wasn't listening to them doing it, but knowing that she was faking it. FML

#21354562
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31457) - you deserved it (2752)

On 02/12/2015 at 2:39am - intimacy - by Mkimmi (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boss refused to give me vacation time for my wedding and honeymoon because she didn't have a honeymoon and because of that apparently neither should I. FML

Today, I got drunk at a party. I didn't want my parents to know, so I took out my phone, called my parents, and asked them not to tell them I'm drunk. FML

#21354315
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18655) - you deserved it (35395)

On 02/11/2015 at 7:40pm - misc - by SDCore (man) - United States (Illinois)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: